


Unsung Heroes

by BrokenShadow, NattyWright



Series: Dragon Effect [1]
Category: Dragon Age (Video Games), Mass Effect
Genre: Angst, Badass Women, Better love story than Twilight, F/F, Fluff, Gayest space story ever, Multi, Polyamory, Possible Character Death, lots of fluff to come, space, space lesbians, super gay, that too
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-08-27
Updated: 2017-06-24
Packaged: 2018-08-11 08:15:21
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death
Chapters: 34
Words: 46,364
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7883572
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/BrokenShadow/pseuds/BrokenShadow, https://archiveofourown.org/users/NattyWright/pseuds/NattyWright
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Captain Lyla Mahariel of the GWS Griffon is investigating a distress call from the planet Ostagar. Along with Crystal Cousland and her away team, she will have to save the universe.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. A beginning,

**Author's Note:**

> This story is being written by NattyWright and SilentStormSociety. It’s a crossover world between Mass Effect and Dragon Age, set in a Star Trek styled universe. Hopefully you will all enjoy.
> 
> Want to read the backgrounds of our fully developed characters? 
> 
> Head to NattyWright's page and read "From The Dales To Denerim" to learn more about Lyla and Leliana Mahariel.
> 
> For Crystal and Morrigan's polyamorous story, look for "Spiritual Connection (The Rewrite)" under SilentStormSociety. (This fic is a Dragon Age/Skyrim crossover)

“Captain’s Log, Star Date 9,20

“Headquarters has ordered us on a scouting mission to Ostagar, a planet on the far reaches of the Ferelden system. Reports of a new blight have emerged, and the Grey Warden Federation is obliged to investigate. I will create a new log when we arrive.”

The recorder shut off with a hiss, leaving Captain Lyla Mahariel in silence with only her thoughts to keep her company, ignoring the still somehow sleeping woman in her bed.

She shared her bedroom onboard the GWS Griffon with her wife, Leliana Mahariel.  It was a mostly utilitarian room, holding only a single small replicator, the Captain’s log, their bed, and the women’s own private individual worship areas. They had different Gods, but it never got in between them.

She looked at herself in a small mirror and smiled as she saw her reflection. She had already braided her long, red hair into a ponytail, lifting it up to show off her elven ears, ignoring the scar across one. Her vallaslin stood out in contrast to her pale skin, and her scars seemed to accentuate it. She had fought lots of battles over the years, and they had taken their toll, including her left eye. The Federation were able to replace it, but deep down Lyla liked how she looked with the eyepatch and wore it over the bionic one she had. A silly thing but it helped her reputation as a fearless leader.

“Ma vhenan, it’s time to get up,” She whispered as she planted a kiss on Leliana’s head. “The bridge won’t run itself forever.”

Her wife grumbled as she opened her eyes, setting butterflies flying about Lyla’s stomach. “Yes, dear. I’ll meet you there. Love you.”

“Love you too,” Lyla giggled. She kissed her woman once more before stepping out of their room, onto the busy corridor.

The crew were on alert, the idea of the blight coming back was terrifying, a horror their Federation only just managed to defeat last time. A terrific, terrible battle that left them weak, and forced them into working for the other Empires. Not that they really cared, the Federation only existed to defeat the Blight, and the Darkspawn, the blight’s army.

Their alliance was useful for all though, the other Empires of the universe were all obligated to give people to the Grey Wardens. Orlesians, Fereldens, Asari, Krogan, Salarian, and many, many more species made up the ranks.

It was beautiful in its own way.

Lyla made her way towards the turbo lift, the crowds of people parting like the ocean once they saw their Captain. “Bridge,” She commanded as she entered.

“Captain on the bridge!” She called out as she stepped out, watching her crew salute her before going about their jobs. A good crew on a good ship. It was all she could ask for.

Her first Officer, Alistair, was another high-ranking Warden, eligible to captain his own ship if he truly wanted but he didn’t, leading wasn’t his strong suit he claimed, and Lyla was glad. The man was her friend and a good person.

Security Officer, Marian Hawke, A brilliant woman, and Lyla didn’t just think that because Hawke was dating her sister. Hawke was a distinguished fighter in her own right, smart enough to be a captain but she chose to stay with Lyla’s crew, to stay close to her lover.

Their Tactical officer was another distinguished fighter, Crystal Cousland. She was only an Ensign, but Lyla had seen something special in her. She was violent, perhaps a little too extreme for Main Headquarters, but she was a genius in battle. More a dancer than a fighter when she moved.

The Flight Controller was perhaps a strange choice, Isabela was not technically part of the Wardens, in fact, she was proud of a past that including piracy and other misdemeanours. But, she was the best navigator Lyla had ever seen and came recommended by her own sister, Merrill, something Lyla wouldn’t ignore.

Her sister was part of the Engineering team, a group that was led by the Chief Engineer Morrigan, a prickly woman to say the least but one of the best engineers the Wardens had ever seen.

The rest of the crew was just as impressive, and Lyla was delighted to lead them.

The turbo lift doors opened, and Lyla turned to see her Morale Officer walking towards her, looking just as gorgeous as ever. Leliana was part of the best Morale team ever assembled, but being the wife of the captain had some privileges, and Lyla was happy to abuse them to have her lover beside her on the bridge.

She spared her a smile before pressing the comms button on her chair.

“This is your Captain speaking,” she began. She imagined her crew stopping and listening to her, piling the pressure for her to make a good speech and she allowed herself one small moment of self-doubt, before pulling the brutal mask of confidence back over her face. “The archdemon is back, or at least that’s what Ferelden space claims. It is our **duty** to investigate it, falonen, we are Grey Warden’s, the blight should fear us!

“We are Grey Wardens, we are the sword that slices the dragon’s neck, we are the shield that protects the innocent from its corruption. We hear the monster’s call so that we can scream our own back at it. It will fear this ship, it will fear the Griffon.

“In War, Victory. In Peace, Vigilance. In Death, Sacrifice.”

She listened out and could hear the crew repeat the motto, this ship was massive, one of the biggest ever constructed but her elven hearing allowed her to just pick them up, and the microphones around the ship didn’t hurt.

“Isabela, bring us to warp.”


	2. Forever Indebted

"Set of course for Ferelden Space. Planet, Ostagar."

Crystal's eyes flickered up toward the beautiful commanding elven captain. She could not have been more honored to be serving under such a ruthless leader. Captain Mahariel had saved both Crystal and Isabela from their prison cells back at Headquarters; and for that alone, she would be eternally grateful.

They had been captured for pirating. Morrigan had argued on their behalf and convinced Lyla they'd be invaluable additions to the crew. They were lucky the elf could see reason. Isabela had jested that secretly the fearless leader had a soft spot for romance and obviously only rescued them to reunite the three women. Whatever the reason, Crystal had silently pledged her undying loyalty to Lyla, and to follow her every order without question.

Reuniting with Morrigan, their third romantic partner, had been a godsend as they had been separated for more than a year while Morrigan worked her way up the Federation ladder. To be working on the same ship with the two women she loved was more than she could have ever hoped for.

"Heading set. Due to arrive tomorrow, mid-day. Permission to be relieved, Captain? Mine and Ensign Cousland's shifts are over and we have… dinner plans." Isabela glanced Crystal's way and added a wink at the end as she mentioned dinner plans. A small half smile pulled at Crystal's lips; no one could make her truly smile like Isabela and Morrigan.

"Bloody hell, is it 0900 hours already? You three sure do have a tosh time for dinner."

"Joys of working the night shift," Isabela responded as she headed for tactical and grasped Crystal by the hand, dragging her toward the turbo-lift. "Night Captain."

As soon as the turbo-lift doors closed, Isabela was all over Crystal. Pushing her against the wall and pressing soft, succulent lips to Crystal's smooth, thin ones. "I've missed you all damn night, love" Isabela breathed as she crashed their lips together a second time. Crystal kissed her back quickly before lightly pushing the sexy pilot away. A laugh escaped the ensign as she said, "I literally work ten feet from you."

"I'm a physical being, love. You know that." Isabela whined.

"Deck two."

The Mess Hall was crowded with crew members eager to get their breakfast before starting the day. Crystal spotted Morrigan at a table near the back window before Isabela did, she grasped the caramel colored hand and led the way toward their partner. Crystal winked at the bard Maryden and got one back as they passed her. Maryden played the lute professionally for the crew during mealtimes which Crystal always loved. She missed the hobby desperately; sometimes she'd play Maryden's lute while the bard took a break. They became fast friends through their love of music.

Crystal leaned down to kiss Morrigan on the cheek before sitting in the seat across from her. Isabela did the same but took the seat beside Morrigan and slung an agile arm around the Lieutenant's shoulders while using her free hand to snatch Morrigan's toast from long, slender fingers before taking a bite. The raven-haired woman seemed unfazed, clearly use to the behavior.

The downfall of working the night shift meant they didn't get to spend as much time with Morrigan as they would have liked. The Chief Engineer, of course, was needed during the day. Morrigan had tried to get them all on the same duty roster, but until Crystal and Isabela could prove themselves to the Captain, they were stuck with night duty.

Having dinner while Morrigan had breakfast was the only time they really got to be together lately. They wouldn't see Morrigan again that day until she was crawling between them at night, completely and utterly exhausted from the long, daunting task of running the engineering bay.

Even then, all they could do was exchange a few lazy kisses, a couple of sluggish gropes before Morrigan was passed out asleep and the other women woke up groggy and readied themselves for their own shifts. They hoped it wouldn't be forever. They had hoped to get some time off soon but with reports of another blight, things weren't looking good.

"Morning my loves, I was beginning to think you weren't going to show. What kept you?" Morrigan asked, raising an eyebrow.

"Sorry Morrigan, Isabela got a little handsy in the turbo-lift."

"No more than usual," Isabela quipped.

Crystal caught Morrigan's sultry smile before looking up to the crewmember that approached their table. "Evening ladies, would you mind if I joined you this morning?"

Crystal patted the seat next to her. Aside from her lovers, Krem was her best friend on the ship and one void of a soldier on the field; she trusted no one more at her back than him. The handsome lad with dreamy eyes took his seat and flagged down the cook, indicating they had yet to be served.

Cole rushed over in an instant. "Hello Griffon crew, what can I get for you?"

"Errrr, are you rhyming, Cole?" Krem asked with a puzzled look.

"I did not mean to can't you see? Just sometimes this happens to me!" Cole grabbed the back of his neck and looked at his feet a moment while taking a few deep breaths as he collected himself. He was an odd one to be sure. Crystal didn't know why Lyla brought him on board, perhaps she felt sorry for the misplaced soul, it couldn't be because of his cooking. His food was quite terrible.

Cole cleared his throat before speaking again, "Food for you? And you? And you? Nourishing, reenergizing, nutritious sustenance so you may see the controls you mortals so desperately cling to. Control. Control is what you all desire; it is your power and your flaw and your—"

Isabela held a hand up to stop the pale faced guy from rambling on, "Three more breakfast trays, Cole. Thank you and goodbye." She rolled her eyes as the slim man skittered away and quickly returned with their order.

"Sooo," Krem began, "Any of you get a look at the new bard?"

"Maryden? Fancy her do you? I'm sure Crystal would be more than happy to introduce you. Love is bliss, Krem. Pursue it before it eludes you." Isabela pulled Morrigan in for an alluring kiss after making that statement, causing Krem to drop his jaw wide and gawk at the pair as they tongue wrestled.

Crystal couldn't help the snicker that escaped. She loved Isabela to death and found humor in how she embarrassed the soldier to no end.

"I'd be happy to introduce you Krem, I'll go get her right now." Krem turned redder than the red shoulder pads of Isabela's uniform just then.

A moment later, Crystal returned. "Maryden, I'd like you to meet my friend, Krem. He loves your music. Krem, Maryden."

"I have seen you here before. It is a pleasure to meet you finally, Krem." Maryden smiled a brilliant smile. Her voice was melodic and gazed at Krem affectionately.

"We'll leave you two alone," Crystal said, nodding toward the other two to leave with her. Crystal squeezed Krem's shoulder in reassurance before winking and turning to leave. When she looked back, Krem was holding out a chair, gesturing for Maryden to sit. He was always so chivalrous, a real lady killer. The three women broke out in laughter as soon as they escaped the Mess Hall.

"Have time to walk us home, love?" Crystal asked, hoping she could get a few extra minutes with her most neglected mate.

"Afraid not, my loves. I am already running late. I love you both; I'll see you tonight."

With grumbles, each woman kissed Morrigan goodbye as the Lieutenant headed the opposite direction. Isabela wrapped an arm around Crystal and pulled her close, "Cheer up Crystal. It won't always be like this."

"I know, I just…"

"Really miss her?" Isabela finished.

"Yeah."

"Let's go home, love. We can get you into a hot bath, and I promise to make you forget about her for a little while."

A predatory smile crossed Crystal's lips as they entered the elevator. "Deck three."

The plus side for Isabela and Crystal to be dating a high-ranking Lieutenant was they got to live in the VIP quarters of the ship. Spacious rooms, with roomy beds, and large bathtubs. Once they arrived, Crystal allowed her partner to drag her inside by the collar.

As soon as the doors hissed shut, modesty no longer existed between them. Lips crashed together with a bruising passion as anxious hands expertly tore at the clothes of the other until they were completely stripped bare. Isabela leaped into Crystal's arms and wrapped her legs around her lover's slender waist, knowing the woman was much stronger than she looked. Crystal walked them over to the bed; lips still locked as the ensign lowered Isabela to the mattress while gliding one hand up the pilot's smooth, toned thigh and taking her by storm.


	3. Ostagar, Warped

“Senior officers to the bridge,” Lyla released the comms button with a hiss. Her helmsman and the Tactical officer would be sleeping, but it was a necessary evil to wake them before they were scheduled to be on shift.

The Griffon had arrived ahead of schedule to the Ferelden System, a full three hours ahead and Lyla had now diverted their course to meet with another Warden Federation Ship.

The Normandy was the best scout ship the Federation had ever produced, faster than nearly any other class and invisible to most all sensors. It was the ghost of the Federation and perfect for this mission.

It was led by Captain Shepard, a woman of high stature in the Warden’s ranks, known by many as the face of the Federation. A hero, and a perfect soldier, she was a brilliant addition to her ship.

Whilst they had climbed the ranks at the same time, Lyla had never known her, apart from a few glances across the room, they moved in different circles, but the elf had a great respect for Shepard; one she hoped was returned.

The turbo lift doors hissed, and Lyla smiled as she turned, her gorgeous wife had returned. She had been working with the rest of the Morale team during the day, ensuring that the crew was in its highest spirits.

A soft hand on her cheek and Lyla’s head was tilted to meet Leliana’s lips, a kiss she didn’t realise she needed but, by the Creators was she glad for.

“I missed you,” Her wife whispered, kneeling before her. “I need to get a chair up here really, do you think there would be many protests if I got a chair by yours?”

“I don’t think they’d dare protest against me, vhenan,” Lyla giggled. “I’m the scary Captain Tempest after all.”

“Ahem,” A cough interrupted them. “Did you wake me just to watch you two kiss? Because I wouldn’t mind that but my darling Crystal might.” Isabela laughed as she leaned forward, “Oh, don’t mind me really, continue kissing.”

Lyla could feel her face heat up as Leliana began chuckling. “Oh yes, the fearsome Lyla Mahariel, what would they say if they knew how easily you blushed?” She whispered in Lyla’s long ear. “And, Bela, butt out!”

Isabela shot straight up, standing straighter than she ever had as Crystal bent over beside her, laughing hysterically.

“Anyway,” Lyla said as she stood up. “We’re meeting with the Normandy. They will be operating under us whilst in the Ferelden sector. The first reports of the attack were on the planet Ostagar, and that’s exactly where we are headed, but I’m sending the Normandy to warn Lothering. If you check the star chart, you’ll see that it is the closest planet to Ostagar.

“Isabela, I need you to take the helm now. I know you weren’t scheduled to be on for another two hours, but this is an emergency. I can only apologise,” Lyla nodded at Isabela who saluted then relieved the pilot on the opposite shift. “Ensign Cousland, I need you to prep your security team. I’m sending you down to Ostagar to investigate. I’ll have more orders once we arrive.”

Crystal saluted and with a wink to Isabela she was gone, darting into the turbo lift.

The chief scientist was the next to come to the bridge, Liara T’soni. She was one of the youngest Asari in the Federation, and one of the most brilliant. A beautiful blue creature, who’s genius was only matched by her shyness.

“Dr T’soni,” Lyla smiled as she returned the Dr’s salute. “I need you to get the science team ready. We have only heard stories of what the blight has in store for us, no concrete evidence of what the enemy even looks like. I’m sending the alpha team down to Ostagar, I want your people ready to receive bodies, materials, anything that Ensign Cousland finds.”

“Yes, Captain,” Liara saluted again. “I’ll be ready.”

“Thanks, Li,” Lyla smiled. The Asari had been with Lyla’s crew for as long as she had been qualified, and the pair had established a good working relationship.

Liara turned and went back to her science bay, leaving Lyla to chat to Leliana whilst she waited for the next officer. “Vhenan, I need you with me whilst I talk to Shepard, but after that, please go ensure that the alpha team is raring to go. They’ll need your motivation, love.”

“Anything you say, Captain,” Leliana smirked. Lyla slapped her shoulder playfully sparking a giggle from the morale chief.

Lieutenant Hawke was the final officer to arrive. “Captain,” she laughed as she arrived.

“Oh not you too,” Lyla groaned. “You’re dating my sister, Marian, knock off the Captain rubbish.”

“You know I can’t resist teasing you, Lyla,” the Security officer laughed. “It’s too easy.”

Lyla pointed a finger at Leliana, “Don’t you dare agree!” Her wife just smirked as Lyla turned back to the security officer.

“I need you to prep beta team, and ensure the rest of your department is ready for what could be our trip into an active war zone. I’m not sure what we’re going to expect, lethallan, but we need to be ready for anything,” Lyla ordered. She returned the salute that Hawke gave her before falling into her seat once more.

She sat forward, legs crossed as she rested her head on an arm rested on her knee. She adjusted her eyepatch, then spoke up. “Hail the Normandy.”

The viewing screen crackled as colour exploded across the dark space beyond them. Quickly, it formed the bridge of the Normandy, showing the handsome Captain Jane Shepard sitting opposite her.

“Captain Mahariel,” The redheaded human smiled as she spoke. “A pleasure to finally work with you. I’ve heard only good things. Where do you want my ship?”

“Nice to meet you too, Shepard,” Lyla said. “I’m keeping my ship onto Ostagar, we’re bigger and can carry more survivors, and you’re more suited to scouting, yes?”

“Aye, Captain,” Shepard leant forward as she spoke.

“I want you to fly to Lothering, the small planet closest to Ostagar. There is a small population, and if you can beat the horde there, you should be easily able to evacuate them. Nice and smooth, Shepard. I’m expecting you to be back at Headquarters with the cold ones waiting for us,” Lyla smirked. “Mines a strawberry cider.”

Shepard laughed. “Mines a whiskey, and you’re on, Mahariel. Drinks when this is over. Shepard out.”

The image dissolved into the stars and Lyla kept the smirk on her face a while longer. “Bela, take us to Ostagar.”

**OoOoO**

Three hours passed in a blur of controlled anxiety and nerves. The calm before the storm was always Lyla’s least favourite bit of a mission. Once you were there, it was easy to work out what to do, but the unknown? That was the worst.

All they knew was that reports of the Archdemon had reached the Federation. Ostagar had been attacked by it, apparently, but no one remembered how the Archdemon attacked. Or what its army looked like.

Deep down, Lyla was terrified, and a little bit excited.

“Approaching Ostagar, Captain,” Isabela grunted.

“On screen,” Lyla replied.

So this is what the blight looked like. Creators, those poor people.

Ostagar had been a beautiful Eden, green forests made up the majority of its surface, or at least that had been the report Lyla had received.

A planet full of promise, history, and life. That was what she had been expecting but, by all the gods in the universe, that was not what she saw.

The planet’s surface was blackened and grey. Where there should have been gorgeous forests, there was just rock. The oceans had dried up, and in their place was just more rock. A dead, desert, mountain. That was all that was left.

“Mythal’enaste.”


	4. Trepidation

Lyla tapped her comm badge, "Mahariel to alpha squad. Are you about ready, Ensign?"

" _Ready Captain, proceeding to spacecraft now."_

"Bela, report to the shuttlebay. If they need to make a hasty getaway I want our best pilot at the helm."

Lyla didn't miss the surprised smile to cross Isabela's features. Good, Lyla wanted her to know her captain noticed an improvement in her job performance. The woman had been due for a promotion, perhaps after the mission provided all went well.

Isabela hurried toward the turbo-lift offering her captain a salute along the way.

"Creators be with you, Bela."

OoOoO

Crystal looked up from the weapons locker as Morrigan entered the armory. She rushed into the raven-haired beauty's arms, enveloping her in the tightest of hugs before pressing a needy kiss to full crimson lips. She ignored Krem's witty remarks and kept kissing her lover. It wasn't professional to be doing that in uniform and while on duty no less but she couldn't help it, she just missed the woman so damn much. Krem was use to their behavior; he would never report them. In fact, Crystal was fairly certain he enjoyed their intimate displays as much as she did.

Pulling away gently, dark sapphires gazed deeply into golden suns, silently conveying how much the other woman meant to her.

"I've missed you, too," Morrigan whispered with a ghost of a smile.

Crystal smiled back and paused a moment, taking in her lover's beauty as she tucked a rebellious strand of dark hair behind her mate's ear. Morrigan laughed lightly before nodding to the weapon's locker behind Crystal, forcing the ensign to snap back to reality. Crystal pressed another quick kiss to the woman's lips before spinning around to retrieve a hazard suit for the Lieutenant.

Once the three of them were dressed and outfitted with weapons, Leliana walked in.

"Pleasant seeing you here, come to wish us luck?" Krem asked.

"Indeed I have, crewman. As you know, no one has yet to see these _darkspawn_. I just wanted to say I believe in each of you. Look out for one another out there. Be vigilant and remember why we're here, we serve the Grey Warden Federation, we _are_ Grey Wardens, protectors of the galaxy from any threat against the empire. Go now, my friends, I know you'll return to us victorious!"

Krem and Crystal shot a fist into the air with a war-cry before snapping their arms back to their sides. Leliana's short speech of inspiration earned a nod from Morrigan which was the closest the woman would ever come to cheering.

_Mahariel to alpha squad, are you about ready, ensign?_

Crystal tapped her comm badge, "Ready Captain, proceeding to spacecraft now."

Together, the team made their way to the shuttlebay, each giving Leliana an appreciative nod on the way out.

"Maker guide you," the redhead called after them.

The alpha squad were the first responders and scouts for these types of missions that held the unknown. Lieutenant Hawke's Beta team was a lethal fighting force for defense situations. Crystal desperately hoped they wouldn't be needed. She hoped this was going to be an easy in and out mission. Find survivors, shuttle them back to the Griffon and get some much-needed R&R with _both_ her partners. If Morrigan came on an away mission, she was bound to be relieved for twenty-four hours afterward; it was protocol.

A sinking feeling bubbled in the ensign's chest as they entered the shuttle bay. She couldn't shake it, was something bad going to happen? Just outside the shuttle she gripped Morrigan's arm. Gold orbs fell on the trembling ensign, the Lieutenant's expression turned concerned as she came to an abrupt halt and faced the brunette. Krem glanced over his shoulder to see why they stopped but continued on as the ensign nodded for him to do so.

"Crystal? What is it, love?"

"I love you so much, Morrigan." Crystal whispered before pressing a hungry kiss to the woman's lips for a long alluring moment before ripping away and continuing on, leaving a confused Morrigan behind.

Crystal was shocked to see Isabela in the pilot seat when the shuttle doors swung open. A cheesy grin pulled at her lips as she watched the sexy pilot wink at her and Morrigan. The flirty brunette patted the seat beside her for Crystal to sit. On the rare occasions Isabela came along missions, she always insisted Crystal take the chair of the co-pilot up front. With curious eyes still on Crystal, Morrigan took the seat at tactical; luckily, being chief of engineer, she could work pretty much any station and didn't seem to mind. Krem sat opposite of Morrigan at his usual console for navigation and communications.

"Everyone ready?" Bela asked, "Sealing spacecraft, opening shuttle bay doors, disengaging magnetic constrictors… and away we go. Let's go save a planet shall we?"

Krem's laugh echoed from the back as Crystal smiled again. Isabela was always witty and sarcastic; she found amusement even in the darkest of times, and Crystal loved her for it. Especially now, as the heavy disquieting feeling began to grow and flutter in the pit of her stomach. The ensign glanced down as she felt warm, caramel colored fingers interlace with hers. Isabela flashed her a smile before turning back to the console and expertly entered commands with one hand, but not before mouthing the words _I love you_.

OoOoO

"Easy as she goes, keep us in transporter range," Lyla ordered the crewman that took over the helm.

"Captain, I'm picking up a signal, but there's too much interference, it'll take some time to clear it up. Should I proceed?"

Lyla turned toward the Lieutenant-Commander, "A signal? Can you tell where it's originating from? And bloody hell woman, I told you to stop calling me captain!"

Hawke ignored Lyla's last comment and furrowed her brows in concentration. "All I know is it's in our vicinity, but something just seems… unusual about the interference. I've never seen readings quite like these."

"Keep at it then, Marian. I don't want any surprises."

Hawke's calloused fingers began to dance furiously across the console interface. Lyla turned as the turbo-lift doors hissed open. She smiled as her vhellan entered. Lyla smiled and met the gorgeous human that was her wife halfway. She hadn't been gone longer than an hour, but Lyla had already grown to miss the woman in that time.

"Have they arrived on the surface yet?" Leliana asked.

"They've just landed; they should be checking in at any momen—"

_Ensign Cousland to Griffon._

Lyla smiled, the Ensign was punctual like no other, her reliability refreshing. The captain tapped her comm badge, "Go ahead, Ensign."

OoOoO

As the shuttlecraft landed, the team stood and headed out, except for Crystal who lingered behind a moment to talk with Isabela while Krem and Morrigan began the routine of securing the perimeter around the shuttle.

"What is it, babe?" Isabela asked once she noticed Crystal was still inside. When Crystal hesitated and didn't speak, Isabela pulled her into her lap and hugged her close. "You can tell me anything," she whispered.

"I just… have a bad feeling, Bela. I think something terrible is going to happen."

The pilot cupped her lover's face in both hands and pulled their lips together in a long, soft, affectionate kiss. "Nothing's going to happen, my love. You're going to go out there, kick some darkspawn ass, and before you know it, the three of us will be back in bed celebrating another job well done."

Crystal smiled, Isabela always knew how to make her feel better. Once reassured, the ensign schooled her features back to task mode and exited the shuttle. Morrigan and Krem were already outside waiting for her.

"Perimeter secured," Krem reported.

Morrigan held out her tricorder for the Ensign to take, "there are some unusual readings in the eastern approach. They indicate a mass amount of life signs but are erratic."

Crystal looked to the ashen sky above them; an angry sandstorm had formed overhead. "Could it just be interference from the approaching sandstorm?"

"Tis what I suspected as well but if you check the base readings, the life signs are distorted beyond recognition of humanoid. 'Tis possible these are the alleged darkspawn."

"Looks like a large crowd, too many for just us. Alright, that changes things. This is a scouting mission only, now. We do not attack unless threatened; we don't want to give our position away. We are here to survey, locate survivors and report back, understood?"

Krem and Morrigan simultaneously answered, "understood."

Crystal was secretly smiling on the inside; she didn't actively seek leadership roles, but she sure did love bossing around the woman that outranked her. She'd most likely gloat about this to Morrigan later as she usually did. She and Isabela loved teasing the Lieutenant having to take orders from a lowly Ensign.

"Ensign Cousland to Griffon"

_Go ahead, Ensign._

"Captain, we have readings of darkspawn activity nearby. Permission to approach and survey."

_Permission granted, survey only. Keep your tricorders on continuous scan; I want data of what happened down there and want to know if there are any survivors._

"Understood, Cousland out."

After the comm clicked off, Crystal nodded for them to proceed. She shot a glance back toward the shuttle and pumped her fist quickly in the air, indicating for Bela to shut the doors and hold tight until they returned. She caught her lover's flirtatious wink and wave as the doors slammed shut. The Ensign took a deep breath as dread washed over her once more. She just couldn't shake the feeling something was going to go terribly wrong.


	5. The Price of Valiance

"Lyla to engineering."

_Go ahead, lethallan._

"Merbear, we have a weak signal we're having trouble deciphering. Can you clear it up?"

_Sure, just let me put it through the sub-micron scanner… alright, that's the best I can give you. Streaming the results to the Lt. Commander's station. Merrill out._

Hawke and Lyla leaned over the console staring intently at the interface as Merrill's corrections were sent to command.

"It's a distress signal." Hawke announced, clearly stunned.

"And it's the Normandy," Lyla finished.

Hawke's hands glided across the interface once more, "That's not all, our geo scans are coming through on the planet now."

"I don't give Merbear enough credit!" Lyla said, crossing her arms and shaking her head, impressed with her sister's skill.

"Lyla, it looks like an army is closing in on the alpha team."

"Hail them!" Lyla demanded.

"Can't, communications are down. Looks like interference from a storm overtop of them."

OoOoO

The alpha team reached the peak of a hill they had been hiking for the past twenty minutes. The view before them was deplorable. The lands were nothing more than rock and ash, a battlefield of bodies lay strewn across the plane lifeless, mangled and disfigured, their blood staining the soil. There must had been thousands upon thousands of them.

Past the plane lay a bridge, joining the breach between two cliffs. What looked to be a forest of rock lay on the opposite side. Beneath the overpass rested the darkest depths of a ravine, like a bottomless pit. Morrigan tapped her shoulder lightly, holding out her tricorder for the ensign to see. Whatever those distorted readings indicated, were about to make themselves known, as they were approaching their location at a rapid pace.

The gathering sandstorm overhead rolled out bolts of thunder as it began to swirl and swarm the dirt around them. The winds blew harshly against the trio as they squinted their eyes to see. They held their tricorders up, scanning and recording consistently. Fog formed around the rocks on the opposite side of the bridge, far in the distance. Crystal squinted harder as she thought she saw movement, it looked as if the ground, the planet itself was slithering. Her eyes widened in part realization, part fear that what she was seeing were hundreds, no, thousands of moving bodies.

They weren't a race she recognized, they looked to be creatures of malice and violence. Their skin twisted and distorted, the color of ash and charcoal, monsters of every size and shape stomped and plodded towards them. Ogres, skeletons, hulking bodies that seemed nothing but hunks of muscle, fire embedded in every one of their eyes with a promise to kill as they screeched and held their weapons and claws toward the sky and began marching closer.

The squad pulled their weapons from their holsters as they slowly crept backward. Crystal startled when she backed into a body and crashed to the ground. Krem and Morrigan instantly trained their weapons on the fair-haired man to have appeared out of nowhere. His armor was caked in blood, as was his beard and ponytail.

Morrigan took a cautious step forward, keeping her weapon aimed at the man while outstretching a hand toward Crystal. The ensign grasped the warm palm and allowed herself to be pulled to her feet. She stood between Morrigan and Krem before facing the soldier.

"Who are you?"

"My name is Duncan. There's a small community held up in a cave nearby. We require assistance."

Krem stepped forward, but Crystal shot an arm out halting the action. "Aren't they the survivors we were looking for?" Krem asked, eyebrows raised.

"I'm most concerned with how you were able to surprise us. Our scanners didn't register your life sign. Why?" The ensign narrowed her brows.

Duncan took a deep breath; his expression almost looked pained. "I promise to explain everything. But right now the hoard is coming. Do you have the means to destroy that bridge?"

Crystal looked him over carefully; she had no reason to mistrust him, but she couldn't help but get the feeling he was holding something back. Suspicions aside, the soldier was right, they needed to keep the hoard away from whatever survivors were left.

"Krem, run to the shuttle, grab the charges. Hurry."

"You got it boss." Krem was gone in an instant; his weapon slung over his back as he fled as quickly as his legs would carry him, which was pretty damn fast. Krem was most likely the fastest runner aboard the Griffon, he had repeatedly won the fitness challenges Cassandra, the fitness and combat trainer, had sometimes held.

Crystal waved Morrigan off; obediently the Lieutenant holstered her weapon as they waited. Krem was back with a bag of charges a short time later, breathless and drenched in sweat. Crystal took the bag; they had four to set. She handed two to Morrigan and one to Krem, she nodded and indicated with a gesture to follow her toward the bridge.

"Wait here Duncan." They were off before he could respond.

Crystal pointed where to place the charges before the trio broke apart. After Crystal attached hers strategically in the bridge's center and set the timer, she headed back for the cliff without an army of approaching darkspawn. Morrigan finished just as she arrived. Crystal wrapped her arms around Morrigan, ready for this to be over. They were almost home free.

She opened her eyes mid-hug and watched Krem struggle with his charge. Something was wrong, it was taking him too long, the darkspawn were only a few yards away, he needed to get back before the bridge blew.

Reluctantly, Crystal ripped herself away from Morrigan and charged down the bridge as a single darkspawn ahead of the swarm crept up behind Krem.

"Krem! Your flank!"

Krem whipped around, but it was too late as he took a hard blow to the head. Crystal swung her weapon around and nailed the creature right between its wide set eyes. She rushed to Krem's side who was cradling his head. Blood gushed and filtered down his face. The ensign slung his arm around her shoulders and began to head back across the bridge as the darkspawn began to close in.

"Wait! we can't go; my charge isn't set there's something wrong with the phase coil resonator."

"The other charges will have to do; it's too late. They're already on the bridge!"

"Crystal you know as well as I do if all four sections aren't destroyed they'll get through."

Crystal growled knowing he was right. Morrigan met them halfway; the ensign hurriedly transferred Krem's weight to Morrigan. "I'll meet you on the other side in a minute."

Crystal dashed back toward the device, ignoring her squad mates' protests. She seized her gun once more and fired her way through the small crowd of creatures to have approached the bridge. They dropped fast, but the thicker parts of the hoard were almost on her.

She slid to her knees, grabbing up the explosive and turning it over in frantic hands. She inhaled deeply, willing calmness to invade her. This was something she was good at. With professional composer, Crystal cracked open the device and re-circuited the flux capacitor with just a few quick flicks of her fingers. Once the device sparked to life with the correct sequence of beeps, she stuck it back to the groove of the bridge and darted back toward her team.

As she went to stand up, Crystal felt a piercing claw rip into her ankle, pulling it out from under her. She fell face first into the rock surface of the bridge. Another darkspawn hovered over her as she quickly drew her weapon and fired off two shots causing the creatures to collapse overtop her. With a twist and great effort, the ensign managed to crawl out from beneath the heavy creatures. The interaction had taken a lot of time, she had to hurry.

Her heart thundered as she limped as fast as she could down the bridge, its length was long, and she quickly grew weary but knew this was literally a race for her life. Time would undoubtedly be against her. She could see the distress in Morrigan's face, hear the fear in her shouts for her love to hurry.

Crystal suspected the creatures contained poisonous bites and scratches as fire shot up her leg. The wound screaming and screeching in agony. Her vision blurred, threatening her consciousness. But she grit her teeth and pressed on. She had to get back. She had to make it. She had two women that needed her. Relied on her to come back. She held on to Morrigan's fierce golden globes as she continued to push forward.

But all was lost when Crystal felt the spray of combusting rock fragments pierce and sting her face, and the ear-splitting blasts of the charges going off around her. Fire leaped from all directions, smoke choked her as the bridge crumbled beneath, suddenly she began to fall. Then all went black.

OoOoO

"Status?" Lyla asked worriedly.

Leliana's fingers laced between hers just then. Lyla offered an appreciative smile before turning back toward Hawke.

"The army has ceased their pursuit. I'm not sure why but I'm picking up an explosion on the surface. Could be the reason for the abrupt halt."

"And the squad?"

"There are only three life signs, Captain."

Lyla's heart dropped, she squeezed Leliana's hand tighter as she felt the blood rush from her face.

"Who is it? Which friend have I lost?"


	6. Vengeance

“No!” Morrigan shrieked, letting her heart break for just a moment as the smoke cleared. Krem began to scream as he realised what Crystal had done. That brave, foolish girl. Morrigan had loved her more than she would have ever known. Tears welled up in her eyes, but she swallowed them back. Breaking down was for the weak willed, and by any god in the universe, Morrigan was not foolish.

She could allow herself to feel when they were safe, right now she had more to worry about. One-third of her heart was lost, but Morrigan could still save Isabela.

Krem was on his knees, unable to walk from his injury and inconsolably sobbing.

“’Tis of no use falling apart now, Krem,” Morrigan whispered as she knelt beside the man. “She wouldn’t want that. She’d want us safe, she’d want us to finish the mission.”

“I…” Krem stuttered, staring at the ground a moment longer as his tears fell. “I’m sorry, Morrigan, it’s my fault.”

“’Tis no one's fault but Crystal’s. She made the sacrifice,” Morrigan pulled Krem to his feet as she spoke. “’Twas noble of her. I can say that at least. Come, we must inform Isabela and the bridge.”

“Maker’s breath,” Krem muttered, “Bela is gonna break.”

“’Tis up to us to ensure that does not happen. I will help you walk, crewman, but you will need to keep an eye out for any more Darkspawn,” Morrigan ordered.

“Aye, Ma’am,” Krem replied.

Morrigan lifted his arm over her shoulder and started them ambling towards their shuttle. Isabela would have heard the explosion by now, but if she was trying to contact them, it wasn’t getting through. The interference from the bombs could have disrupted their badges.

Her tricorder beeped, and with her spare hand Morrigan held it out. A shortcut, allegedly, back to the ship. This was the best luck she could have hoped for, and if Morrigan were in the least bit religious she’d thank the Maker himself, or the Creators. Krem was too injured to walk the way they came, but this was much shorter.

Twenty minutes later, they were back. Krem was as pale as Morrigan had ever seen and passing out may be the best thing for him. After they reach the shuttle.

Isabela came running out the shuttle as they approached. “What happened?” She screeched, panting as she ran to meet them. “Where’s Crystal? Morrigan, where is our love?”

“Bela,” Morrigan faltered. Her mask of strength was her usual face but with Isabela, it slipped easily. “Bela, she’s gone.”

Isabela fell to her knees, “No. No, no, no, no. No,” The pilot whispered. “I promised her. Oh, Maker, I promised her it would be ok.”

 Morrigan sat Krem down and knelt beside her love. “Isabela, look at me, please. We need to keep going. We can grieve when we’re safe.”

The pilot nodded once and silently got to her feet.

“Darling, I need you to help Krem, he can’t stand on his own,” Morrigan said. She allowed herself one more moment of weakness and planted a soft kiss on Isabela’s lips. It was just enough to remind her what she was fighting for.

The team piled into their shuttle. Isabela lay Krem down in the back, reaching for the emergency medkit to look him over as Morrigan went to the console.

“Away team to Bridge,” she said as she pressed down on the comms button.

**OoOoO**

“Alistair, you have the Conn,” Lyla marched off the bridge without waiting for a response. “Mahariel to Engineering. Merrill are you there?” She said as she stomped past the wary crew.

_“Lyla? What is it?”_ Merrill’s voice surrounded Lyla as she made her way through the corridors.

“For the love of the Creators, please tell me you’ve fixed the transporters?”

_“Well, they were never truly broken, Hahren, it was only interference on the planet that was stopping us from getting a lock,”_ Lyla sighed as Merrill continued over the comms. _“You see, the storm was confusing the sensors, meaning that the Heisenberg compensators couldn’t predict the beams momentum, and it’s location at the same time, a paradox you might say, but it’s quite common. I eventually managed to readjust the targeting scanners, meaning the matter stream would be able to… I’m babbling aren’t I?”_

“Merbear, you always do,” Lyla laughed. “Meet me at the transporter room. We’re needed on the planet, something’s gone terribly wrong.”

_“Aye, Captain,”_ Merrill responded.

“Deck 4,” Lyla ordered as she entered the turbo lift. Transporter rooms one and two were on this deck. As was the Morale team’s offices.

“Ma cherie,” Leliana’s stern voice echoed around the empty corridor as the doors opened. “I’m going with you.”

“It’s dangerous, vhenan,” Lyla rose her hand to cup Leliana’s cheek, staring into her wife’s gorgeous blues. “I can’t put you in harm’s way.”

“Oh? But you can go yourself?” Leliana turned away from Lyla’s hand. “You are a fool, Lyla Mahariel. Do you think you can tell me what to do?”

“I am your Captain,” Lyla began, but Leliana stared her down.

“Tais-toi,” Her wife growled. “Shut up and listen. You may be the Captain of this ship but do not ever presume to leave me out from missions with you. You may be trying to protect me, love, but I will keep you safe. You can either agree and take me with you, or growl at me and still take me with you. I don’t care which.”

“Creators, you’re adorable,” Lyla giggled. “I’m sorry, vhenan, I wasn’t thinking. Forgive me?”

“Always, you fool,” She dipped her head to reach the shorter captain, kissing her wife where they stood.

Lyla took her wife’s hand and together they walked the short distance to the transporter room.

“Mahariel to Hawke,” Lyla exclaimed as they walked. “Meet me at the transporter room.”

_“Aye aye, Captain.”_

**OoOoO**

Four bright lights appeared suddenly in the shuttle as Lyla, and her team beamed down. Lyla, Leliana, Merrill, and Hawke.

Lyla opted to not use the weapon given to her by the Federation. Whilst the phaser technology was incredible, it had its flaws; in particular against the personal shields that had become more and more common as the technology became more available. She still used a version of people’s traditional weapons, a single axe and sword. Just with some upgraded features.

The sword had a long white beam cascading and swimming over the engraved blade. A white hot laser that burned anything it touched.

The axe was her favourite.  A tiny switch on the hilt made it vibrate quicker than anyone could see, or feel but it was enough to help it cut through the strongest materials, and beam tech. It was a brutal, violent weapon and suited her perfectly.

The shield technology was impressive too, but it was flawed against slow moving objects or at least relatively slow. No matter how fast Lyla swung them, they would still pass right through the barrier.

And it made her look even more terrifying. She loved that.

Hawke kept her phaser handy, and a small knife for close quarter combat. She was quick with her weapon, quicker than most would expect from a human, and that helped her keep the surprise advantage.

Merrill carried a staff of her own creation. Designed after the stories of old, ancient witches and wizards had enraptured her youth, capturing her dreams. She could use it as a gun, shooting plasma and ice-cold blasts wherever she aimed.

Leliana was too much like her wife for her own good. A bow and daggers were her go-to weapon, not trusting the phaser tech to work when she needed it. The bow created arrows of hard light as she pulled it back, meaning she didn’t need to worry about carrying a quiver like the archers of old.

“Lieutenant,” Lyla grunted as Morrigan saluted her. “I’m beaming you three back to the ship. Work on getting the ship ready to leave as soon as possible. If Bela is up for it, I need her at the helm. There’s more trouble ahead I fear.

“Three to beam up to medical,” She spoke into her comm badge, ignoring the glare Morrigan gave her as she disappeared.

She turned to face her away team, grimacing as she allowed herself to think about what was ahead.

“We are going to kill these creatures that took one of us. Get revenge for Crystal, and learn more about them. Crystal’s body is here somewhere, we will recover it. No one gets left behind.”


	7. Tainted Love

A lone stream of light shone through a tiny crack in the rocks overhead. It shot through the little cave, beaming down to illuminate a large pile of rubble.

A mound of rocks had collapsed into a small hill in the centre of the room, directly under where the cave had collapsed after the giant explosion, directly below the bridge.

It moved, and a pale hand shot out.

“By the void,” Crystal groaned as she pushed rocks off from herself, crawling clear of the debris. “That really hurt.”

She lay back, staring at the ceiling for a moment whilst she collected her scattered thoughts.

She had survived then, presumably, or this could be a strange version of the Afterlife, but Crystal had hoped for a few more naked women and drinks when the time came. This cave must be deep in the planet then.

She reached for the comm badge, amazed that her arms still worked. Either her personal shield had protected her enough that she didn’t break a bone, or adrenaline was fuelling her right now. Both were as likely as the other.

“Crystal to the Griffon, come in, Griffon,” She cooed, unable to gain the energy to get any louder. Her only response was silence.

“Morrigan?” She whispered as loud as her voice allowed her. “Isabela? Anyone?”

The void swirled and moved around her vision, darkening the edges of her world as she tried to blink it away.

“Please,” She mumbled as her eyes darted around. “Someone help.”

The void enveloped her vision, taking Crystal into darkness as she fell back.

**OoOoO**

The world around Lyla was horrific. There were other words she could use but only in her mother tongue could she honestly relay the nature of the destruction. What should have been green rolling fields were instead burnt, smoking ash as far as her eyes could see.

If she allowed herself any weakness, she would have broken at the sight of it. Her people had an innate affinity with nature, and her ancestors wept at the horror.

She motioned to the others of her squad, telling them with hand signals to follow her and ignore the destruction around them.

Lyla led them into what used to be a village, or something similar. Where once there had been houses and community halls, now were just rubble and piles of wreckage. A park must have stood in the centre of the town, but now just fire.

“Banalhan,” She whispered. “Only shadows should live here.”

“Love, are you ok?” Leliana placed a hand on the small of Lyla’s back.

“Better than these poor souls, vhenan.” A quick look into Leliana’s eyes and her mask was back on. “The bridge where we lost Crystal should be nearby.”

She marched on, leaving the villages, and her disgust behind. She couldn’t afford to be horrified now, she had to be strong for the squad. Captain Tempest was terrifying, not terrified.

They strode into a hillside, more grey and desolate landscape as far as the eye could see.

The storm above erupted, pouring more hatred down onto the poor victimised landscape. Lyla trudged along, keeping her ears and eyes out ready for trouble.

It didn’t take long.

A quiet rumbling of the hill ahead of them made the group stop. Merrill signed to Lyla that she heard it too, a noise too low and soft for human ears, and they took positions.

A party of darkspawn crested the hill, before spilling into the valley they were in. Screams and hollers the like Lyla had never imagined.

She had been in war before but never like this.

The descriptions Morrigan had given gave the monsters no justice. A perversion of man and beast charged at them and Lyla heard herself roaring in defiance.

They would not take her, nor her family. The tempest would stand firm.

“Emma shem’nan!” She screamed as she met them, her axe catching the neck of the first creature and killing it before it had even realised. “For Crystal!”

Her group echoed her cry as they joined the battle, arrows and phaser bolts flew past her head as she rolled past monsters, spinning and slicing as she rose. They would see why Captain Tempest was feared throughout the galaxy, why she was the force to be reckoned with.

An ice bolt from Merrill’s staff hit the next monster square in the chest, freezing it and the surrounding monsters dead. An arrow from Leliana’s bow shattered it into a thousand pieces, and as Lyla stepped through the mayhem, the monsters recoiled.

She was their destruction, and Lyla laughed as her weapons met their flesh. They would pay for harming her crew. One of the creatures slashed her arm, but it only served to fuel the fury that powered her. She let herself be lost in her anger and let the red mist overcome her vision.

**OoOoO**

Crystal came too and immediately regretted it. Her body was on fire as pain shot up her legs. The damage the monsters did to her before the explosion were making themselves known, and a secret quiet part of her knew they were serious.

The rest of her was more concerned on being reunited with Bela and Morrigan.

With a groan, she sat up and slowly got to her feet. The void had given her up, and she would survive. For now.

No comms, no weapons, and no company. Crystal wasn’t in the best position of her career, but there were many worse predicaments. She could walk, and that was enough.

She leant against the cave walls and listened, the silence was deafening. She was alone, no monsters but no friends.

The cave had only one way to go, and Crystal took it gladly. Any route was better than standing still, and hopefully, this would take her back to her loves.

Her tricorder gave off enough light to make her way through the labyrinth of caves ahead, and as she walked, she almost felt happy. She had always loved the dark, more than a bright sunny day at least, this was almost paradise, just lacking in her women.

A noise ahead made her jump and immediately shut off her tricorder.

“I’m a friend,” flames licked the walls and low ceiling as Duncan stepped forward, holding a makeshift torch. “We don’t have time to waste, your friends are above, fighting the horde. Come with me if you want to live.”

**OoOoO**

“Lyla!” The mist descended and she was on her knees in the centre of the massacre. Bodies strewn around her and Leliana staring at her. “Are you ok?”

“I think so, vhenan,” the elf rose to her feet, checking her body for pain as she stretched out. Her arm hurt where a monster had cut her, but that was all. “Everyone healthy?”

“Aye,” Hawke answered. “Seems you took the brunt of their might.”

“I’m a scary girl, what can I say?” Lyla laughed, brushing off Leliana’s worried hand as she pushed forward. She would apologise to her wife later, for now, they had a job to do.

“My scans showed a cave system nearby, lethallan,” Merrill spoke up, pointed to the west. “If my scans are correct, it should lead directly under the bridge.”

“Lead the way, Merbear,” Lyla smiled.

**OoOoO**

“How did you find me?” Crystal stammered as they marched. “I thought I was lost for good.”

“I knew you were nearby,” Duncan said. “I’m tainted with their poison. It gives me some abilities that can be useful, as well as some downsides.”

“Abilities?” She gasped as pain shot through her.

“That pain is one of the early downsides, curable to an extent. If you let me and mine treat you, we can stop it,” Duncan smiled sadly to her. “I can sense the taint in you, my friend, we will need to take you through the joining soon, or it may be too late. I’m sorry, it’s a death sentence otherwise.”

Crystal gulped and kept silent. If it meant seeing her girlfriends one more time, she would walk through the void itself and fight Sithis. Whatever she had to do was simple compared to that.

“I’m afraid I never caught your name earlier, my friend, will you tell me now?”

“Crystal,” She answered solemnly.

“Can you fight, Crystal? There is something big ahead, and I fear we won’t be able to sneak past.” He passed her a weapon, a sword similar to Lyla’s own unique blade but more makeshift.

“I’ll do my best, Duncan.”

He signalled to her to stop and threw his torch around the corner. A horrific screech filled the room and shook her where she stood. Duncan smiled at her, drew two daggers and charged around the bend.

Crystal was quick behind, but the monster ahead made her hesitate for the smallest of moments.

An ogre. Horns larger than she, a body that seemed to engulf the whole cave and stare back at her.

She charged.

**OoOoO**

“I can hear fighting ahead!” Merrill shouted, letting Lyla sprint past her.

The captain roared as she led her squad through the twists and turns, letting her ears guide her as she sped towards the cave. Survivors were in this cave, Morrigan had said, Lyla had lost one crewman, she would not lose anyone else.

A gigantic crash and silence but it was close enough that Lyla knew where to go.

They rounded one more corner, and a behemoth’s body lay in the path.

With Crystal Cousland standing victorious atop it.


	8. Succumbing to Sickness

Cerulean eyes locked with Lyla's a moment, both widening in shock to see the other. But then Crystal's rolled back into her head, and she fell backward into the arms of a fair-haired man Lyla hadn't noticed. The stranger scooped Crystal up with strong arms and rushed toward the group. Lyla was about to race over to meet them halfway, but Merrill swung an arm out, halting her advance.

"Merbear? What is it?"

Merrill was staring hard at her tricorder, eyes flickering between the device and the man approaching them. "I'm not reading a life sign."

Lyla held a hand up and drew her axe, "Stay right there a moment, shem." She turned back toward her sister. "What could that mean?"

"I'm not sure, but Lyla... I'm not reading Crystal's life sign either."

Lyla trembled as rage burned through her. No. No way had she come this far; no way had Crystal survived a blast, and wandered through a cave only to die now. Tightening her grip on the axe and grounding her teeth together, Lyla stomped forward. She had no idea who this man was, but he was about to feel her wrath at whatever he did to her friend.

Gentle but firm hands grasped Lyla by the shoulders. Only Leliana had a touch that could ever calm the surge of anger to sometimes bubble through the elf.

"Wait, Mon Cherie." She whispered. "You aren't thinking clearly. There must be an explanation." Lyla let out a breath and allowed herself a moment of comfort with her lover before Merrill spoke again.

"I'm not reading your life sign either, lethallan. Everyone else is registering as normal."

"How is that possible!?" Lyla nearly shouted. What was going on? Was Crystal alive or not?

The dark haired man caked in blood stepped closer, "It is the taint. Please, I will explain everything, but we must leave now. I fear your friend has little time left before the poison takes her."

"Poison?" Lyla asked.

"Yes, from the darkspawn. A scratch or bite is all it takes; death almost always follows. There is something of a cure if administered in time. It looks you will also be needing the ritual." Dark sad eyes landed on the deep gash on the captain's arm.

Lyla was suddenly aware of the incredible agony shooting up her slashed limb. It burned and stung to no end. Ritual? Poison? Death? Creators, was this a fine day. Lyla shook her head from her thoughts. She needed a clear head; they needed to stick to the plan. They found Crystal, now they needed to get back.

"Alright, we leave now. But you will explain everything as soon as we get back to the Griffon. What's your name, stranger?"

"I am Duncan."

"Alright, Duncan, come with us. We just need to locate some nearby survivors then we can beam up together. Merrill, Hawke, after we're gone you can fly the shuttle back."

Hawke and Merrill nodded but were cut short by Duncan, "I'm afraid that won't work."

"Excuse me?" Lyla challenged.

"I think I know what he's talking about," Merrill responded, eyes still glued to her tricorder. "Technology can't read your life signs let alone establish a resequencing pattern. Teleporting isn't an option. You three will have to take the shuttle."

Mythal'Enaste. "Fine. We find the survivors then—" Lyla swayed slightly, she nearly lost her balance as several dark spots threatened her vision. She stumbled backward and almost tripped, but Leliana's quick reflexes caught and steadied her.

"Are you alright, my love?" came Leliana's smooth melodic voice.

Lyla blinked and straightened herself, sucking in a deep breath of the chilly? Air. When did it get cold?

"It is spreading," Duncan said, "the taint is slowly taking over. We must make haste."

"Alright, new plan. Merbear, Hawke, the survivors shouldn't be far. Lead them to the surface and beam back to the ship. Leliana, you stay with me. Us four are heading back to the shuttle now."

Everyone nodded. Hawke and Merrill left in the opposite direction, tricorders in hand as Lyla, Leliana and Duncan made their way back to the ship.

Lyla and Duncan had managed to evade every group of darkspawn in their path. It seemed the taint allowed them to sense the creatures. Though useful, Lyla wasn't enjoying the inebriated effects, not to mention the pain. She didn't let it show, though. Her blood began to boil, and her brain plead for rest, but she refused; pushing on toward their destination. There was a task at hand; she had to get them back. She had to get Crystal back to Morrigan and Bela. They needed one another. Lyla couldn't wait for the trio to be united.

The captain silently thanked the Creators when they finally made it back to the shuttle. Lyla and Leliana took the pilot seats up front while Duncan took a place in the chair closest him after setting Crystal down gently in the back. Lyla started the shuttle and pressed down on the comms button. "Captain Lyla to the Griffon, respond."

Static.

"Repeat, Captain Lyla to the Griffon, respond."

Leliana's warm hand covered her own just then. "Thank you, vhenan. Must be interference from the storm. Everyone hold on, it's going to be a bumpy ride."

Another dizzying wave crashed over the captain, but she kept her eyes open, grit her teeth and proceeded with the mission. Once the shuttle was sealed, they were in the air and headed back for the Griffon. Lyla wished Bela could have stayed behind to manoeuvre this storm. Lyla was certain the former pirate could have sailed through the lightning bolts with ease, unlike Lyla. She was a decent enough pilot but not a specialist like Bela. They took a few heavy hits, causing everyone to jerk left and right several times before they finally broke orbit.

Suddenly, Lyla's sensitive ears picked up a muffled almost choking sound. She glanced over her shoulder and looked at Crystal's unconscious form. Seeing the concern, Leliana squeezed Lyla's shoulder indicating she'd check on the brunette.

The captain heard Leliana gasp when she reached the back of the shuttle.

"She alright?" Lyla called back, glancing over her shoulder.

Leliana sat on the ground, cradling Crystal's head on her knees holding her face to the side as small gushes of dark crimson streamed out. Leliana shook her head, saying nothing. Lyla took in Crystal's almost lifeless appearance; the girl had always been pale, but this was a new extreme to her ghostliness.

With new determination, Lyla kicked the thrusters into high gear and raced back to the Griffon, pushing the shuttle's engines beyond advised limits. Crystal wasn't going to die today. Not if Lyla Mahariel had a say.

OoOoO

"Crewman, conduct a multi-phasic sweep of the engine's mainframe, then reroute the results to Merrill's console for analysis when she returns. After, take these charters," Morrigan handed the crewman a stack of datapads, "and divide them among the engineering crew, I want a complete report of every interface by the end of the day. If anyone needs me, I'll be seeing to the dilithium matrix in Jefferies tube fifty-three."

The crewman nodded and scurried away before Morrigan could pile any more work on him. Once she was sure the engineering crew would be busy for hours, she slipped away behind the Jefferies tube door on the main floor but didn't pursue the route to section fifty-three as she had said she would. Instead, Morrigan finally let the tears that had been stinging her eyes for the last few hours, fall. Tears streamed endlessly as her back crashed into the wall behind her, she slid to the floor, hand over mouth as she gave into the grief of her broken heart.

She cursed Crystal's heroism. She kept replaying the event over and over in her mind as she screamed for Crystal to hurry. But the ensign had been injured; she had limped the whole way. Crystal's glassy orbs transforming from determination to trepidation after realizing time had run out would forever haunt the Lieutenant.

Feeling desolate and alone, she wrapped her arms around her knees and buried her face in them as she sobbed. A weeping Morrigan was a rare sight. Only harm to a lover could warrant such displays. What was she going to do about Isabela? How could she face her? How would they ever get through this? The Lieutenant thought about abandoning her duty and heading home. Home. Was it still home if Crystal was not there anymore to make it feel like one?

_Isabela to Morrigan._

Morrigan looked up; it was her comm; Isabela sounded frantic. Long fingered hands quickly tapped her badge as she cleared her throat before speaking with a hoarse voice, "Bela? Are you alright?"

_Oh Maker, Morrigan! The Griffon just established communication with the shuttle. Crystal's on-board._

_She's hurt, but the captain is bringing her home. Our love is coming back to us._


	9. Emergency

“Love,” Lyla groaned as the ship docked in the hanger bay. “Take Crystal to the med bay, ensure Wynne listens to what Duncan has to say. He seems to know more about this taint than any of us.”

“You’re coming with us,” Leliana stated. “You’re infected too, Lyla. You need help.”

“I can wait. The Normandy is in trouble, Leli. After we save it, I can rest,” Lyla whispered. She stood from her chair with a massive groan but shot a look to Leliana to quiet any response from her wife. “This is bigger than me, love.”

“Nothing is,” Leliana argued.

“Ma serannas, vhenan. Do as I ordered,” Lyla commanded.

“Aye, Captain,” her wife spat.

Lyla grunted as she started to walk. The cold was worse up on the ship, but she had to be stronger than the others. As Captain they all relied on her, she would not let them down.

There were much more important things for her to be doing than residing in a bed in sick bay. This was one of them, and as Lyla stepped into the turbolift, she knew she had made the right decision.

“Bridge,” She growled as waves of nausea swam over her. The world shifted as she stumbled into the wall. Pain shot through her arm, her injury, and flew around her body as agony overtook her. Only by sheer force of will did she stop that red mist of anger take over.

She stepped out onto the bridge as soon as the door opened. “Captain on the bridge,” she shouted. The crew jumped but parted as she moved towards her chair.

“Crewman, why aren’t we moving?” She called out to Isabela.

“Waiting on your order, Captain,” Bela responded curtly.

“Warp speed then, let’s save the Normandy.”

**OoOoO**

War was hell, anyone who said otherwise was either a liar or a fool. Lyla Mahariel was neither, and as the ship dropped out of warp, nothing could have prepared her for the horror.

Lothering was gone. Dust and debris were all that was left of the once well-populated planet, a billion voices all silenced by a monster she had yet to even imagine.

Her vision faded for a moment, and suddenly they were closer. Isabela was expertly navigating them through the debris field, passing destruction as though it was not there.

“The Normandy's signal is just ahead, shall I put it on screen?” The crewman asked.

“Aye, Bela,” Lyla answered.

The screen flickered into life as Isabela tapped on her console.

“Mythal’enaste,” Lyla whispered. “Elgar’nan, ghilama.”

A monster was ahead. Bigger than any space station and moving like nothing Lyla had ever imagined. Its body was at least a dozen times longer than the Normandy, wings extending from it larger than any moon Lyla had ever seen. An elongated neck extended from the body of the monster, leading to a giant serpentine head. Teeth longer than her ship, gleaming with some strange power. And inside them, something worse than any of them could have feared.

The broken hull of the Normandy.

Plasma shot out from glands on its wings, propelling it forward as the dragon flapped them. It lazily glided through space ahead, ignoring the Griffon as it flew in the other direction.

A massive shockwave shot from it, and suddenly it was gone. Disappeared into warp.

“Bela, scan for life signs. Find anyone, anything out there,” Lyla growled. “Shepard is smart, she will have sent her crew out, saved them even if it meant losing her own life. She is a hero, find them.”

“Aye, aye, Mahariel,” the crewman replied.

The ship slowly swam through space, scanning every rock and meteor it passed in the vain hope of finding life.

Everything was dead. Everything was gone.

“Bela, set the scan to broad range, find me something in this system. Please,” Lyla begged.

She stood to get closer to the view screen, hoping to see anything at all. Instead, the world fell away as she finally lost the fight to stay awake. The taint was in her and not even the Tempest could fight it forever.

 

**Translations**

**Ma serannas – I’m sorry**

**Vhenan – Heart**

**Mythal’enaste – Elvish curse**

**Elgar’nan, ghilama – Elgar’nan, guide me. Elgar’nan is the god of Vengeance**

 

 

 


	10. Heavy Decisions

Bela whipped around at the sound of the heavy _thud_ behind her. Captain Mahariel had crumbled to the floor; she wasn't moving. Rushing to Lyla's side, frantic fingers pressed to the pulse point of the elf's long frail neck. The throb beneath her fingers was weak, but it was there.

"She's alive. We need to get her to sickbay." Bela looked at Alistair, waiting for the first officer to give the order to have someone take the captain to medical. But he just sat there dumbfounded, as if his brain hadn't caught up yet.

Deciding to take matters into her own hands, Bela rolled her eyes and began hoisting Lyla upright, draping one lithe arm over her thin, ripped caramel shoulders. Out of nowhere, Hawke appeared beside them, throwing the captain's other arm over her own shoulders, lightening the load considerably.

Bela nodded her thanks to the Lt. Commander and received a nod in return. Together, they half dragged half carried Lyla toward the turbolift. Bela grasped Alistair's shoulder as they passed, forcing him back to reality.

"Bridge is yours, Commander."

Alistair blinked, he looked like he had seen a ghost. "Right. Err… everyone, continue scanning for life signs."

Bela and Hawke shared a knowing look. Alistair being second in command of the Griffon was like putting a sweetcake in charge of an army; utterly useless and would be eaten alive before the day's end. But they didn't have time to deal with that at the moment. The captain needed medical attention.

As the turbolift doors hissed shut, Bela's heart beat wildly as she realized who else would be lying in sickbay. "Deck five."

She remembered the overwhelming relief that flooded through her when the Griffon had finally picked up the shuttle's signal and made contact with Lyla. From the sounds of things Crystal was worse off since she had been infected with the mysterious virus much longer.

Her worry grew as she began to buckle beneath the captain's weight. If this was Lyla after a few hours, how much trouble was her lover in? Bela shook her head, willing the thoughts away. Morrigan would say it was pointless to worry until they had all the facts, and she would be right. Taking a deep breath, Bela tightened her grip and proceeded to sickbay.

Bela's eyes immediately fell on Crystal when the doors flew open. Leliana stood beside the bio-bed talking to a burly man caked in blood; the substance also matted his dark beard and ponytail. Their arms were crossed, and they spoke intently in hushed whispers. They broke apart once they noticed Hawke and Bela carefully maneuvering the elf onto the bed beside Crystal.

Wynne, the Griffon's doctor rushed over; a medical hyper spanner already in hand and scanning for damage. "How long has she been like this?"

Bela and Hawke shared another look as Leliana pushed past them, rushing to her wife's side and grasping the elf's thin, limp hand.

"About ten minutes." Hawke offered. "She just collapsed on the bridge."

"We need to stimulate her before it's too late." The doctor's skin tone was as ghostly as her hair color. She rushed around the bay, gathering medical instruments of every sort. Her reaction was alarming.

Bela rushed to Crystal's side as the doctor gathered the necessary tools. She slipped her warm palm into her lover's, intertwining their fingers. Crystal's hand was cold, too cold. And like Lyla, she was unconscious, but something was different. Something was considerably _off_ about her inert features. Her eyes had sunken, dark circles framed them, darker than ever before. Shadowy blue, ropey veins were visible above her torn uniform, slightly wrapping around her neck. It almost looked like they were moving as if they had taken on a life of their own and were slowly slithering up their host.

Eventually, Wynne returned and pressed one of the instruments into the captain's neck, clicking the button on the device with her thumb. A quick swishing sound erupted from the device for no more than a second. Bela recognized it to be some sort of injector; Wynne had given her medication.

Lyla inhaled deeply but didn't open her eyes. Bela noticed the tears that stung the moral officer's stormy eyes as she kissed her wife's forehead. "Please vhenan, wake up my love."

Lyla groaned, but no intelligible words came out, nor did her eyes open. Morrigan walked in just then. She glanced around at the scene, observing the situation carefully before hurrying to Bela's side and draping an arm over the former pirate's shoulders. A few tears escaped Bela as Morrigan pulled the crewman into her arms.

"Any change? Has she woken yet?" the Lieutenant whispered.

Bela pulled away and shook her head before sliding onto the narrow bio-bed beside Crystal and wrapping her arms around the unconscious woman. Morrigan pulled up a chair beside the bed and wrapped her arms over both horizontal women.

"Neither will wake for some time, I'm afraid," Wynne announced to the room. "Morrigan and Isabela, this man is Duncan; he's from the surface. He's told Leliana and myself that he is familiar with the lethal disease taking over Crystal and Captain Mahariel. He calls it _the taint_." Wynne crossed her arms and narrowed her brows as if she was slightly bitter about what she had to say next, "He believes he can stave off the disease by pouring some sort of blood down their throats. He calls it a _blood ritual_. Let me be sure to add he will not allow me to analyze the substance he claims to be something of a cure."

The man named Duncan looked angry with how the doctor spat the words. "There is no other way," he insisted. "Without drinking the blood, they will surely die."

"What do _you_ suggest, doctor?" Morrigan asked.

Wynne relaxed ever so slightly when someone asked for her opinion. "A blood transfusion. I don't believe there's a way to eradicate the disease completely, but I believe a transfusion is the best way to proceed and will save their lives. I'm leaving the choice to the spouses of the patients, but you must make the choice immediately."

"Blood ritual." "Blood transfusion." Bela and Morrigan replied simultaneously. Bela held Morrigan's fierce glare with one of her own.

"You two discuss. Leliana? How shall we proceed with Lyla?"

"I will listen to Duncan on this. I'm sorry doctor, I believe it is what she would want for herself."

Wynne rolled her eyes and sighed. Sympathy fell over Duncan's features as he began to speak, "I must prepare. Is there a place I can meditate?"

"Of course," Leliana said, first placing a kiss to Lyla's forehead and whispering something into the pointy ear before stepping toward Duncan. "I'll show you to your quarters." The morale officer stopped short as she glanced between Lyla, Hawke, Morrigan and Bela. "Who's commanding the bridge?"

"Alistair," Hawke responded.

Leliana was not subtle with the roll of her eyes and facepalm as she muttered, "Oh Maker, guide us all."

Hawke failed to hide a laugh as Leliana faced her, "Marian, please show Duncan to his quarters so he can prepare. Then return to the bridge immediately. I'll be relieving Alistair of command."

Hawke let out a breath of relief, and together the trio left sickbay, Leliana heading in the opposite direction.

Bela scooted up the bed, lifted Crystal and shimmied behind her, wrapping a leg and both arms around the other brunette. She closed her eyes and nuzzled into the unconscious woman's neck; she wished desperately for her lover to wake; she wanted all of this to be over.

"Morrigan, even Leliana is going with Duncan's suggestion! He's familiar with this _taint_. He knows how to stop it."

"'Tis a ritual, Bela! There is no guarantee. Wynne is a specialist in the medical field and believes she can save our love's life. 'Tis logical, safer, and honestly love, 'tis downright smarter."

Bela's jaw dropped. Her words hurt. But she knew they were both just frustrated and angry. They both just wanted Crystal to be okay again. But neither truly knew the correct course of action. It was really no different than flipping a coin.

Wynne shuffled her feet and cleared her throat, causing both women to look up. "I'm going to run a comparison blood analysis to see which crew members are compatible donors in case you choose to go the medical route."

Both women nodded, Wynne rushed away from the uncomfortable argument. Morrigan's firm hands gripped Bela's shoulders, "Please, Isabela. I love her too. I want her back just as badly. I just want to take care of my family. Please let me do that. The transfusion is safer; it will bring her back; just let me show you."

As more tears silently cascaded caramel cheeks, Bela nodded and allowed Morrigan to press soft, supple lips to her own. As she hugged Crystal's lifeless body to her chest with one hand, she allowed the other to slip behind the Lieutenant's neck, pulling her impossibly closer. Kissing her impossibly deeper as the weight of this decision settled over them both. When they finally broke apart, tears stung Morrigan's eyes too.

"Wynne?" Bela called.

Wynne returned a moment later, "Yes? Have you two decided?"

Bela tried to answer, but her voice caught. Morrigan's warm hand gripped her own as the raven haired woman answered for her.

"We're going with the blood transfusion."


	11. The Dragon's Maw

“Bridge,” Leliana growled. Her mind was a whirlwind of activity as thoughts of her wife’s pale face raced through her mind. She had to keep busy, if she stopped, she would not be able to continue.

In her youth, Leliana had been a wild card, working for both the Chantry on her planet, and for a spymistress. She had enjoyed both jobs, but only one methodology served her now.

Marjolaine, the Spymistress, had taught her to hide her emotion, and for all the hurt and pain that bitch gave her, that lesson was valuable.

She was once the Nightingale, not just Leliana, and right now, she needed to be that woman once more.

Lyla had saved her from that life after Marjolaine had betrayed her. The Elf had protected her when no other would. Lyla had become her rock, but she couldn’t help Leliana now.

She stepped out the turbolift a new woman, or rather her old persona. The Nightingale was reborn.

“Alistair,” She spat as she reached the central chair.

The First Officer jumped and span, facing her as he got up from his seat. “Leliana? How is she?”

“Lyla is not good, Alistair, and honestly, neither is the Griffon with you in charge. Alistair, relinquish the conn to me, I will be a better leader than yourself, and surely you know this?” She stepped closer to him, within his personal space and grinned the wolf’s grin she admired so much from her wife.

“Be gentle, Leliana,” Alistair laughed, trying to take attention away from the blush forming on his cheeks.

“No, Alistair. Everyone here is treading on eggshells to not say what they want. I am the only one brave enough to tell you the truth. Alistair, you have been my friend for a long time, and one of Lyla’s best friends, but you put it best, ‘bad things happen when you lead.' Please, mon Ami, let me take charge,” Leliana sat on the Captain's chair as she spoke, looking up at him as she made her speech.

“I…” Alistair slumped. “You’re right, Leliana. Thank you. I stand relieved.”

“Leliana has the Conn!” An officer shouted from behind her.

“Mon Ami, I love you like a brother, please don’t forget that. I think you would be helpful with Marian and Duncan. Go find them,” Leliana crooned.

He nodded and left.

“Bridge to Hawke,”

_Here,_ came the woman’s response.

“Keep an eye on Duncan’s quarters. If he needs anything at all, you get it. Lyla’s life is in our hands, I won’t risk anything.”

_Aye, sir._

“Ensign,” She called out to the pilot. “Find me something.”

“Aye, sir,” the pilot responded.

**OoOoO**

Hawke stood alone outside Duncan’s quarters. He had brought all different vials of blood, strange coloured liquids, and bones. She had decided against going in.

She instead stood outside, staring at the grey, lifeless walls of the corridor, boring but a lot less likely to freak her out. Not that she was averse to gore or anything of the ilk, she just preferred to avoid it where possible.

She wasn’t afraid if it, no sir.

“Hawke to Engineering,” She whispered into her combadge. Loneliness had finally kicked in after a record five minutes. Hawke was a social butterfly, and the monotony of standing still was driving her insane.

_Merrill here, what’s up, love?_ her girlfriend’s voice came through.

“I’m so bored,” she grumbled. She began to pace up and down the corridor as she spoke, ignoring the strange chanting coming from Duncan.

_You do realise we are both on shift right now, yes?_ Merrill giggled.

“Yes… and if Lyla finds out you can apologise for me,” Hawke smirked. “What’s the point in dating the Captain’s sister if I don’t get some bonuses from it?”

_Hawke!_ Merrill laughed, and Hawke could just imagine the blush of her lover and that delicious smile. _You’re so bad!_

“You love it, vhenan,” Hawke said. She sat beside the wall opposite the room. This was a useless post, Duncan didn’t need guarding, and he wasn’t a prisoner, but Leliana had ordered it, and if anyone scared her, it was her.

Leliana seemed all innocent and pure, but Hawke had known her for a long while, and she knew about her past. The Nightingale had been the terror of a lot of people, and Hawke did not want to get on her bad side.

Their enemies had no idea that the Morale officer was the most dangerous person on the ship, not the battle-scarred, angry Captain Tempest. Lyla was the nice one, amazingly.

_I love you,_ Merrill burst out. _So much, my dear. Always distracting me when I’m low._

“It’s my job, Mer,” Hawke replied earnestly. “Lyla will be fine, my love. Duncan’s doing some weird, freaky ritual now. He knows how to save her. I trust him. I love you too.”

_You’re with him now?_

“Andraste’s sweaty knickers, no way. The amount of blood and stuff he brought in with him? No, thank you. I’m staying out in the hall where it’s clean and sterile thank you very much,” Hawke babbled.

_The high and mighty Hawke, Champion of Kirkwall, stopper of a Qunari invasion, scared of blood. Mythal, what a brave warrior_ , her lover teased.

“Oh shut it you,” Hawke laughed. “You know I hate that name.”

When Hawke was a teen, she had led a small resistance party, including both Merrill and Isabela, to fight against an invasion force on the planet they were living on. The Qunari were a warrior like race, and they had had a personal affront against Kirkwall.

She had stopped it, and the planet, as well as the whole Free Marches system, heralded her as the Champion.

She hated it.

_You’re a hero, my love,_ Merrill crooned. _My gorgeous hero._

Now it was her turn to blush. “Charmer.”

_I learnt from the best, Marian,_ Merrill giggled.

Footsteps from her right made Hawke stand to attention and place a hand on her phaser. “Who’s there?”

“Alistair,” the voice replied, and soon after Alistair stepped round the corner. “Leliana took charge and told me to help Duncan. Where is he? I thought you were with him.”

“Oh, err,” Hawke mumbled. “Yeah, he’s in there. I told him I’d give him space. I’m sure he’d appreciate you helping him, though!”

“Oh? Ok, thanks, Hawke.”

Alistair stepped past her, and the door shot open, Hawke popped her head in and immediately regretted it.

A giant goblet sat in the middle of the room, filled with a horrible dark red liquid. Duncan was covered in some strange blue dust, and blood streaks on his face and clothes.

She paled, and turned away. Alistair hesitated but a quick shove from Hawke, and he was in. She could apologise later.

“Maker’s breath.”

**OoOoO**

A screech was barely audible over the howl of the wind through the trees. Giant, amber leaves blocked the way as she struggled to get to her feet.

The forest had been her childhood home, and usually gave her a sense of self and safeness, not now.

Something was out there, something just close enough that she could practically feel its ghost on her skin, the hair on her arms stood on end and she reached for her weapon.

Nothing. She didn’t have anything on her belt. She was unarmed, and practically defenceless. She reached to switch her personal shield on, and as she expected, that too was gone.

Something was out there hunting her, and despite all of her skill, she was scared.

She crept closer to the trees, hoping to see any sign of the monster stalking her before it saw her but there was nothing but stillness past them.

She clambered up the tree, hoping to at least get a good view of it, any sign of what was chasing her would calm her.

Higher and higher she rose, slowly grabbing each branch as though it would transform before her very eyes. She was delusional with fear, and couldn’t help the panic that began to form in her chest.

A beautiful bird’s call began to fill the area, slowly at first, merely as loud as a fly’s buzz but before she realised it, it was all she could hear.

One more branch, and she was at the top of the tree, staring above the forest and at the dark, stormy clouds.

The song grew louder and then a growl from directly behind her.

She turned, and found herself staring into the gaping maw of a dragon.

The dragon. The monster that destroyed the Normandy with ease.

She screamed, let go of the branch and Lyla Mahariel fell shrieking.


	12. Forever Ailed

Morrigan's heart began to race as a series of unpleasant alarms reverberated through the air. Gold orbs snapped to the interface panel over Crystal's biobed, but her vitals were normal. That's when several jerking movements caught the lieutenant's eye. Lyla's unconscious form twitched erratically, her teeth clenched tight together as an ear-splitting shriek escaped her lips.

Instinctually, Morrigan squeezed Bela's shoulder reassuringly as they watched Wynne rush to the elf's side, injector in hand and pressing it to the fiery captain's neck with practiced finesse. But there was no relent; Lyla kept thrashing wildly. Something was wrong.

Morrigan stood from her chair and hurried toward the distressing scene unraveling before her, "How can I help, Doctor? Tell me what to do."

"She's convulsing. I don't understand. She shouldn't be showing any sign of brain activity after what I just gave her. Hold her shoulders down while I grab a—"

Just then, sickbay's doors hissed open causing Wynne to stop mid sentence and gape at the frightening blood-soaked image that was Duncan stepping through the doorway, Hawke and Alistair in tow. The sticky crimson streaking his face seemed to lay in a design of some sort, something tribal was Morrigan's best guest. Her eyes fell to the large golden goblet in his hands and relief flooded her that the vile looking liquid would not be gracing her lover's mouth. The longer she gawked at Duncan, the more confident she felt about the transfusion. She glanced toward Bela who seemed to be having a similar reaction.

"It is time," he announced.

Duncan ambled over to Lyla and motioned for Wynne and Morrigan to move away. Wynne hesitated, it was apparent she cared about the elf, but there was nothing she could do if Leliana wished for the ritual treatment against her advisement. Morrigan gently grasped the older woman's elbow and pulled her away.

Morrigan retook her place in the chair beside Crystal and Bela as they watched the ritual unfold. Wynne stood at the foot of the biobed, arms crossed as she surveyed Duncan's treatment with obvious concern.

Lyla let out another long shrill shriek as Duncan held the goblet high over her chest with both hands. He muttered a few words in an unknown dialect before dropping an oversized palm to the captain's chest and pushing her harshly down against the table.

Lyla continued to struggle as Duncan lowered the goblet to resistant lips. The crimson liquid spilled across ivory cheeks as the elf continued to put up a fight unconsciously. Duncan slid the hand holding Lyla down up to her jaw, gripping it firmly and slowly forced the liquid down her throat until her body stiffened and went limp.

"It is done."

OoOoO

Leliana nearly jumped out of her seat when she heard the turbolift doors hiss open behind her. She had been anticipating news of her wife's condition all day. Dread filled her as she stood from the captain's chair and faced Hawke.

"Well? How are they?" Leliana was sure to keep her composure as she mentally prepared for the worst. Crystal and Lyla were undergoing two entirely different methods of treatment; although she desperately wished for both women to prevail, she hoped she made the right choice for her wife.

Hawke motioned her head toward the captain's ready room; Leliana quickly nodded and led the way. Tears stung the former nightingale's eyes as another wave of dread washed over her, but she refused them. She needed answers first.

Once the doors closed behind them, Leliana sat at Lyla's desk and waited for Hawke to speak.

"She's fine. Whatever Duncan did seems to be working as far as the doctor can tell. Wynne said her blood is more tainted than before but has somehow stabilized itself. She has Lyla under constant watch and says she should wake in a few hours. Oh, and Wynne was sure to mention Lyla is not _cured_ as much as she has a condition that will need constant monitoring. Wynne also said there will almost inevitably be side effects which we have yet to determine."

Leliana smiled and hid her relief before asking, "Side effects?" Hawke shrugged. "And Crystal? How is she fairing?"

Hawke crossed her arms and looked away a moment. Leliana knit her brows together as the all too familiar feeling of dread settled over her once more.

"The doctor found two compatible blood donors. They're in sickbay now. The transfusion is underway."

Again, Hawke looked away not meeting the red head's gaze. The Lt. Commander had always been terrible at keeping information from Leliana. "What is it, Marian?"

Hawke shuffled her feet before finally finding Leliana's ocean blues again, "It may be too late for her. She's in a coma, and according to Wynne, she won't be waking up anytime soon."

Leliana straightened, schooled her features and steeled her nerves before replying, "Thank you, Marian. You may go. You have the bridge until further notice."

Hawke nodded and hurried out of the room. Just for a second, Leliana's mask slipped, and a single tear escaped her. A single tear that would have to represent both relief for her wife, and grief for her friend as she would only allow one drop its freedom.

Wiping the droplet away, Leliana stood and moved to her private worship area, got to her knees and prayed for the strength to get through the days to come. For surely, they would be difficult ones.

"Maker above, hear my words and guide me through these darkened days. Steel my heart through ache and strife. Light my path and air my breath, so I may not falter. Spare my wife from the pain of the tainted clutches of evil to befallen her, judge her worthy of your holy protection. Shield this ship, our home, our sanctuary with your unrivalled power and cleanse us all with your white flame. Save my friend so she may rise to fight this new wickedness at her family's side."

When Leliana finished, she rose to her feet and headed straight for sickbay to be with the woman she loved most.

As the doors slid shut behind the nightingale, her breath caught as she took in the saddening display. Wynne was off to the far end of the room typing away at a console, the dark circles under her eyes indicating it had been some time since she had last slept.

Crystal was as Hawke had said, comatose. She didn't move. Leliana couldn't even see a steady rise and fall of her chest. Several tubes hooked around her; one had been placed down her throat while others linked between her left arm and a machine beside the bed.

Judging by the crimson bags hanging nearby, this was the blood transfusion. Leliana's eyes followed along the tiny plastic cylinders as black liquid left one tube and rich crimson entered Crystal's lifeless form through another.

As she stepped further into the room, Leliana gasped. She had thought Crystal was an unhealthy shade of white before, but it was nothing compared to this, this was the color of death. Stormy orbs fell over the ominous blue veins wrapping themselves around the girl's neck. She quickly glanced to Lyla on the bed beside the ensign's. Although a little pale, her wife looked no different than when she usually slept.

Perhaps Crystal's color just looked worse with the caramel pirate cuddled around her on the narrow bed. Isabela was fast asleep, spooning the unconscious ensign and holding on tight as if someone might steal her. Morrigan too had fallen asleep by the bedside, draped over the other two sleeping women with her head using Isabela's stomach as a pillow. Jet black hair fell from an unkempt bun and sprawled across the pilot as the lieutenant's slender arms too held tightly onto Bela.

Leliana had never met three women so close, so in love and protective of one another. She had thought such a relationship was a thing of fairy tales until she met the trio.

Not wasting another second, Leliana hurried to her love's side, checking her over for the same alarming veins she saw on Crystal's neck. But there was nothing to be found. Silently thanking the Maker, Leliana enveloped her wife in the tightest of hugs and kissed her cheek. Lyla let out a low growl and nestled her face into the red head's neck causing Leliana to chuckle. She would never get over her wife's adorableness when she slept.

_Hawke to Leliana._

Leliana sighed and tapped her comm badge, "Go ahead, lethallan."

_We've located the escape pods of the Normandy and are bringing them aboard now._

She didn't know how exactly, maybe it was the hitch in the Lt. Commander's breath, but Leliana had an uncanny gift to read others. And her gift was telling her Hawke was holding something back.

"What is it, Marian?"

She heard Hawke let out a long breath before replying.

_We have a visual of Commander Shephard on long range sensors. She's hurling toward an M-class planet, and her air supply has been compromised. She's too far to transport. There's nothing we can do._

Leliana closed her eyes and swallowed as she searched herself for the strength to give the order. A second tear escaped her that night as she opened her lips to utter, "Turn off the view screen, Commander."


	13. High Overhead

A series of beeps kept her awake as she slowly drifted away from her ship. The Normandy had been her baby, and Shepard had loved her like she was family, which in a way she was. Normandy had been her home for the past five years, and Jane Shepard couldn't imagine life without her.

Now all that was left was the small debris that the dragon had left. It had come from nowhere, sent no hail and attacked before they could react. She barely got her people onto their life rafts before she set the ship on a collision course, hoping to do as much damage as she could before too late.

It hadn't even phased the monster. It didn't even fucking flinch. Her baby was dead, her crew scattered, and Shepard was drifting towards the planet below, Lothering. Her shields were strong enough to have her survive the fall if she was lucky.

Her main worry was the lack of thruster power in her jet pack, and what she was about to crash through.

A micro-meteor field orbited the planet, not enough to bother any decent sized ship, but Shepard was no ship. Her shields were designed to stop fast moving particles, the meteors would not be quick enough to hit the shield, but just fast enough to pierce her suit.

In other words, she was fucked.

"Captain's log," her mic clicked on as she spoke. "Stardate whatever it is. This is the end for me, my friends. All of you listening, because obviously, my death will have a crowd somewhere," she spat. Her sarcasm was usually her sharpest weapon, but now she was turning it on herself.

"I failed. That's all there is to it, and now I'm going to die. My crew is safe, thank the Maker, God, Creators, whatever big idiot is up there watching and laughing at me."

Something flew past her head as she entered the field, dangerously close to her helmet. She screamed, unashamedly. She no longer had to be strong for her crew, she was alone in the universe now, for the rest of her no doubt short, painful life.

"If by some chance someone gets a hold of this log, which I doubt since I'm not actually recording; just talking to myself like a God-damned idiot. Fucking hell, Jane, don't be such a baby. You're dead, yeah, but who fucking cares? You saved your god-damn crew. You're dying a hero, Shep," she laughed. "Well, at least no one will know I talk to myself."

Something smashed into her arm, shooting straight through and out the other side.

"ALERT. OXYGEN SUPPLY DEPLETING RAPIDLY," her suit AI shouted in her ear.

"I fucking guessed," Shepard sighed. "Captain's log supplemental. I'm dead. Fuck."

She screamed once more, then waited for the alarm to tell her what she already knew. Lack of oxygen wasn't the worst way to go. It'd hurt less than smashing into that planet at least.

She drifted on until she slowly fell asleep.

**OoOoO**

Leliana stomped her way back onto the bridge, sitting in her wife's usual chair without a word. She pressed the small button on the side of her chair and spoke, "This is Leliana speaking," her voice resounded throughout all the decks. "The crew of the Normandy is boarding our ship as we speak, I believe we have them all aboard now. Normandy crew, if you can hear me, I am sorry. This is a thankless task that no one will ever be grateful towards you for, and I'm afraid to say that Jane Shepard has paid the greatest price. We have lost a great Captain, and one of your family today. Take your time mourning her, our Captain will speak with you when she is well."

She steeled herself as she imagined the poor crew in the cargo deck below, crying for their lost captain, and some small selfish part of her was just glad that Lyla was safe.

"Crewman," she spoke up. "Take us to that planet. I want to recover Shepard's body, she deserves a hero's burial. The Maker will look at her with kind eyes."

"Aye, ma'am," the helmsmen replied.

"Reporting for duty, ma'am," Hawke spoke up as she stopped beside the security desk.

"Do a scan of the planet. I believe this is Lothering, yes? I need signs of Darkspawn and whatever threats there are to an away team. Next, find me where Shepard will land," Leliana turned as she ordered Marian. "Next, I need you to assemble a team to recover her body. I will not leave her behind."

Hawke was silent as she worked, random beeps and whines from her console as she pressed random buttons.

"She's going to crash land into the biggest continent on the planet, missing what looks like the most major populated areas. However, I see a massive horde of darkspawn nearby. They may be alerted." Hawke eventually explained. "I recommend three of us beam down to find her. Two can keep the darkspawn away whilst the last scans for her body. It's going to be risky, but that's how I would do it."

"ALERT, TOXIC CLOUDS PRESENT. UPPER ATMOSPHERE POISONOUS, TRANSPORT LOCK UNSTABLE," the ship's computer shouted.

"well, there goes that idea," Leliana sighed. "Ok, take Merrill, Alistair, and a shuttle, and find her. Do not endanger yourself, Hawke, I don't want to lose anyone else."

"Aye, ma'am."

**OoOoO**

The away team stood before their shuttle and Hawke looked upon them with a grimace. This was a stupidly difficult mission ahead. They had only faced the darkspawn once before, and it caused two of her crew to be tainted, or whatever it was that was wrong with them.

They were looking for a needle in a haystack, but fortunately, Merrill was a goddess with her tricorder, and a needle was easy for her to find.

"Friends," Hawke started as they boarded the shuttle. "Quick in, quick out, that's how I want this to go. If we see the darkspawn, we hide. I am not letting us die to find a dead body. Our safety is my priority."

"Excuse me," A voice entered the shuttle, and Hawke turned to look for its owner. Duncan stepped on, wearing his own armour and shield, cleaned up from the ritual before. "I would like to accompany you. I know the darkspawn better than anyone, I can help."

"Agreed, my friend," Hawke answered. "We could use all the help we can get."

She sat down, Merrill beside her, and began to do her pre-flight checks. The shuttle was their lifeline now, their only escape from the hell below. It had to be in perfect working order.

"Hawke to Bridge," She said into her combadge. "We're all ready to go down here."

 _Maker's speed,_ Leliana replied. _We will keep an eye on our scanners up here, and keep you informed. In War, Victory. In Peace, Vigilance._

"In Death, Sacrifice," Hawke finished. "Let's hope it doesn't come to that though."

**OoOoO**

A scream echoed throughout deck five, swarming from the sickbay and bouncing around the corridors.

Lyla was waking up.

Fire flowed through her veins, agony shot through her, and all she could see was black and stars. She screamed again, pulling against the restraints that tied her to the medical bed. Blood flowed from her mouth as she roared in rage.

"Ir halam!" She shrieked. "End it, Creators, please!"

Voice by her side didn't even register as Wynne tried her best to comfort her.

She barely felt the needle slip into her arm, but the cold calmness that emanated from it was a welcome relief. Slowly, the fire was extinguished, and she began to feel anything but pain.

"Ma serannas, lethallan," She sighed happily. "What happened?"

"You have the same taint as Crystal, Lyla," Wynne stammered. "Leliana told me to let Duncan treat you. I don't know the effects yet, so until I say, you are on medical leave."

"Ok," She giggled. The world was fuzzy, and she was floating on a sea of happy. "Where is ma vhenan?"

"She's on her way, Captain," Wynne smiled. "I alerted her as soon as you woke."

The door hissed open, and before Lyla could turn to look, arms were around her. "Maker's breath, I was so worried. I love you so much."

"I love you too, Leli-jelly," Lyla snickered. "My lovely Leli. I'm so lucky."

"Wynne," Leliana looked up from her wife. "What is wrong with her?"

"She's on very strong pain killers, Leliana," Wynne laughed. "It'll be a while till she's back to normal. Enjoy this whilst you can."

"You're so bloody cute, my love," Leliana giggled as Lyla reached for her face. "Thank you, Wynne, I'll call you if I need anything."

_**Translations** _

_**Ir halam – I'm finished** _

_**Ma vhanan – My heart** _


	14. Call to Arms

Leliana chuckled and shook her head as she hugged and kissed Lyla once more and urged the wobbly slurring elf back to sleep. Surprisingly, Lyla slipped right back into the realm of dreams without a fuss. The redhead turned at the sound of the medical bay's doors hissing open behind her.

An older woman with silver chin-length hair entered the room; judging by her attire, she had been a former member of the Normandy. Leliana let out a sad sigh at the thought of _former member_. The woman wore a grim expression, one full of contrition and pain.

Leliana squeezed her lover's thin fingers reassuringly once more before standing and turning to greet the shipwreck survivor.

"Hello, I am Leliana Mahariel, Acting Captain until my wife is well enough to return to duty. You may just call me Leliana. You are from the Normandy crew, yes?"

A slow nod was received as Leliana reached out to shake the visitor's cold frail hand, her grip was loose and lacking, the nightingale could somehow feel the sorrow pulsating through the grief-stricken woman.

"I am Dr. Chakwas. On behalf of the Normandy crew; thank you, for coming back for us. We are ready to serve at your command."

Leliana nodded. Her heart broke once more at the sight of the distraught doctor who was trying her hardest to keep her wit about her. "How are the others?"

The doctor cast her gaze to the floor before taking a deep breath and turning back to Leliana, still not quite meeting the nightingale's eyes. "Morale is at an all-time low as you can perhaps imagine. Captain Shephard inspired every soul aboard her ship and was a friend to many of us. The senior officers among the crew are ready to serve right away, including me."

"Thank you, Doctor. I do happen to be in need of officers. I'll head to the cargo bay now. If you would like, I can introduce you to Dr. Wynne and see if she has a task for you."

"I can introduce myself. You should speak to the Normandy crew."

And with that, the women parted ways, each heading in the opposite direction. Leliana's heart ached for the doctor, the pain in Dr. Chakwas chocolate orbs were afire with devastation. Captain Shephard had meant a great deal to the physician. Would every member of Shephard's crew be that emotionally crippled? She certainly hoped not.

When the cargo bay doors slid open, Leliana had her answer. The scene before her revealed twenty of the gloomiest faces she had ever seen. Remembering she needed to be strong and motivate these people, Leliana schooled her features and bravely stepped inside the airy room. It was too silent for how many people occupied the space; it was maddening. All heads faced her, watching and waiting for new leadership.

"I am Leliana Mahariel, acting Captain of the GWS Griffon. My wife, Captain Lyla Mahariel is unable to return to duty for the time being so you will take orders from me. I know you all have just suffered a great loss; Captain Jane Shephard was a gallant hero, a fearless leader, and from what I understand a fierce, fierce friend. It pains me to request further of you in your time of mourning, but the Griffon is in need of capable officers. The darkspawn have touched and shaken many of our crew, they have left their mark on us and many of our own are nearly paralyzed with loss as well. I implore the bravest among you to volunteer. I need a tactics officer, a pilot, engineers, and someone to step in as first officer until the former personnel are able to return to duty."

A brief eternity passed before a slim man with a blue SR2 cap, and scruffy face raised to his feet, met Leliana's gaze and brought his hand to his brow in a salute. "Flight Lieutenant Jeff Moreau, I'm a damn fine pilot and am yours as long as you need me."

Leliana smiled and nodded, "Thank you, Mr. Moreau, please head to the bridge on deck one."

"Call me Joker," Joker winked as he wobbled by and left the bay.

The nightingale silently thanked the Maker as several more men and women stood to volunteer.

"Miranda Lawson, Biotic Intelligence Science Engineer, I was Shephard's second in command and will willingly serve the Griffon as needed."

"Tali'Zorah Nar Rayya, engine room specialist. I also volunteer the engineers to have kept the Normandy in pristine shape under my supervision, Ken and Gabby."

A brunet and blonde got to their feet beside the suited quarrian and nodded toward Leliana before following Tali out of the bay and heading for engineering.

"Specialist Samantha Traynor and comm specialist. I am also well versed in tactics and navigation and will happily serve for your tactics station."

In a matter of minutes, Leliana's bleak world had brightened considerably. Lyla was alive and going to pull through. The survivors of the Normandy were pulling themselves together, and all stations throughout the Griffon were filled with capable officers. Things couldn't have gone better, then why did she have a heavy weight in the pit of her stomach? Why did it feel as though a storm was on the horizon?

OoOoO

Hawke was easy on the thrusters as she gently guided the shuttle through the planet's atmosphere. They hit some bumps and mild turbulence, but that was to be expected when transitioning from space to climate. Still, the jolting of the shuttle didn't help the nerves swirling in Hawke's gut.

Thankfully, Merrill's long warm fingers slipped between hers at just the right moment. The elf always knew just when Marian required a reassuring touch or calming subtle glance across a room. She loved the woman to no end and always would. Hawke vowed never to let her come to harm.

"Engaging magnetic constrictors," came Merrill's adorable timorous voice.

Reluctantly, Hawke detangled her fingers from her lover's and input the commands needed to land the shuttle safely. With one final judder, they were landed. Hawke cut the engine as the team stood to head out. Alistair pressed a series of buttons on his console before the door flew wide open.

Hawke didn't know what to expect, but she certainly wasn't expecting a clear sunny day in an untouched field. Hadn't darkspawn overtaken Lothering? No sign of life was to be seen, just vast plains of endless fields in all but one direction. Hawke faced the only obstacle ahead with a hand to her brow to shield the bright sun from her eyes. A large rock wall laid a few hundred feet in front of them; it's height reaching not much higher than the shuttle. They could probably even climb over it.

"I've resequenced my tricorder to zone in on Shephard's reflector array."

Hawke was sure Merrill just said something brilliant but asked for clarification anyway; "Uhhh, reflector array?"

Merrill giggled that precious giggle of hers. "It's something carefully merged into N7 armor with personal shielding capabilities. The array in the lining is designed to stay in tact and give off an automated distress signal when… well… when it's in distress."

"You're brilliant, Merrill," Hawke stated before pressing a quick kiss to Merrill's blushing cheek, eliciting yet another laugh from the loveable elf.

"Err, if you two are all done with the lovey-dovey perhaps we could you know, carry on with the mission? I'd rather not become a darkspawn steak sandwich for dinner." Alistair visibly shivered as he checked over his shoulder for the dreaded darkspawn.

"Do not worry, Alistair." Duncan began, resting a large hand over Alistair's shoulder. "I will sense any darkspawn nearby. They will not take us by surprise."

"Ohhhhh great," Alistair replied, his tone dripping with sarcasm.

"See Alistair? You'll get to know first before you're turned into that sandwich." Laughed Hawke.

Merrill joined in the laughter, even Duncan chuckled. The humor was welcomed and did a lot of good to ease Hawke's nerves as the group trudged on toward the stone wall. Everything was going to be okay. All they had to do was find the body and fly back.

What could go wrong?


	15. Her Elf, Her Treasure

Hawke smiled to herself as she took Merrill’s hand. Yes, they were on a darkspawn infested planet, yes they were searching for the remains of Captain Shepard, and yes Hawke should be terrified for her life, but honestly, she was ecstatic. It was sunny, warm, and smelt of flowers and this was the closest to a date they had had for months.

“I love you,” Hawke whispered as she slowed them down, letting Duncan and Alistair walk ahead of them. “So much, Mer.”

“Love you too, Hawke,” her elf giggled, blushing that adorable blush as her ears reddened.

She pulled Merrill in close as they walked, delighting in how warm the elf felt even through their thick armour. Today, despite all the evidence, was a good day.

Merrill rested her head on Marian’s shoulder and for one brief moment, all was right in the universe.

A beeping from Merrill’s hand threw them both out of their haven.

“She’s nearby, two clicks to the south,” Merrill said.

“I’ll take point,” Hawke grunted. Stepping away from her lover and in front of the group. They would have to continue their date another day.

They fell into formation, well versed on their military roles, and Duncan was a quick study. Merrill stood behind Hawke, constantly scanning their surroundings for any movement whilst Duncan kept scanning the horizon with his eyes, something he claimed helped him sense the monsters out there.

“to our east now, love,” Merrill chimed in eventually. They had been walking in silence for about ten minutes.

Hawke tapped her visor, and the compass on her hud popped up. The visor was an invisible screen that only she could detect. All of the away team wore them, and they were invaluable for things like this. The technology helped them follow their objectives, and keep an eye on their team’s vital signs.

“We’re getting closer, well not too close but closer than we were. We're still far out, well not miles away, about five minutes, maybe less. I’m not entirely sure. The readings are strange,” Merrill nattered on. “I can’t be reading it right. It’s sending me some sort of signal I think, but I can’t transcribe it. One moment, if I reverse the polarity, change the matter to anti-matter, and maybe just maybe I can…. Yes! I reversed the Heisenberg principle! I didn’t think that was possible, I should write this down before I for-”

“Merrill…” Hawke sighed.

“I’m babbling again, aren’t I? Sorry,” Merrill giggled. “I think the suit is sending us a message on Shepard’s condition. It’s too damaged for me to read it but I got some data. It seems as though the shield hasn’t failed and is at fifteen percent, but that doesn’t mean anything.”

“Ok, double time it. If we received this message, the darkspawn could have too. I don’t want us to be here any longer than we need.”

They set off in a jog, pushing themselves harder than perhaps they needed but Hawke would not let them be caught here. They would not last in a fight against the horde.

**OoOoO**

“Ma’am, I am Miranda Lawson, First Officer of the Normandy, or at least I was. Reporting for duty,” A raven haired woman spoke up as Leliana watched the survivors disperse. “I am equipped to work in any department, but I personally think I am better suited to either command or science. It is your discretion though Ma’am.”

“Nice to meet you, Miranda, call me Leliana, not Ma’am, please. Makes me seem so old. If you would prefer, I need someone to take emergency responsibilities of the helm. I need to stay in the sick bay, and all our other high ranking officers are either injured, indisposed, or off the ship. We are at a loss, and need someone to hold the bridge,” Leliana smiled warmly as she looked at the new woman. She was truly beautiful, tall, and something in her eyes betrayed a keen intellect. She was a brilliant addition to the squad.

“Aye, Leliana, should I start now?” Miranda saluted.

“Yes please, Miranda. If you have personnel files for the Normandy’s survivors, I would gladly take them. Please send them to me as soon as possible. I’ll be in the sickbay if you need me,” Leliana stated. She returned the salute and turned away.

As Leliana walked back into the corridor, she could hear Miranda’s heels clicking as she left in the opposite direction towards the helm. She smiled to herself as she realised that all the horror must be behind them now, and she had a chance to breathe. Her wife was alive, the ship had a leader, and more importantly they were all safe for the time being.

For just one moment they could relax.

She rushed back to the sickbay, not wanting to spoil her mood by being away from a high Lyla, and that was something she wouldn’t miss for anything.

Snoring filled the corridor outside the med bay as she approached, and Leliana struggled to suppress her guffaws as she realised that it was coming from her Lyla.

“Mon amour, for someone so scary you can be so funny,” She giggled as she crossed the room to sit beside Lyla’s bed. “My adorable tempest, if only they knew how cute you were. No one would be scared of you.”

She reached across and held her wife’s hand in her left, whilst taking her data pad out with her right. Miranda had wasted no time at all in sending the files to her. This would make for some interesting reading.

“Leli?” A familiar voice bounced around the room and hit her, pulling her away from her files. “I wasn’t expecting to see you here.”

“Josie!” she called out, putting her pad away as her friend walked towards her. “I’d stand but…” She gestured to her wife.

“I understand, my friend. How is she? Well, I hope.”

“Honestly? She’s high as a kite! Dr. Wynne gave her some rather strong anesthetic, and my gosh, Josie, you should have seen her.” Leliana giggled.

“I can only imagine, mon amie,” Josie smiled.

“But why are you here, Josie?” Leliana smirked up at her.

“I’m one of the donors for Crystal and the doctors want more blood. Apparently, it’s more complicated than they imagine, or something or other. Either way, I’m here, and Cassandra should be here shortly.”

“Cassandra Pentaghast? She’s a lovely woman, if not a bit, how should I put it, blunt? How are you two getting on?” Leliana grinned up at her friend.

“She’s a lovely woman, Leliana, you and she have a long friendship, no? I’m surprised we have never met properly before. But I am glad we are now. She says the sweetest things.”

“Oh?” Leliana smirked. “You’ll have to tell me all about them-” The door hissed open from the corridor and a tall woman stepped in, her hair braided around her head and her brown eyes locked onto Leliana before she nodded. “Another time, mon amie, she is here now. Cassandra! Nice to see you, old friend.”

“And you, Leliana. You are well, I hope,” Cassandra grunted.

“Ah, you are both here,” Wynne called out as she entered from her now shared office. “ Come back here please.”

“Speak later,” Leliana smiled as she waved them off, looking back down at the pad.

**OoOoO**

“She’s over here,” Merrill shouted out as her tricorder beeped louder. “Under that pile of dirt.”

She waved her staff, using its telekinetic energy to pull and turn the soil aside, pulling it up and away from the corpse.

Her tricorder beeped once more, and she dropped it in surprise.

It couldn’t be right, the data must be wrong. She took it back up, tapped the side a few times before smacking it. “Come on, my friend, work with me,” she grunted as she reset it completely.

She ran forward, ignoring the cries from Hawke that it was unstable and began clawing the dirt away by hand. Her grasp hit something soft, and she scrambled even faster. Shepard was under here, and if she wasn’t wrong, time was of the essence.

“Creators,” she gasped as the body was revealed. She grabbed the tricorder and set it for a full body scan, it beeped a steady but weak rhythm. “She’s alive.”


	16. Orbs of Fatality

Hawke raced toward the elf who sat paralyzed overtop Shephard's corpse. Grabbing her wife by the shoulders, Hawke hugged her close and gently pulled the stunned woman to her feet.

"She's alive," Merrill repeated, her voice so low the lieutenant barely heard it.

Hawke shook her head, "Mer, she can't be. I know you want her to be but—"

"She is alive!" Alistair called out. "Duncan, help me pull her out."

Hawke watched in shock as Duncan and Alistair dragged out the unmoving form of Commander Shephard. Had everyone gone mad? They realized no one could survive a fall from space, right? The odds of Shephard's survival were astronomical.

The lieutenant was proved wrong when Merrill snapped back to reality and yanked out her tricorder to show her wife Shephard's life sign. It was weak, but it was there, the commander's heart still beat.

"Okay," Hawke started, finally accepting what was happening. "I'm no expert, but she probably needs a doctor like yesterday, so we need to move. Duncan, grab the body. Merrill, take point with me. Alistair, you guard the rear. Let's move out!"

Everyone gave a nod, and in no time the group made their way back toward the shuttle. Halfway through the journey Hawke stopped in her tracks. There was an odd, disconcerting shift in the air, clouds formed overhead and blocked the sun. _Where did those clouds come from?_

A shiver skittered through Hawke's spine as an eerie silence fell around them. An unnatural silence, the kind that was deafening and foreboding.

"They are near," Duncan whispered.

A howl came in the distance. Hawke readied her weapon and faced the direction in which it came but saw nothing. "Okay, pick up the pace everyone."

Together, the party hurried back only to find their shuttle had been ravaged, damaged, and flipped upside down. Hawke was not in the mood to meet the creature large enough to have flipped an entire shuttle.

"What do we do now?" Merrill asked worriedly.

Hawke surveyed the area around them. Night was falling fast; endless plains of nothingness surrounded them. Their only option was to turn back where they found Shephard and look for a place to hide or stay and fix the shuttle.

"Duncan, how long until they find us?"

"Not long I'm afraid. Darkspawn are guided by instinct when not under direct order of the archdemon. They will keep marching toward us until we no longer breathe. We cannot hide."

Hawke began to internally panic but refused to let her team see. They didn't have the time for repairs, but she could see no other alternative. "Then I guess we better get to work. Merrill, get started on the shuttle, I'll assist you in a minute. Duncan and Alistair, put Shephard down near the spacecraft and start working on a way to get this thing upright."

No one wasted time following order. Everyone knew what was at stake.

"There's at least one bright side to the shuttle being upside down," Merrill said once Hawke rejoined her on the top of the vehicle.

"What's that, Mer?"

"Easy access to the engine components."

Hawke shook her head and smiled a pained smile. Only Merrill could see a bright side in this situation. "I love you, Merrill."

The elf stopped what she was doing to place a much-needed reassuring palm to the lieutenant's shoulder. "I love you, too. And it's going to be okay. We'll get through this, we always do."

With another weak smile and a nod, Hawke returned to work on the engine. She grew more desolate the longer they worked. Several essential cylinders had been crushed and damaged beyond repair. They needed replacement, even Merrill's brilliance couldn't salvage the mechanism.

"They're coming!" called Alistair from somewhere under the spacecraft. "We're out of time!"

Hawke couldn't hide the fear in her eyes as she glanced up and took in the frightening scene of the marching hoard before her. It looked almost as though the earth's surface itself was crawling. There must had been thousands upon thousands of the hideous beasts. How was this possible? Mere moments ago the fields were clear as far as the eye could see. They hadn't even been gone long when they found Shephard. How had any creatures damaged the shuttle and fled without their noticing?

"Everyone inside the shuttle. It is our last hope," came Duncan's piercing voice, breaking Hawke from her string of thoughts. Their last hope was a bleak one to Hawke. Regardless, she grabbed Merrill just above the elbow and dragged her toward the door.

Together, the group scrambled inside. Sparks ignited in various corners inside the cabin. The helm and other consoles had become the ceiling with wires hanging from above. Duncan was the last to clamber in with Shephard's still motionless body.

"Our badges aren't strong enough to contact the Griffon. It must be something in the atmosphere. Can anyone reach that console up there?" Merrill cried out, pointing to a console overhead. Duncan nodded and stepped over the debris littering the cabin before lifting Merrill by the hips to where she was pointing.

The elf yelped in surprise, normally Hawke would think this was cute and tease her wife but it wasn't the time. "Alistair, shut the door!"

"Wait, is that— I think I see a dog!" said the blond as he raced out the shuttle door.

"What? Alistair get your ass back here!" Hawke swung half her body out the shuttle, her eyes growing wide as she noticed the hoard only a few hundred feet away. Frantically, she called and screamed for Alistair to come back, but the blond had disappeared.

"I'll get him," Duncan said quickly as he set Merrill back on her feet. The elf had some sort of module in her hands and made herself comfortable in a corner to focus on whatever project she had undertaken.

Duncan disappeared for a long moment; an eternity passed as Hawke listened carefully. Where were they? Suddenly, she heard fighting and Duncan's war cry followed by Alistair's bone chilling scream. Hearing a man shriek like that was a memory that would forever scorch the lieutenant's mind. She would never unhear it.

Without thinking, Hawke sprung toward her screeching friend. The men must have been battling twenty creatures on their own. Duncan dispatched many of them easily enough, but he was covered in much blood, seemingly his own. Alistair lay on the ground and what Hawke saw would be another image she would surely have nightmares about for the rest of her life if she survived this.

The dog Alistair had gone after was a large, well-built Marbari, it had its nozzle latched on tightly to Alistair's collar, dragging the blond out from under a pile of darkspawn. Unfortunately, Alistair's legs remained somewhere in the pile of monsters. A thick trail of blood followed the first officer's two bloody stumps.

"Alistair?" The dog dragged the blond to Hawke's feet and whined. Alistair's blue eyes stared at the sky, unfocused and lifeless. Hawke knelt beside him and let a few tears fall as she grabbed Alistair's shoulder and whipped a tricorder off her belt to see if he had a pulse. Only one continuous flatlining hum rang through the air.

Regretfully, Hawke closed her tricorder and looked up just in time to meet Duncan's chocolate orbs. Duncan asked the silent question of Alistair's condition; Hawke shook her head. In that brief moment of distraction, Duncan had looked away and had broken the first rule of fighting; never turn your back on your enemy.

Hawke froze, she tried to call out but couldn't, her body remained paralyzed, refused her orders to move, all she could do was watch as a giant creature towering over the warrior swung its blade toward Duncan and sliced his head clean off. The brunet top was sent flying across the battlefield.

Hawke screamed and crumbled to her knees as the hoard closed in on her and the growling Marbari that had nuzzled under her elbow in a protective stance. Hawke barely noticed the limbs that came around her and latched on tightly. Lithe arms tried desperately to drag Hawke back into the shuttle but Hawke refused, "Noooo! We can't leave them!"

"Please, come with me." Came Merrill's fragile whisper in her ear.

That's when Hawke realized she was putting the woman she loved most in danger. The lieutenant grit her teeth and rose to her feet before turning and racing back inside the shuttle with the elf, the Marbari close in tow. Hawke pressed several lifeless buttons beside the door. Dread filled every inch of her entire being as she realized the door wouldn't shut. "The door's jammed!"

The darkspawn closed the distance, approaching fast. This was it, this was their end. She had failed Alistair, Duncan, Shephard, the Griffon…Merrill.

"Hawke! Get over here!" the engineer called.

Hawke raced to Merrill who was knelt over Shephard's body and wrapped her arms around her wife thinking this was goodbye. The dog slipped between them and licked Hawke's face. "This is so not the time, mutt!"

Merrill held some sort of beeping power module to Hawke's chest just then before shouting, "Merrill to the Griffon, emergency beam out. Engage!"

Just as Hawke felt the tingly sensation her body associated with being transported, she glanced toward the jammed opening in the side of the shuttle and locked gazes with a monster with fire for eyes. Its face rotting and snarling as it drew back its weapon and aimed at the lieutenant commander. Hawke felt the piercing sting of an arrow impale her through the chest before the world vanished.


	17. A Painful Visit

Lyla woke up and instantly regretted it. Her head felt like it was being pulled apart by the ears by two large horses. She opened her eyes, and the blinding bright lights of the med bay sent another wave of agony through her mind. She should have never awoken.

"Lyla?" A voice from her side made her rethink her regret, and she slowly turned her head to look at the beauty that was her wife, Leliana. "You awake, cutie pie?"

The heat that formed on her cheeks was almost enough to soothe the pain in her head, almost. And, she couldn't help the smile that sneaked onto her mouth. "Morning, ma vhenan," she grumbled.

"It's evening actually, silly bear, but I will forgive your confusion," Leliana giggled. "Do you remember where you are?"

"I'm in the sickbay, I was hurt on the planet below, and the last thing I remember was seeing the Normandy in a Dragon's jaw. Please tell me I imagined that?" Lyla groaned as she sat up on the bed.

"I'm afraid not, my love. We have managed to retrieve all of the crew from the Normandy, save for Captain Shepard. I'm afraid we lost her, Lyla. She sacrificed herself to save her team and by the Maker, she did it. I've sent an away team down to the planet below to retrieve her body, she deserves a heroes burial," Leliana whispered. She reached for Lyla's hand and held it tight in her own as their eyes met.

"ALERT," a siren screamed overhead as red lights began to flash. "AWAY-TEAM TO BE TRANSPORTED. BRACE FOR TWO INJURED."

To the bed on Lyla's right, a white shimmering light appeared as it gradually formed the body of Captain Shepard, and to the side of it, crouched Hawke, Merrill, and what seemed to be a dog.

"Doctor!" Merrill shouted as she stood. "Shepard is alive, barely, she needs immediate attention. Hawke was shot as we transported. Help them, please."

The pair of doctors both rushed to the Captain's side, and the elf stepped away and towards Lyla. Merrill stood before them stoically, a single tear fell from her face, she wiped it, and her stony mask was back.

"Captain, there's no easy way to say this," she began. She shuffled from one foot to the other as the only sound in the room was the doctors talking to each other.

"Merrill, where are Alistair and Duncan?" Leliana gasped once the silence became awkward.

"That's what I'm trying to say…" the elf gulped. "I'm sorry, sister. We lost them."

"What?" Lyla growled. Red began to creep in from the side of her vision as she leant forward. "What did you just say?" She hissed.

"Alistair and Duncan are both dead, Captain. They died saving both mine and Marian's life," Merrill stepped back under the intensity of her sister's stare.

"My First Officer is dead," Lyla growled. She pulled herself off of the bed as the red mist enveloped her vision. "YOU LET HIM DIE!" She roared as she let loose her fist into the wall, cracking the hard plastic that made up the wall.

"Lov-" Leliana began.

"NO!" She roared as she turned to look at Leliana. "Do not talk and bring me down again. Why wasn't he on the Bridge? HE WAS MEANT TO BE ON THE FUCKING BRIDGE."

"I relieved him of his command, vhenan," Leliana shrunk into her chair. "He is, was, not suited for leadership, we both know this. I asked him to look after Duncan as he was aboard this ship, and together they both went to help Hawke."

"YOU!" Lyla screamed as she stabbed her finger towards her wife. "You killed him, Leliana."

She turned, ignoring the raised voices of her inferior officers, ignoring the sobbing of her wife, and ignoring the pain that shot through her as she took each step. The red wall overtook her, and she limped her way to the holodeck. Anywhere away from her loved ones, and somewhere she could fight.

She hobbled through the corridors, ignoring the shouts for her from the sickbay. She was the captain, she had the right to go where she wanted on her ship.

"Move," She growled at some crew members huddled in the centre of the corridor. The nearest looked up in shock and her eye's widened, she jumped back, and the sea of people parted as the Tempest moved through. "Deck six," she roared at the turbo lift as she entered.

It shot down, towards the right deck. And Lyla leant against the railing, glad for a moment's respite where she didn't need to feel. Her brain was a mashup of different voices shouting at her to do different things, go to different people, punch everything.

She stepped out of the lift and stared at the holodeck door. It hissed open as she approached. "Computer, run programme 'Mahariel Charlie Lima Alpha November'."

The forest of her childhood home rushed into view. Giant luscious trees rose up higher than the eye could see, up to the sky and further. Memories of clambering up them in her youth flooded through her and threatened to take the edge off her anger, she pushed them away and began to hobble through the woods.

"Da'len!" A voice echoed through the trees, and her adoptive mother stepped through.

"Computer, disable Ashalle for the time being," Lyla growled as she carried on limping. Ashalle froze, shimmered, and was gone. "In fact, Computer, disable all but Tamlen, Pol, Feneral, and Junar. Bring up the training circle and disable the safety protocols."

Elves appeared around her as she hobbled to the centre of the circle that was materialising. She roared and stood tall, ignoring the pain that throbbed through her body and walked confidently to her peers.

"Why are we here, Lyla?" the tall man elf asked. His blond hair fell across his face as he locked his blue eyes onto Lyla's green.

"Tamlen, you know why you're here," Lyla growled.

"Something happened on the ship, and you need to hit us? Very healthy, lethallan," He smirked.

She jumped forward, punching him in the jaw and knocking the smile off his face. "YOU DO NOT GET TO JUDGE ME, SETH'LIN!" She screamed. "All of you, fight me!"

The three other elves stepped into the ring, swinging wildly as she ducked and weaved. They were quick, but the Tempest was faster when she was berserk, and Lyla was the angriest she had been in a good long while.

She roared, and unleashed a torrent of kicks and punches on the red headed man, Junar, until he was a bloody mess on the floor. Tamlen screamed from behind her and jumped on her back, dragging her down to the floor.

A punch came from the side of her, smashing her face into the floor. Then another, and another, and another. She gave up fighting, gave up caring anymore.

"Enough!" A strong voice commanded, bouncing around the trees and hitting her harder than any punch as she realised who owned it.

"Alistair?" She whispered. "Is it really you?"

"Hello, lethallan," He smiled warmly as he pulled the elves off her, watching them dissipate as he pulled her to her feet.

"But you're dead, felas," She gasped. "How?"

"I'm part of the program, my friend. I've all of Alistair's feelings and entries in his log to complete me. He talked about you a lot, Lyla. He loved you like a sister," Alistair held a hand out to her, pulling her into a tight hug.

"We never talked about it," Lyla sobbed into his chest. "I never told you how much I loved your counsel. How I relied on you because I knew deep down inside that you would always do the right thing. You were better than me in every way, lethallan. I was a weapon my whole life, you were my shield, and I loved you for it."

"He knew, Lyla. He knew," Alistair held her tight.


	18. Broken Hearts, Equal Parts

"Computer, end program."

Tears stung Lyla's eyes as Alistair's comforting arms disappeared from around her lithe frame and the holodeck returned to its original blinding white wall state. Feeling drained and exhausted, Lyla glanced up to see who would dare interrupt her.

She shook her head as she saw an angry Leliana striding quickly toward her, she should have figured. No one else would chase after the enraged hot headed elf, no one would be stupid enough to. Leliana would be the only one who could manage to leave alive.

As her wife drew closer, Lyla felt the boiling anger inside dull to nothingness. She relaxed and allowed herself to weaken in front of the one she loved. It wasn't often, even to the nightingale Lyla would show such vulnerability, but the elf could fight no more. She had lost a dear friend, and her heart ached. The time for apologies was near, but right then, she needed Leliana's embrace more than air.

Leliana's angry strained features loosened once she was close enough to see the distraught captain. Lyla crumbled to her knees but was caught by her wife's swift reflexes before she could hit the floor. Silence fell over them like a thick blanket as Leliana held on tightly to Lyla who silently broke down in the embrace.

"Grieve, my love," Leliana whispered after a time. "He was a good man. We will carry him in our hearts from this day on; his memory never forgotten."

Lyla latched on tighter. Leliana always knew just what to say, just how to calm her, and just what the elf needed. She truly was the most amazing woman in the universe, and she was all Lyla's.

OoOoO

Morrigan shifted in her chair beside the biobed for the umpteenth time while she watched Bela silently sob into Crystal's still unconscious form. The former pirate was yet again huddled beside Crystal on the already too small bed. They had refused to leave their lover's side.

Two days, and nothing. No movement, no improvement. Doctors Wynne and Chakwas could not yet even tell whether the blood transfusion was working or not. Although the contaminated blood was being filtered out, there was no way to know how much damage had already been caused. What toll it had already taken on the young ensign's life.

Together, Bela and Morrigan waited… and waited. They watched crew members come and go from sickbay with dead eyes and heavy hearts. Morrigan noted the flirtatious nature between Crystal's blood donors Cassandra and Josephine but did not comment.

They grew distant from others and rarely even spoke to each other. Words were not needed, all that was required between the two of them was a gentle caress here and a comforting embrace there. It was all they needed as they continued to wait.

The engineer felt herself begin to fade; she felt herself detach and grow withdrawn. She had barely noticed Lyla's angry outburst once her stammering sister had finally reported the first officer's death. The elf's poor wife had taken the brunt of the captain's misdirected tongue lashing.

Morrigan couldn't bring herself to form an opinion let alone help. Nor could she bring herself to rise and offer her assistance when Hawke was being dragged to the far end of sickbay while shrieking in agony. Without Crystal, it was as if she wasn't really alive. And everything she was feeling; she saw in Isabela too. They were a mess without their third love, and always would be.

Morrigan glanced up at the new doctor to suddenly approach. Her name was Dr. Chakwas; she was the physician on the Normandy. Morrigan was glad to have another medical professional looking over her partner but secretly wished the older woman could have given her more hope than Dr. Wynne. Instead, she concluded the same diagnosis; Crystal was sick, and they wouldn't know more until an appropriate amount of time was allotted for the transfusion to produce results.

The waiting and constant worry was driving Morrigan insane. The only reason she hadn't lost it was for the sake of Bela. They knew how fortunate they were to get Crystal back at all but every moment was agonizing.

"Morrigan," Dr. Chakwas whispered softly. "You and Isabela should eat something and get some proper rest. I promise to notify you the second of any change. I won't push you further, but I would not be doing my duty as a doctor if I did not urge you."

The engineer nodded as Chakwas crossed the room and re-entered her and Wynne's office. Morrigan drew her brows as she watched the two older women interact. Wynne had been stressed for days; it seemed only the new doctor could but a smile on her face even if it was a mild one. Turning back to face Bela, Morrigan reached out with a gentle hand and lightly grasped the pilot's soft caramel shoulder.

Isabela turned over, her eyes puffy from crying and exhaustion. Like Morrigan, she hadn't slept or eaten anything in days.

"My love," Morrigan uttered, her voice dry and crispy. She was probably dehydrated. "Dr. Chakwas is right. We should eat and do the things we need to do."

With dread in her eyes, Bela shook her head stubbornly. "I'm not leaving her."

"She would want us to take care of ourselves, Isabela. Please, my love. If not for me, please do it for her."

Suddenly, Isabela sat up and faced Morrigan, concern lacing her face as she cupped the chief's jaw. "You know there is nothing I wouldn't do for you, Morrigan. It's just… it's just so…hard."

"I know," Morrigan responded covering the former pirate's hands with her own. "Then, please? I'm certain you would not want our love to wake and smell you like this."

That got a pained chuckle out of the brunette. "Okay, okay my love. You win."

Finally, Isabela extricated herself from Crystal's side and stood from the biobed. Morrigan wrapped her long thin arms around her lover and held her close, "I love you."

Isabela responded by pressing plump chapped lips to Morrigan's. They were both definitely dehydrated.

OoOoO

_The next day…_

Leliana left the captain's ready room and strode onto the bridge with her head high and mask in place. It had been a rough night. Lyla was still distraught and grieving over her fallen friend. Leliana could not fault her and ached for her love's broken heart. She had cuddled Lyla through the night and offered her support. It was all she could do.

When morning came, she rose from their bed and prayed at her private shrine for the strength to continue on. She had to. She had an obligation, a duty, an oath to uphold as acting captain until her wife could return to duty.

"Status, Miss Lawson?" Leliana asked her new acting first officer.

The raven-haired woman stood abruptly and saluted Leliana before responding. "We've set course away from the planet and back to warden headquarters as per your request. We are traveling at warp eight and should arrive in a few days' time. The Griffon is fully operational and operating at peak efficiency."

"Thank you, Miranda. Have you an update on Shephard's status?"

"Commander Shephard is on life support in the medical bay and is being carefully looked over by your lead scientist Liara T'soni."

Leliana thought back to when she first met Miranda. Wasn't she a scientist too? "Did you say you were a scientist, Miranda?"

"Yes, Captain. Biotic Intelligence Science Engineer, I will serve as needed but I may be of better use overseeing Shephard's reconstruction."

Leliana nodded, "I agree. But you've just come off the night shift. Get some rest, then report to the science lab when you are able to confer with Dr. T'soni. I will notify her of your new partnership."

With a nod and another salute, Miranda hurried away. Leliana took her seat in the Captain's chair and looked around at the new faces. The events of the past few days began to weigh heavy on her shoulders once more as she realized how daunting the threat looming before them really was. Darkspawn, the archdemon dragon, death of crewmembers and comrades; the near loss of Lyla, Crystal, and now Hawke.

What was happening? In a matter of days, she had nearly lost everyone dear to her heart. Closing her eyes, she silently thanked the Maker that things had not been worse. She could have lost everyone, but they were still here, and Leliana believed they were still alive for a reason.

For what reason, however, remained another unnerving mystery.


	19. A New Dawn

Lyla slowly sat up from her bed. She had been broken the previous night, a weakness that she didn't even want to acknowledge she had, but Leliana had been there. Like always. Her wife was the strong one in this relationship, to everyone's surprise. Leliana was the rock that held Lyla's mind together, and she was always eternally grateful to her.

Their room was a mess, but Lyla was in no mind to care. Memories of the night before flooded her mind. Hawke was dying, or near, Shepard was dying, or near, Crystal was dying, or near, and Alistair. Creators, Alistair was dead. She pushed that thought from her mind, letting it wither away on the ether before promising to mourn him when she was able. Right now, her ship needed her, but more importantly, her family did.

Marian was family, and if she was hurt then so was Merrill. Her first order of action for the day was to visit her sister. Leliana had agreed to take the bridge for the morning, letting Lyla recover for a while more before returning to her responsibilities.

It was a simple matter to stand and walk to their shared dresser. Her uniforms were neatly piled in the top drawer, Leliana was a neat freak, and it was easy enough for her to reach in and take the top one.

She stared at herself in the tall mirror Leliana had gotten them, smiling at how fierce and threatening she looked before pulling her hair up into her usual tightly braided ponytail. She loved her hair, but it did get in the way.

Her comm badge was on the side table, she grabbed it clipped it on her uniform and left the room.

The turbolift was on the other end of the bridge, and Lyla knew she would have to appear strong as she marched across it.

The door hissed open onto the bridge, and as one the crew turned to look at her. She smirked as they gawked, and marched on, letting the power of the Tempest carry her towards her wife.

She planted a kiss on the acting captain's head and continued on, ignoring the hushed whispers echoing behind her.

The turbolift popped open as she approached, one last smile towards her wife before the door shut and she was gone. "Deck five."

She stepped out of the lift after it made its near instantaneous travel. The conversations of the doctors and scientists in the med bay rang into the corridor as Lyla approached and she took a minute to listen.

"No, no, no, no. That just would not work!" Merrill squeaked. "The bio-emitter would cross feed the biotech in her body, giving us false positives! Shepard's body would give completely wrong signals."

"She's right, Miranda," the voice of Liara T'soni bounced around the walls. "But if we use the bio-emitter and then cross reference it with the previous scans of Shepard from both before and after the accident, it will be better than any information we have."

"Exactly!" A new voice rang out, presumably of Miranda. Lyla stepped into the med bay, taking the appearance of the new woman in, wondering why she was wearing such a tight body suit instead of the regulation uniform. Miranda was not her staff, or at least she wasn't until recently, so Lyla kept her mouth shut, just walking slowly towards the group as they argued.

"We connect the bio-emitter to the computer in her suit!" Miranda shouted, raising a finger into the air. "The computer can communicate with our scans, helping us filter out the useless information from the useful! Dr T'Soni, can you show me what you've got so far? I've got a brilliant idea."

Lyla stepped up behind her sister, placing a gentle hand on the elf's shoulder, and smiling as Merrill jumped. "Morning, Merbear," she giggled. "Can we talk?"

"Lyla!" Merrill hesitated, "but of course, sister, out in the hall, yes?"

"That's fine," Lyla smiled as warmly as she could. She took Merrill by the hand and led her outside, standing outside the med bay and then immediately pulling her in close for a hug. "I love you, Merrill. I'm so sorry for last night. I should never have spoken to you like that, there are no excuses."

"Oh!" Merrill giggled into the hug, holding her sister tight. "You don't need to apologise to me, Lyly! We're family, and you had just lost a close friend. I understand. Although, you may need to apologise to that wife of yours. You were even angrier than usual with her, sis."

"I already have, Mer," Lyla snorted as she let her sister go. "I spent most of the night telling her how sorry I am, but you know Leli. She had already forgiven me before I had a chance to speak."

"She's far too good for you," Merrill laughed.

"Don't I know it," Lyla smiled. "How's Hawke doing?"

"She's stable, Dr Chakwas was kind enough to give Marian her full attention whilst Dr Wynne looked after the other two. She's excellent, lethallan, a fine addition to our little, well no big, clan here. The Griffon is lucky to have her really."

"Excuse me," Miranda interrupted, standing in the doorway, "I was hoping I could steal Merrill back. I'm sorry, I don't know who you are."

"Captain Lyla Mahariel. You're Miranda, no?" Lyla smirked, standing to her full five feet. "Scientist from the Normandy, if my wife was correct."

"Captain?" Miranda stood straighter. "Nice to meet you, Ma'am. I'm glad to see you up and about! Your wife was correct yes, I'm a first class scientist as well as many other things, but I don't need to show off. No doubt you can see my serving record at any time. I really must insist I steal Merrill away, though, I need her advice on some scans."

"Be my guest, falon," Lyla smiled, gesturing for her sister to go with the human. "I'm coming in any way. I want to check on the conditions of your patients."

She followed her sister and Miranda into the med bay, nodding at her subordinates who had all saluted. "Report, please."

"Welcome back to the world of the calm, Lyla," Dr Wynne chimed. "Good to see you're a bit less Tempest today. Shall we start with Commander Hawke?"

"Whoever you prefer, Doctor. I wouldn't mind some introductions, however. There are a few new faces here, and unless my head injury was worse than I realised, I have yet to meet them."

"But of course, Captain. This is Doctor Chakwas, the head doctor of the Normandy, Leliana assigned her here whilst you were incapacitated. I would like to formally request she join me as head of Medicine here," Wynne stated. Chakwas jumped but contained her surprise, nodding her head a quarter inch as Lyla looked at her.

"Two heads?" Lyla questioned.

"Correct," Wynne replied. "There have been an extraordinary amount of people coming and going through my med bay in the last day alone. I feel that the additional expertise of my fellow Doctor is not only beneficial but honestly needed."

"Granted then," Lyla remarked. "Welcome to the crew, Doctor Chakwas."

"Thank you, Captain," the grey haired woman smiled.

"You've already met Miranda, I assume?" Wynne asked, and continued when Lyla nodded. "She has an interesting idea of how to fully regenerate all the damage that has been done to not only Shepard, but we are hopeful that it could be adapted to Crystal. We will have to wait and see, however."

"I'd like to request her in my science team," Dr T'Soni piped in. "She is a genius, and you know I dislike using that term. A fine addition."

"Permission granted, Liara. I'd like you to make this your top priority, provided you hadn't already."

"last, but certainly not least, Dr Solus here is the head scientist of the Normandy, sorry was, he is assisting us with Shepard's recovery," Wynne said.

"A busy team then? I like it. Welcome, Dr Solus," Lyla nodded her head to the salarian.

He smiled, and his already naturally wide eyes widened further as he opened his mouth. "Dalish? Yes, dalish, same as the other one. Noticed scars and telltale signs of temper. New project is interesting, thank you, Mahariel. Invigorating, complex parameters and a new top lab. Will be jubilant."

"Ah, right?" Lyla smirked. "You science types are always odd."

"Oi!" Liara laughed.

"No offence, Doctor," Lyla giggled. She turned to walk towards her sister's lover and noticed the giant creature lying on the floor beside her bed. "An er… Dog?"

"Correct, Lyla. He seems rather taken with the commander here. They rescued it from Lothering. Or rather I hear that Alistair did Maker rest his soul." Wynne mumbled.

"Aye, Creators guide him. He was a good man."

"The best," Wynne smiled.

"When we get a chance, we will mourn him properly, lethallan. He was our brother and deserves nothing less, but we cannot let others down whilst we do so. When we are safe, we will bury our fallen," Lyla turned to look at her crew. "Now, back to work, the lot of you."

She stepped away from the med bay, as her mind raced. The crew was growing faster than she had ever imagined, and people she knew nothing about were now part of her ship's clan. This was dangerous really. She trusted the Wardens, and the judgement of her fellow captains but her clan was a special bond, and anyone in her ship was under her protection.

She needed to learn as much about the new additions to the crew as possible, and her mind spun until she realised exactly what she needed.

Long ago, when the Grey Warden's were still a relatively new faction, they had required the use of an intelligence branch. A position that had become redundant over the years as they grew in size, but Lyla was paranoid. One didn't survive as long as she did in war without it. Throughout the ship, there was one woman who she trusted more than any other, more than herself, Leliana. She had been a spy in a past life, an intelligence gatherer for the Orlesian Empire, and had taken to the life as a fish in water. Lyla hated bringing up the past but right now perhaps that's what was needed.

"Mahariel to Mahariel," She laughed as she pressed her badge. "Meet me in our room. Get someone else to take the bridge. We need to talk."

_What?_

"That came out wrong!" Lyla squeaked. "I've got an idea and need to run it by you."

_That's more like it, love._

Lyla smiled as she walked back to the turbolift, reversing the trip she had made earlier and stepping into the lift with a small smile on her face. There was a lot of uncertainty, a lot of war ahead, but for the first time since they had started, she had a plan.


	20. Save Me

Leliana was already inside and waiting in their shared quarters when Lyla arrived. The elf smiled at her wife as she crossed the room and pressed a quick kiss to the other woman's lips. Leliana returned the kiss, mouth moving with ultimate affection before gently pushing the fiery elf away and urging the captain over to the bed where they could sit.

Leliana leaned close and cupped the elf's warm cheek before speaking, "What is it you wanted to talk about, my love?"

Lyla covered that hand with her own before intertwining their fingers and bringing it down to hold in her lap. She gazed into those beautiful oceans before rising from the bed and standing at attention before her wife with hands clasped behind her back.

This was not the time for tender moments and gentle touches, this was the time for profession, which meant Lyla had to slip on the same mask of confidence she showed to the rest of her crew.

She took a deep breath, summoning the courage for what she needed to say. Leliana was good at her past; she didn't love the work, but she was good at it, and Lyla needed her skills.

"Vhenan, there's something I want to ask of you, not as your wife but as your captain."

Leliana's brows furrowed, "Just ask, my love. Whatever you wish of me, I will do it."

Tears stung the captain's eyes but did not fall. How could she ask this of Leliana of all people? "There is a war on the horizon, and we need to be ready. There is no one I trust more than you, Leli. I want you to be my intelligence officer, and my confidant. I am big enough to admit I cannot lead this ship alone, but I don't know who I can trust. Merging these two crews will be a massive task that must transition smoothly as I shove them into the chaos of this war, into the very heart of it."

Leliana's features hardened into the spymaster she once was as she stood from the bed, "The archdemon, you intend to go after it."

Lyla gave a firm nod, "We'll head back to headquarters but you know as well as I do those seth'lins won't offer to help until the darkspawn are knocking on their doorsteps. We are grey wardens; we have treaties that can help us recruit other civilizations and build an army in times of a blight. I think it is our best hope, vhenan. Will you help me?"

Leliana straightened and strode over to Lyla without hesitation and leaned in close before whispering in the elf's sensitive ear, "How have you not learned by now that everything I am belongs to you until my dying breath?" The Griffon's new spymaster pressed a quick kiss to the captain's cheek before turning to leave, "I'll get started right away. You're still recovering, my love. You should get some more rest. I'll brief you when you wake."

The doors hissed closed before Lyla could respond. She quickly brushed the single tear to have finally slipped free from its confinements and sat on the bed again while she gathered her thoughts. She hoped she had done the right thing. Leliana was definitely the person for the job, the person she needed, she was also Lyla's teammate, in love as well as life.

As Lyla's lids grew heavy, she decided to take the spymaster's advice and get some rest. Kicking off her boots, the elf crashed her back against the mattress and fell into a deep sleep.

OoOoO

Lyla opened her eyes to an ashen sky lit by a crimson moon hanging high overhead the dark forest. She recognized this place; it feigned the woods of her childhood home but something was incredibly off, she had been here before. This was where she had first seen the dragon, the monster, the dreaded archdemon.

Automatically the elf's quick hands flew to her waist but just like last time, her blade was gone and once again she was unarmed. She surveyed her surroundings frantically, dread growing like a fanned flame in the pit of her stomach as she searched for an exit.

This world was darker than before, as if the atmosphere itself had become sickened and tainted by an unseen evil. The wind picked up and began to howl, among the breeze floated the song Lyla heard her first time here. She started to run, knowing the song would only rise in volume until it reached crippling heights.

Through the trees, she dashed and dodged her way through with no clue of where she was headed. The song escalated to a shrill shriek, Lyla covered her stinging ears and kept running. The song intensified, growing louder, stronger, closer until it was just behind the panicked elf.

Lyla grit her teeth and spun around at the last second just as she felt a presence loom behind her, "GET AWAY!"

But there was nothing there. Silence filled the shadowed forest, the soft crimson glow of the moon lit the surrounding area around her to show that nothing and no one was in the vicinity. The breeze picked up again and Lyla shivered. Suddenly, the elf had the urge to follow its direction, as if she were being summoned; why, she didn't know.

Not having anything better to do, Lyla followed the gust of wind with her arms crossed while rubbing her shoulders for warmth. She walked a long while and was beginning to give up hope until she came across a giant archway in the center of the forest.

The arches appeared to be twisted blackened trees, bent against their will, rotted and gripped by endless blankets of ivy and moss. Shimmering lights floated and gleamed amid the giant doorway of this piece, like ripples atop a clear cerulean lake, a whirlpool of light.

Lyla approached the mysterious vortex with caution and curiosity; she stopped just a few feet away as she began to make out a faint reflection in the wavering surface. A face, that of a girl, a woman with pale features and dark hair but she was blurry.

Lyla stepped closer; her eyes grew wide as she recognized her incapacitated crewmember, Ensign Crystal Cousland.

"Crystal?" Lyla's voice came out shakier than she intended. Her breath hitched as she stared at the ghostly appearance of the crewmember she knew to be currently lying in her sick bay aboard the Griffon, the girl the doctors and scientists were trying desperately to wake.

"This is a dream," Lyla realized.

The blurred display slowly transitioned into one of clarity, revealing Crystal's distressed state. The ensign's expression was a cold one, sapphire orbs looked straight through the elf, as if they were entranced, withdrawn, lifeless. Bruises, gashes, and blood, covered the ghostly apparition.

Lyla could not see below the ensign's neck but had a feeling the rest of the ensign's body had been just as brutalized. A pale, bloody hand pressed against the peculiar surface of the doorway, Crystal's palm appeared as if it were being held against the underside of glass, like a two-way mirror.

Bravely, Lyla outstretched her hand and pressed it against the bloody one. She couldn't feel the other woman's hand; it was as though there was an invisible barrier between them. The surface was smooth and cold to the touch but nothing more.

Lyla gazed into the unfocused orbs still looking through her, "I'm going to save you, falon. Just tell me how to."

The elf thought she saw a ghost of a smile pull at Crystal's lips, but it was gone as quickly as it had appeared.

Suddenly, Crystal's dead gaze turned on Lyla; those sapphire orbs swirled into a blazing fire. Lyla tried to jump back, but her hand had somehow become infused against the barrier, against Crystal's palm which was now glowing an angry vibrant red.

Lyla shrieked as the pain of a thousand daggers ripped through her fingertips and engulfed her palm, the pain became dizzying as it continued to burn and scorch, singe, and sizzle her skin. Tears streaked her cheeks as she struggled to get away, but it was of no use. She was imprisoned to the barrier. Imprisoned to Crystal.

"Crystal please!" Lyla begged, "Let me go! Do not succumb to the taint! Fight, falon! Fight the beast!"

Lyla flew back, crashing against the dirt surface of the forest. Cradling her mangled hand, Lyla quickly got to her feet and faced Crystal once more. The ensign's eyes had been replaced by two orbs of night, darker than any blackness the elf had ever seen.

Crystal's expression broke into one of grief, she seemed desolate, on the verge of giving up. Not much fight was left in that tortured soul. A single bloody tear streamed down Crystal's cheek, leaving a sticky trail in its wake. She opened her mouth to speak, the fatal whisper of her words sent a shiver down Lyla's spine.

_Save me._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> seth'lins – thin blood (insult)  
> vhenan – heart  
> falon – friend


	21. Roaring Flames

Lyla woke up screaming, thankful for the sound proofing between her and the bridge. She was panting as she shot up, cold sweat sticking her pyjamas to her lithe frame.

She hated these nightmares with a growing passion. Leliana and the Doctors had all said she needed rest yet her enemy haunted her in her dreams, regardless of where it was in the universe.

This war would be the end of her, she feared. But she would never allow anyone to know it, not even her Leliana. Those sort of fears were best left in that other place, that dark, ill place.

Once, her dreams had been pleasant, filled with hopes of a family with Leliana, but now she had no foolish notions. That dragon monster was hunting her, singing her to her death as a siren sang to sailors. But she would not let her crew hit the rocks.

She gulped as she made her decision. If it ever came down to it, she would sacrifice herself before endangering them again. She had lost Alistair, nearly lost a lot of other people, and that was far too many.

She bowed her head, allowing herself a moment to pray. Her gods were important to her. The Creators gave her the strength and grace she needed to continue on. Elgar’nan gave her the passion she needed to seek revenge against the monsters they were warring against. Mythal kept her grounded, concentrating on protecting her family, her crew.

Andruil, the Goddess of the Hunt, and one of the three Creators Lyla honoured with her vallaslin. She kept Lyla on the prowl, keeping her steady and ready to pounce on their enemy at a moment’s notice. Lyla was many things, but she was a hunter first. Captain, Wife, Keeper, they were all vital to her, but they were all second, and part of the hunt.

She traced the lines of the bow on her face, circling it down across the mask on her eyes and let her thoughts drift to Dirthamen, the god of secrets. He was important to her, reminding her that it was clever to keep things back, to not play your entire hand before learning everything about the enemy. In Lyla’s mind, Leliana was the embodiment of this. A woman who was perfect for keeping secrets and gathering intelligence, and whatever questionable decisions Lyla had made in the last few days, setting Leliana up as Intelligence Officer was a good one.

The rest of her Gods were crucial to Lyla’s culture and her way of life, but she would not waste any more time of her day on them. They were at war, and she was about to lead it.

She stood, and grabbed her comm badge from her bedside table, mirroring her actions from the morning. One moment to gather her thoughts and she pressed it. “Lyla to Leliana.”

_I’m here, love_

“Are you ready to brief me, yet?” Lyla grunted, staring at her hand as flashes of her nightmare came back. The voice of her wife returned, but Lyla scarcely heard her as she moved her hand through the air, testing it and wondering.

Crystal, or something that had corrupted her, seemed to cripple her hand, and as Lyla focused on the memory, echoes of the pain shot through her fingers, causing her to shriek.

“Lyla!” Leliana’s voice shot through their bedroom door. It hissed open, and Leliana was there instantly. “What’s wrong, my love?”

“Nothing, just another bad dream, that’s all,” Lyla sighed as Leliana held her close. “Crystal was there. All disgusting and corrupted. Poor thing.”

“It was just a dream, ma cherie,” Leliana crooned. “Our doctors will fix her up, don’t you worry your pretty little head about it.”

Lyla felt her ears warm up as she relaxed into Leliana’s embrace. She only let herself stay for a moment, although it was the length of at least a few moments. “My love, we have work to do, no?”

“But of course!” Leliana giggled. “Your beautiful eyes distracted me is all, ma cherie.”

“Flattery will get you everywhere, vhenan. It got you that new position, hmm?” Lyla snorted as they sat on the bed. “So what do you have for me?”

“Not a lot, if I’m honest, love,” Leliana sighed. “I’ve looked into the information we have on the treaties with Ferelden, they are obliged to help us but they will resist it at every turn. I’ve not got many birds singing to me yet, and those that are getting in touch are giving me conflicting messages, love. I can’t say whether they’d help as they are meant to.

“Kinloch Hold, the infamous prison, is obliged to give us troops for the war. They hold the most powerful, criminal biotics the universe has, but again, there is no way to know if they will uphold their end of the bargain. Thessia, and Orzammar are on the list as well, but I have no one there to feed me information. I am working on that, Lyla, but I am sure that once the threat of this blight is evident, other planets will fall behind our banners.”

“Thank you, Leli,” Lyla smiled. “You’ve done wonderfully in the very short time I gave you, well done.”

_Medbay to Captain._

“I’m here,” Lyla responded, placing a hand on her comm badge to reply. “What is it, Wynne?”

_We think we may have something for Captain Shepard._

“One of the first bits of good news I’ve heard in a long while,” Lyla beamed. “I’ll be right there.”

“Go, love, I’ll take the bridge for a while longer yet,” Leliana chimed. She leant forward and planted a soft kiss on her wife’s nose before leaving the Captain alone.

Lyla watched her wife leave, grinning to herself as she admired the tight uniform. She shook her head to clear her mind and followed her woman out the room, crossing the bridge swiftly and arriving in the turbolift.

“Deck five,” she said with an eerie sense of Deja Vu. She had made this trip too many times today.

The lift sprung into life, shooting her down to the medbay level, and before Lyla had a chance to collect her thoughts she was there. She stepped out, bringing the Captain’s trademark scowl onto her face as she marched into the medbay.

The scientists were crowded round the body of Captain Shepard, but Lyla’s eyes were immediately drawn to Crystal. Morrigan and Isabela were finally gone, no doubt Wynne had ordered them to get food or rest, but Crystal was not alone. Cremisius Aclassi, one of her away team members. Lyla had not had a proper chance to speak to the man since she recruited him. She knew his file, knew who he was and how he got to be the great fighter he is, but who he was? That was still a mystery.

How he was feeling was not though, and the look on his face threatened to bring tears to the Captain’s eyes. His handsome face was tearstained, and his eyes were bagged. He looked up at Lyla as she approached, managing a faint salute as he stood.

“At ease, Aclassi,” She smiled as warmly as she was able, which was not very. “How is she?”

“Not good, Captain,” he quietly sobbed. “She’s gonna die isn’t she?”

“I doubt it, son,” she placed a hand on his shoulder. “She’s strong, stronger than nearly everyone on this ship. The Doctors here will save her, just you wait and see.”

“Don’t patronise me,” Krem grunted.

“Excuse me?” Lyla growled, taking a step back.

“I said, don’t patronise me, sir!” Krem spat, staring into Lyla’s eyes. “She’s dying, and it’s my fault, Captain. I don’t need you or anyone coddling me.”

“Stand down, Crewman,” Lyla thundered, jabbing his chest with her finger. “Listen to me, Cremisius. It is not your fault. I ordered Crystal to that planet, not you. I’m responsible for you all.”

“I left her,” he sobbed. “I should have been faster, smarter, better!”

“You don’t know that if could have even been fixed,” Lyla sighed. “Look, Cremisius, you need to talk to someone. Ensign Chambers from the Normandy is a counsellor. She specialises in this stuff. Go see her.”

“I don’t need a shrink, Captain,” He grunted.

“You can take it as an order or a suggestion, son, either way, you’re speaking to her. Report to her office asap,” Lyla ordered.

“Aye, aye, Captain.”

Krem saluted her once before marching out the medbay.

Lyla stepped towards the unconscious Crystal, looking at her pale beaten face, and sighed. They had a connection, they both had the tension and deep down Lyla needed someone to talk about that too. She was terrified, and no one else alive knew how she felt. “Wake up soon, falon. I’m trying to save you,” she whispered.

She leant forward, grasping Crystal’s cold shoulder and grunted in pain.

Her arm began to burn up, practically melting as heat radiated from the unconscious ensign. It pulsed up her arm and echoed throughout her chest. The world melted away as Lyla felt herself floating away.

She blinked and found herself back in that hell she had dreamt of.

Vast burning deserts rolled as far as her keen eyes could see. She spun on the spot trying to make sense of where she was when she saw someone running towards her, and heard an inhuman screech.

She sprinted towards the person, and the scream, and quickly realised what it was.

Crystal Cousland.

“Falon! I’m here!” Lyla called out, but the woman was unable to hear her. Crystal screamed as dark grey hands tore out of the sand, tearing at her body and destroying her. She fell to her knees, gasping for air and looked dead on Lyla.

“Ir abelas, lethallan,” Lyla sobbed as the hands pulled her away. “I’m trying to save you, I promise.”

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

>  
> 
> Translations
> 
> Falon – friend
> 
> Ma vhenan – my heart
> 
> Ir abelas – I’m sorry
> 
> Lethallan – close friend, practically family.


	22. The Beckonings

Crystal shrieked as she crumbled hard against the jagged surface of rock beneath the weight of yet another claw raking itself down her back. Its talons split the rags she wore for clothing and carved her open in three slick streaks. Cold crimson gushed as she grit her teeth and fought through the agony of the puncture wound.

The pincers clenched and curled beneath the surface of ripped skin while Crystal forced herself to her knees and broke free. It was through sheer utter will power she was able to make herself keep going, keep moving forward, keep… staying alive. The creature that had the ensign in a death grip screeched its ear-splitting war cry as she limped away as quickly as she could.

How long had she been doing this? How long had the monsters been terrorizing her, chasing her, hurting her? Where was she? Who was she? Was this world real? So many questions plagued her as she hobbled away through the endless dark chilling planes under the ashen sky. With every chase, and every failed escape attempt, she forgot a little more.

Crystal collapsed mid flight and went sprawling to her back as her legs suddenly refused to work.

_No. I can't give up now, not here._

Why not though? What did she have to live for? _Who_ did she have to live for? Nothing made sense anymore.

Not knowing why she bothered anymore, Crystal sat up and listened to her instincts for instruction, urging them to take over once more. She gazed down at her battered legs, dark angry bruises and gashes laid across them. The creatures after her had caught up to the ensign several times during her stay in this horrid place, wherever that place was.

Suddenly, dread filled her as the sound she came to fear most in this realm began to sound; the archdemon's song. She didn't know how she knew it was a song or how she knew it came from the one known as _archdemon_ , nor did she know how she could understand it, but she did.

Crystal crashed back to the ground as the hymn rang through the air with such a force that it caused the ensign to twitch and tremble. Vibrations rattled throughout her bones and rumbled her every aching muscle. Every creature across the planes came to a standstill and turned to face the ashen sky in perfect obedience, awaiting order.

Tears streaked the ensign's face as the familiar bloodcurdling undertone of the archdemon somehow spoke from inside her mind. The presence of the archdemon was a despairing one, all hope vanished as it demanded Crystal's soul in exchange for promises of eternal torment.

Desolation and fear in its purest form enveloped her. A darkness would flirt with her conscious each time, motioning for Crystal to come nearer and join with it. Sometimes she flirted back in hopes for death as the prize, she'd allow the dream to play out in her mind's eye and would saunter closer. The pain eased in those short-lived moments when that shapeless shadow would summon her, she called them _the beckonings_.

But each time she grew nearer, the false sense of safety would unveil itself as lies, the pain would return and she would remember to run.

"I WILL NOT BREAK!" she would scream as she turned to flee, causing her to bolt upright in her new reality and begin her waking nightmare all over again. She had been running for an eternity and longer.

She couldn't do this forever. Eventually she would have to give in and become the demon's thrall…

OoOoO

"Captain?"

"…"

"Captain Mahariel?"

"…"

"If you can hear me I need you to try to open your eyes."

Slowly, control of the elf's body was returned to her as she drifted back to reality from the hellish plane of yet another nightmare. Someone was calling her name; after a long moment, Lyla recognized the voice of Dr. Wynne and forced her lids open to reveal the snow-haired woman hovering overhead with a medical scanner in hand.

"Oh good, you're awake." Wynne helped Lyla to an upright position on the floor. Luckily, no one else was around, no one conscious anyway. "What happened? I heard a thud and found you on the floor."

The vivid scenes of burning deserts and a brutalized Crystal filled her mind all over again. "Nothing, Doctor. I must have fainted. I'm fine, really. I skipped breakfast, I just need to eat."

Wynne looked between the medical tricorder and Lyla, of course the scanner probably outed her lie.

"Look," Wynne began, shutting the scanner, "You don't have to tell me anything you don't want to but if this happens again I will be forced to examine you further. Are you certain you don't need anything from me?" Lyla rose to her feet and faced the doctor, "Not for me personally, Doctor. Can you give me an update on Crystal though? Have you noticed anything… unusual?"

Wynne drew her brows, "Actually yes, there is one thing." The doctor gestured for the elf to follow her to a nearby console and flipped on a screen with wavy lines, they moved rapidly from left to right and stayed consistent. "You're looking at a continuous scan of Crystal's brain activity. It's been this way since she returned from the planet."

"I don't understand, Doctor. What's unusual about it?"

Wynne pressed several buttons until the screen split in two, a second pattern of wave lines appeared just below Crystal's, these ones however were considerably tame compared to the ones above. Lyla was beginning to understand.

"The readings on the bottom of the screen are common with a patient who is comatose. Notice the lines barely pulsate. This is because the brain is at minimal working capacity. Crystal's readings suggest she is not only awake and active, but is in extreme distress and taking part in vigorous activity. It doesn't make any sense."

But it made sense to Lyla. That confirmed it then, she really did see Crystal, it wasn't just a dream in her head but perhaps another plane.

"Thank you, Doctor. I have to go."

Lyla rushed from the bay and headed for the science lab where she knew Liara, Miranda, and Mordin to be working on the project to revive Shephard. Lyla knew what she had to do, she had an idea how to wake her trapped crewmember, but in order to do so safely and not get imprisoned herself, she needed the only three personnel on the ship that could help.


	23. A Long Time Coming

 

"I've got an idea," Lyla called out as the door to the science lab whooshed open. "It's gonna sound crazy, lethallan, but trust me."

"Captain?" Liara questioned at the sudden intrusion.

The whole science team turned as one to look at her. Drs Lawson and Solus working on some computer terminal but looking up as Lyla took the floor.

"I can communicate with Crystal. We've been sharing our dreams," she said. Lyla let the silence and weight of what she said sink in, letting it wallow around the small laboratory for a moment longer than necessary before Liara coughed.

"Dreams, Ma'am?" She asked carefully.

"Aye, dreams," Lyla sighed as she looked at the floor. "I honestly wouldn't believe it if I wasn't experiencing it." She went on to explain everything she had felt in the dreams, all the horror and pain that Crystal had tried to convey.

"Lyla," Liara muttered. "That sounds implausible, but I trust you. It may seem unprofessional, but perhaps if we were to share a knowledge meld, you could show me the dreams? Help us understand what we need to do to help."

"I agree, Doctor," Miranda spoke up. "It's certainly not unheard of for those who have been through significant trauma to experience hallucinations. It would be pertinent to establish whether they are real or not."

"Hallucinations?" Lyla growled.

"I mean no offense, Captain, of course," Miranda stammered. "Only meaning to determine the nature of our mystery."

"Something to do with taint? Likely some telepathic nature that Darkspawn use to talk. Perhaps the tainted also talk? Would certainly explain brain activity. Small wonder Cousland won't wake. All brain activity would be focused on working with a new function. Theory, blood transfusion slowed the process, drinking accelerate?" Mordin muttered to himself. "Yes, yes, some species absorb better through digestion. Would recommend scanning both brains. Check for similarities."

"Genius, Mordin," Liara yelled. "Call the staff in the medbay now, they can monitor Crystal brain waves. Lyla, come with me to the back room, privacy would be better for this."

"No!" Miranda shouted out. "Captain, wait one moment, please. I meant to call you down here soon, T'soni and I have been working on Captain Shepard, and we think we are very close to a breakthrough. I need your permission to introduce bone weave and other upgrades. I have the nanobots ready for injection as well. She is severely injured, as you may have already guessed, but I know I can bring her back. Three or four hours are all I'd need, the doctors have already agreed to do it, they were meant to mention it to you."

"I may have rushed out on them, but you will get whatever you need, Lawson," Lyla nodded. "Get right on it. Make her your priority."

"Aye aye, Ma'am," Miranda saluted, dashing to her workstation almost immediately.

"Ok, Liara, shall we?" Lyla smiled as warmly as she could, which she realised wasn't particularly warm unless it was directed at her wife. She was a cold woman to most, and she was ok with that.

**OoOoO**

Leliana paced the bridge as her mind ran away with ideas. She was afraid to admit just how much she enjoyed intelligence gathering. Spying was as natural to her as breathing it seemed, and for all the horror Marjolaine had done to her, teaching her the tricks of the trade nearly made it all worth it. Nearly.

Marjolaine would pay one day, the woman who had broken her young heart and destroyed all semblance of innocence in her body, and beauty. Leliana had been a very proud and beautiful girl, and all that remained was pacing the bridge, a disgusting scarred husk, but Lyla loved her, and she loved Lyla. That was enough to keep her sane.

Of course, if Lyla had any idea this was what Leliana thought of herself, there would be words. 'You are beautiful, Leli!' or 'Do not be silly, my love, you are the prettiest woman I know.' Both phrases Lyla had uttered on more than one occasion. Leliana didn't believe them, she never could, but she believed that Lyla believed them. That was enough to keep her sane.

She had once lost herself into the darkness that being a BARD, Brief And Reconnaissance Defence agent, came with, but it was different now. She hoped.

Marjolaine had played both sides and only cared for herself, and the Chantry only cared for itself, the Grey Wardens were trying to save the universe. That was more than worth the risk of losing herself again. Lyla would keep her grounded, though, Leliana knew that. She had saved her from that life once before, and Leliana trusted her to do so again if need be.

She was still scared it wouldn't be enough to keep her sane.

She had already sent the few agents she could recruit from the other stations, those from the Normandy and those who needed a change. A Lace Harding was her most promising agent, and Leliana had put her in charge of scouting ahead to where Lyla sent them. So for now, she was just sitting around in an office reading. Poor thing.

"Captain on the bridge!" Someone shouted as the elevator door hissed.

Leliana span in place, a smile growing on her face before she even saw the love of her life. "I stand relieved, my love."

"I'm pretty sure that 'my love' counts as insubordination, but for you, Leli, I'll allow it," Lyla smirked, crinkling the gorgeous tattoos on her face.

"Well, I missed you, _Captain_ ," Leliana giggled, "I've not seen you since this morning. I hope your day was more productive than mine."

"Oh? Not very productive, vhenan?"

"Well there's only so much I can do whilst we fly back to headquarters, love," Leliana smiled.

"Belay that order," Lyla sighed, rubbing the back of her neck. "I don't want us moving until Crystal and Shepard are dealt with. Crystal and I are infected, I have realised we cannot risk that infection getting to the other Wardens. The people on this ship will be tested, of course, but for now, we are on our own."

She strolled over to her chair and sat down, pressing the intercom button as she did so. "Griffon, this is your Captain speaking. Our family has grown, and some of you may not recognise my voice, or who I am. I am Lyla Mahariel, Tempest of the Wardens. I know you will have heard stories of my brutality, or other horrific things, they are all true. I will do what it takes to win this war against the darkspawn. That monster that attacked the Normandy, your ship, our family, will pay. We will take the fight to it, I don't know how or when but it will fall to us. I will show it what happens when you piss me off.

"I do have good news, though," She sighed, "Captain Shepard will be waking up within the hour. I will debrief her myself, and then when she is able and willing, I will allow any of you who wish to do so to thank her. Mahariel out."

"Good speech, Cap," The pilot laughed.

"Thank you, Flight Lieutenant," Lyla smiled. "Leliana, arrange a holo call to Headquarters in two hours, I will wake Shepard and talk to them with her."

"Of course, Captain."

"I'm beginning to think this is going to work," Lyla groaned. "Oh, Creators, that's a bad sign, isn't it?"

Leliana giggled.


	24. Synaptic Safety

Liara held her head in her hands as she sat on the edge of the bed in her new quarters aboard the GWS Griffon. She had meant to head back to the science lab to confer with Mordin and Miranda on what she had learned from the meld, but her feet had decided to walk right past the lab and into her quarters.

Still trembling, the shocked asari rose from the bed and stepped inside the private restroom to splash her face in hopes of regaining control of her senses.

The chill of the refreshing liquid revitalized her but didn't make the harsh nightmare Lyla had shown her fade any further. No better could she handle the sensations or experiences as she relived the vision over and over again as if she were still there.

How the captain kept her wits about her and maintained a mask of calm Liara could not understand. She wondered what other nightmares and secrets the elf harbored and kept hidden from those around her.

Granted, asaris had heightened senses compared to other races, but had anyone else aboard experienced that dream they would surely be far more rattled and shaken than the headstrong leader of the Griffon.

There was no doubt the dream was real and Lyla was telling the truth. And more importantly, a way to communicate with the unconscious crewmember. Liara thrashed her head side to side in a failed attempt to shake the images of Crystal's bloody features and agonizing screech. The asari let out a shaky breath and stared straight ahead at herself in the mirror.

Over and over her mind played out the scenario to have taken place between Lyla, Crystal, and a strange mirror-like barrier. There was something odd about the barrier and Crystal being trapped behind it. Was there something she missed?

She knew she needed to speak with the other doctors but her mind seemed prudent to work on its own first. She closed her eyes as her mind led her down a path she couldn't see. Was it on to something? It was like her thoughts were no longer her own. It was like someone else had taken control and began steering the images.

Suddenly, the barrier appeared before her mind's eye once more. Vast and bright and mysterious with all its magnificence. A bloody handprint all that's left in the wake of recent events. There was something here, in this scene, some insignificance she was overlooking but what?

Gripping the edges of the sink hard, Liara let out a frustrated groan before storming back to the bed and lying down. She just needed to rest; she just needed to think…

A click of the com badge on her chest startled her before she could piece any more together.

_Dr. Lawson to Dr. T'soni_.

With a sigh, Liara pressed the badge. " Dr. T'soni here."

_Shephard's been prepped for surgery to upgrade and restore internal function. Please join us as soon as possible so we can begin._

"On my way."

OoOoO

Liara hovered over the unconscious Commander Shephard as she tied her doctor's mask in place. She took a deep breath before focusing all her energy on the task at hand.

"Ready to install human ablation armor beneath L5 implant tissues," came Mordin's quick string of facts.

The salarian scientist stood opposite the operating table as Liara. He focused animatedly on a view screen he held in his hands while observing Liara's work with absolute precision. The screen showed continuous scans of the patient's insides while Liara worked from the exterior. The surgery was a delicate one and had little room for error. If the asari misaligned a single neuron-stream by even a mere centimeter, her patient could die.

"Eaaaasy," Mordin cooed.

Liara let out a slow, careful breath as she held down the switch of the medical cryo-spanner and gently glided it across Shephard's torso. The damaged flesh slowly mended and transformed to millions of tiny micro-engineered shielding inhibitors.

It was all an experiment really. What they were doing had never been done. If it worked and they succeeded in reviving Shephard, it would be an incredible scientific breakthrough.

"Heartrate rising…" Miranda announced warningly. "Dammit, the patient is destabilizing. Initiating biotic charge." Liara halted her ministrations and glanced toward Dr. Lawson who was tapping away wildly at a nearby console.

Revitalizing dead blood cells proved an impossibility, so naturally, Dr. Solus decided to substitute the substance with another containing electro-platelets that could be manipulated into self-efficiency. The problem they were encountering now, however, was getting Shephard's heart to accept the foreign matter.

Nearly every organ of Shephard was now altered in some way by tech. Liara didn't know how much time had past since she first entered that room to begin the surgery. They were nearing the end and to have finished without problem would have been too good to be true.

All they had to finish was sealing in the patient's ablation exterior and resetting the ocular synaptic processers. If this worked, Shephard would be the most advanced android in history. Half human or not.

"Stabilized," Miranda announced. "Twenty percent nominal flow."

"Increase the output," Mordin ordered as he tapped the device in his hand. "Excellent. All energetic materials efficient and rising. Fourteen percent. Thirty-five percent. Finish now Dr. T'soni."

Liara nodded before resuming her steady glide of the laser. They were almost there. There was only one thing left to do afterward. "Done," she said a few minutes later.

Miranda nodded before handing the asari an injection needle as long as her forearm. Liara took it carefully in both hands before aiming it at Shephard's stomach. Everyone in the room seemed to be holding their breath.

They all understood the serum in that injector was their last hope, it was the final tie of engineered dark matter that would revive the very fabric of life in a patient hovering at the brink of death. Were it not to work; all their efforts would have been for nothing. Not to mention Crystal's chances of waking would drop considerably. They could win or lose everything within the next few moments. Everything rested on the result of the serum.

With a shaky breath, Liara inserted the needle and pressed the trigger.


	25. In Death, Sacrifice

There was silence for a long moment as the whole room held their breath, and for an even longer moment, nothing happened.

Shepard gasped for air, and the silence shattered.

Collectively the whole room relaxed, the medics rushed to her side as the scientists congratulated themselves on a job well done.

Liara walked up to Miranda and Mordin, shaking their hands in celebration. “Well done, my friends,” She smiled warmly. “You’ve practically raised the dead.”

“We did it quicker than three days as well,” Miranda laughed. “Take that, God.”

“God? Three days. Ah, Earth religion. The myth of Son of God coming from dead after three days. Interesting. Self-indulgent but perhaps,” Mordin muttered to himself. “Lazarus Project, that is the name. Taken from your same mythology.”

“Sounds good to me, Mordin,” Miranda nodded. “Can we perhaps use this Lazarus project to help Crystal then?”

“Brain waves need checking. Hmm, need to check similarities in chemical composition as well. Lawson, I have ideas,” Mordin quickly said.

“Good,” Liara ordered, “get to work. I want you two concentrating on waking Crystal. If Lyla is right about the dreams being connected, it would be easier to work through that if we can communicate with Crystal as well. I will monitor Shepard and ensure that our work doesn’t go wrong.”

“Aye aye, Ma’am,” Miranda saluted.

The pair of scientists left their lead to her own devices, and Liara smiled to herself as the elation of a job well done washed over her. They had done it. Shepard was going to survive, Goddess knows what she would be thinking, a near death experience would change anyone, but her body was sound.

**OoOoO**

“Welcome back to the land of the living, Jane,” Dr. Chakwas whispered as she took the hand of her former Captain.

Liara pushed through the small crowd and took her place next to the woman, monitoring the equipment as Shepard began to wake.

“Fuck me,” Jane mumbled, and Liara jumped. “Feels like a thousand elcor have been stomping on my head.”

“Somehow, Captain, that would have been less damaging. I’m afraid you crashed into a planet,” Chakwas laughed. “Only you could be so melodramatic.”

“Oh,” Shepard whispered. “I remember. I thought I was going to die.”

“If it weren't for the Griffon and the work of their and our science teams, you would have,” Chakwas smiled warmly as she squeezed the Captain’s hand.

“Did the crew survive?” She asked, staring deep into the doctor’s eyes.

“Every single one of them, Jane. You’re a hero,” the doctor said. She released her hand and stood back an inch or two. “We need to run some tests, Captain, but before that, I’d like to introduce one of the women who saved you. Dr. Liara T’soni.”

Liara visibly jumped as the doctor said her name. She felt her cheeks go purple as she blushed, and as she turned to face the bed-ridden hero, she prayed to the goddess it wasn’t obvious.

“Thank you, Dr. T’soni,” Shepard’s eyes sparkled as she spoke. Liara blushed harder and looked away as they made eye contact. “I owe you a debt I could never repay.”

“I… I was just doing my job, Captain. I’d save anyone I could. Not that you're unimportant to me, or important to me! Goddess, I’m just going to stop talking.”

Shepard laughed a wondrous, rhythmic sound that shone through Liara like the sun on a warm day. Something about this woman just felt right, and Liara couldn’t help the smile that formed on her face.

“Please call me Jane, or Shepard at least. I don’t think I’m even a Captain now, I’ve no ship after all.” Shepard sighed. “Rest in peace, you beautiful tin can.”

“Aye, God bless the Normandy,” Chakwas saluted.

Liara nodded her head solemnly.

“Sorry to interrupt,” A voice rang out from the doorway. “I need to speak to Shepard.” Liara turned and saluted as she realised it was the voice of Lyla.

She made a terrifyingly powerful presence as she parted the waves of people with nothing more than a glance. She was leadership personified, and Liara was very grateful she was on their side.

She stood before the bed, on the opposite side of Liara and the medical doctors, her hands behind her back and a sly smile on her face.

“I’ll need some privacy,” She ordered. “Dr’s T’Soni, Wynne, and Chakwas can run their tests later. We have some business to discuss, Shepard.”

Liara turned back to look at the bed-ridden Captain and was shocked to see the smirk on Jane’s face.

As the ocean leaves the shore of Thessia, the group left the med-bay, only the two Captains remained.

**OoOoO**

“Mahariel, please tell me that was a bottle of whiskey I saw behind you back,” Shepard eagerly gasped.

“Afraid not, lethallan,” Lyla laughed as she sat down and held the dangerously orange bottle out for the recovering Captain to see. “Dragon Piss. I thought it seemed appropriate considering our prey.”

“you have a sick sense of humour,” Shepard laughed as she took the bottle. She uncorked it, and Lyla snorted as Shepard's face grimaced at the smell.

“It tastes even worse than it smells,” Lyla laughed as she produced two small tumblers. “But, you’re a bloody hero, shem, you deserve the celebration. Riordan did the same for me after my first near-death experience.”

“Oh hell, did he give you that same vinegar tasting wine? Disgusting piss,” Shepard smirked as Lyla poured their drinks.

“From the smell of this stuff though, my friend, we might be begging for that wine after this,” Lyla grimaced.

She passed a glass over to her friend and held her drink up high for a toast. “Here’s to us. Who’s like us?”

“Damn few, and they’re all dead,” Shepard finished. They clinked their drinks together and knocked them back in sync.

“Mythal’enaste,” Lyla spat. “That is easily the most disgusting thing I have ever drank.”

She poured another drink as Shepard cursed. “Oh fuck off, Mahariel, really?”

“That one was for you, Shepard. We’ve lost people already. This is to honour them,” Lyla grimaced as her mind flew back to Alistair, her old friend, but she shook her head, and the apparition disappeared.

“Aye, ok. Pour me another then, damnable elf,” Jane poked her tongue out.

Lyla passed the drink over, and they held them up in toast once more. “In War, Victory. In Peace, Vigilance.”

“In Death, Sacrifice,” Shepard continued. “Gone but never forgotten.”

 


	26. The Glare of a Monster

Lyla tossed and turned the night following Shephard's revival. She had ordered the science teams to get some well-deserved rest after the day-long surgery. She was proud of what her team had accomplished. Of course she wanted to wake Crystal as soon as possible but didn't want to push her luck.

She needed her team ready, rested, and at their best when dealing with the ensign. Morrigan, Isabela, and the doctors had been informed Crystal's awakening would take place first thing in the morning. If Lyla could make it to morning that is.

The elf had yet again been plagued with another nightmare. The same recurring dream of the magnificent mirror amidst the most luscious but unsettling of forests. Crystal's face taunted her from the other side of the transparent glass.

Her orbs as black as the galaxy and mouth hanging in a permanently horrified o. A muted scream that deafened the elf to no end. She remembered wanting to save her friend but couldn't. Crystal's eyeless stare continued to bleed out as Lyla pounded the barrier locking the ensign away from her.

With renewed commitment, Lyla took several steps back from the archway. With a running start, she dashed for the mirror with a furious war cry. Determined to sacrifice her own life if that's what it took to bring the girl home.

When elf met barrier, there was a blinding flash of light then… nothing.

Thrashing in the sheets, Lyla sat straight up drenched in sweat. Her heart thundered so hard in her chest she was certain it would break the confinements of its cage.

Leliana stirred beside her, heavy lids fluttered open with worried eyes once she noticed the state of her wife. The spymaster sat up immediately and wrapped the captain in the tightest of embraces.

"Lyla? Come here ma vhenan. What's happened?"

An involuntary tremble jolted through the elf as she hugged her wife back. She was so grateful to have Leliana at that moment. With a plethora of dreadful emotions from the dream still hanging over her, Lyla couldn't help but realize just how fortunate she was.

And now she truly had an inkling to what Morrigan and Isabela were going through without Crystal. Had Leliana and Crystal's conditions been reversed, Lyla didn't know how she'd get through it.

Now more determined than ever, Lyla was ready to bring back that shem she called friend.

OoOoO

A few hours later, after much prayer in her private alcove and readying for the day, Lyla found herself in sickbay along with Liara, Doctors Chakwas, Wynne, Morrigan, and Isabela.

Leliana had insisted on accompanying the elf that morning, especially after hearing about the nightmare with Crystal but Lyla needed her on the bridge until at least Shephard or Hawke were fit for duty. She trusted no one else.

The captain's eye fell on the back of the bay where rested a still sleeping Hawke. Wynne had informed her earlier that the Lt. Commander would be waking any day now and would make a complete recovery. Lyla snickered at the sleeping Mabari war hound laying beside the biobed. She'd heard the dog had yet to leave Hawke's side since she saved the beast.

"Alright, we're ready to begin," Liara announced.

The asari approached the unconscious Crystal with the largest needle Lyla had ever seen. She silently thanked the gods the ensign wasn't awake for this part.

Morrigan and Isabela stood off to the side, giving the doctors ample room to work. Morrigan had a long arm wrapped around the pilot who held Morrigan around the waist with a protective arm of her own. Lyla admired the support the two women showed for one another.

Wynne tapped away at a console while Dr. Chakwas disconnected the tubing from Crystal's body. "Patient is ready to receive the serum. Whenever you're ready, Dr. T'soni."

With a firm nod, Liara lifted the injector high into the air before aiming it at a practiced angle at the ensign's stomach. In one steady glide the long needle pierced the patient, there was a small hiss as the doctor pressed down on the trigger that released the serum. Lyla doubted anyone but her could hear it the noise was so faint.

For several moments, the room fell to complete silence. No one moved, Lyla wasn't even sure if anyone dared to breathe. She was about to ask how long it would take for Crystal to wake when a heavy weight settled in her chest.

The feeling was a peculiar one, like an overbearing sense of dread. The weight of the emotion so fierce it threatened to bring the captain to her knees. Beckoning her to a glooming light.

"Something's wrong," she gasped. Why was she breathing so hard? Gathering her strength, Lyla lifted her arms and stepped forward, gesturing for everyone to move away. "Stand back! Now! That's an order! All of you!"

Just as the words left her mouth, Crystal's eyes shot open to reveal two orbs of endless black. No whites, no pupils, no iris'. Just the glare of a monster. At first, Crystal didn't move. Not until Isabela rushed forward unexpectedly that is.

Without warning, Crystal shot a hand out without moving from the bed to clutch the pilot by the throat. Pale, veiny fingers squeezed so tight Bela's neck turned red and face paled to the same sick shade of the ensign strangling her.

All at once everyone in the room rushed forward, everyone trying to restrain their patient and free Isabela as tears streamed the pilot's face and she continued gasping for air. Dr. Chakwas tried to hold down the ensign's other arm, but Crystal somehow managed to slip through and clutch the doctor in the same death grip.

Liara backed away with a look of shock before tapping her comm badge. "Liara to security. Officers report to sickbay immediately."

After receiving confirmation, Liara nodded at Lyla who only just finally managed to pry Crystal's fingers from Isabela's neck. Crystal sat straight up, anger evident in her brows while her lips sported a thin emotionless line. Lyla couldn't read her, what was happening?

Racing to the other side, Lyla tried to pry the other fingers cutting off Dr. Chakwas' air supply. Only seconds later did Wynne step in and jam a needle into the ensign's neck did Crystal fall unconscious again.

"It seems Crystal has succumbed to the taint," Wynne said sadly. "There is nothing more we can do for her."

There was a shriek and grief-stricken whimper to sound from the side of the room as Morrigan and Isabela fell to their knees, holding each other close and sobbing uncontrollably. Their cries of devastation sent a shiver through the elf and scorched her mind in a way she would never forget.

Tears stung her own eye, but she refused them. She turned at the familiar hiss of the door opening, announcing the presence of two security officers. They looked to Lyla for direction.

Swallowing hard and sliding the well-practiced mask of confidence back in place she said, "Take Crystal to the brig. She's a threat to us all."


	27. A Nice Surprise

“Mythal’enaste,” Lyla grunted as she collapsed upon the small chair. She had travelled to the office in the medical bay after Security took Crystal, and the rest of the crowd had left. She had ordered the room cleared, with only the vital crewmen there, with the rest going to their quarters. Her head rang horrendously and she still had the sickening feeling in her mind of danger. She had never experienced anything like it. “Fuck!” She screamed, throwing a mug across the room and threw the large glass window.

“Captain?” Dr Wynne shouted in alarm. “Are you ok?”

“As ok as I can be,” Lyla growled as she stalked out of the room, “Wake Hawke when you can, I have questions for her,” she called out as she continued her march out of the med bay.

Duncan had been the only Tainted man they had ever met, and Hawke had spent the most time with him, apart from the late Alistair. If anyone had any ideas of how to treat the taint it would be him.

Losing a crew member was difficult and Lyla abhorred telling the next of kin, especially when she was close friends with one of them. Morrigan and Lyla had been through a lot together, and whilst neither of them would admit it, they relied on each other heavily. She was an amazing engineer, studying practices that Lyla would never have even imagined, and it had proved invaluable in the fits they had been in before this “Blight”.

This was worse however, as Crystal was still alive. She was a danger to herself, and Lyla suspected the whole crew. She would have to treat the ensign as lost in action for now, any extra hope would destroy her. She had to quarantine Crystal, she realised and that meant her partners could not see her. That order would have to wait however, for now she had the unfortunate job of informing Crystal’s partners of her quarantine.

Lyla stomped through the halls as she parted the crew before her, all of them sensing the anger radiating off her and wisely moving. She arrived at the turbo lift and gruffly barked out the floor number.

**OoOoO**

Shepard groaned as she turned the corner. She had been dismissed from the med bay, a full recovery from near death. Not a bad start to her day really, but the headache from the piss Lyla had given her the day before put a dampener on it. She was grateful, don’t get her wrong, but the hangover felt like she was dying, and strangely she knew what that was like.

She chuckled to herself at her idiotic irony and cast her usual cocky smile on her face. She was lost, this ship was completely different to the Normandy, practically a country to the Normandy’s little village. For the last twenty minutes she had been aimlessly wandering throughout the halls and corridors, wearing the signature frown of a Captain with a lot on her mind. That being her hangover.

The original Normandy crew nodded and saluted as they saw her walking, but they recognised her face and realised she had things to get on with. Oh, if only they knew how little Shep had to do. She laughed in silly misery and took the next left door she saw. Always go left, that was her motto, apparently.

“Shepard!” A familiar voice called out in surprise, “I wasn’t expecting to see you up and about so soon. What are you doing here?”

Shepard looked towards the voice and saw Dr T’Soni, one of her saviours. “I came here to thank you, Doctor,” she lied seamlessly. Smooth, Shepard, smooth.

“Oh!” Liara blushed, “there was really no need! It’s my job to save you, as I said before. But, correct me if I am wrong, Shepard, but you’ve already thanked me once. I am sure you are as lovely, I mean kind as your crew make out, but kind enough to seek me out?”

“Aye, well,” Shepard stumbled. Not so smooth, anymore, eh? “I’m lost.” Now it was Shepard’s turn to blush. “It is a nice surprise to see such a friendly face though, don’t get me wrong.”

“It is a nice surprise! But, you’re lost? Oh Goddess, of course!” Liara smiled, “I’m sure this ship is a bit different than what you are used to. I could call one of the crewman to give you a tour if you’d like, Shepard?”

“Oh, no need. My blind luck brought me to you for a reason, I’m sure,” Shepard laughed. “Perhaps you’d care to join me for some food? I’m pretty convinced you’re working too hard, and Lyla won’t complain too much in you taking a lunch break.”

“But I’ve brought something with me…” Liara grumbled.

“Oh pish posh, come on, T’Soni!” Shepard insisted, taking the asari by the arm. “I outrank you, I’ll make it an order if I have to!”

“Very well,” Liara giggled,” just give me one moment to shut down my workstation.”

“What are you working on, anyway?” Shepard inquired.

“The Captain has a theory on how to save Ensign Cousland. You know, the poor woman who was tainted? Well she woke up and is not herself to say the least. Lyla has an idea that those who are tainted have interconnected dreams. I concur and after some testing, I believe I can work within an asari meld and… I’m sorry, that was too much information wasn’t it?”

“No!” Shepard jumped up, she had leant on her arms against Liara’s desk. “I promise, Doctor.”

“Don’t lie to me,” Liara smirked, “I saw your eye’s glazing over. I know when I blabber on, don’t you worry. I’m sure you didn’t want to spend your lunch break talking about work.”

“Very intuitive, Doctor,” Shepard smiled, “How about we talk about something much more interesting to me.” Shepard held out and arm and ignored the way her heartbeat accelerated as Liara took it. “Why don’t you tell me about yourself?”

Smooth, Shepard, smooth.


	28. Respite

Lyla stared bleary-eyed off into the distance of the Dales as the dread of the morning's events settled over her. Having to give the order to ban Morrigan and Isabela from seeing their lover had shaken the captain to her core.

Never had she seen such heartbreak, such desolation, in the eyes of another. The two women had looked like they'd been sentenced to a punishment worse than death. Lyla hadn't allowed her emotions to show, she refused the tears threatening her eye as she always did. Even _after_ Isabela lunged toward her with an all-consuming nothing-to-lose war cry.

The image of Isabela's fierce look of rage burned into the elf's memory as the pirate's once fun-loving, humorous, friendly nature turned into something unrecognizable, frightening, and almost feral. Luckily, Morrigan's quick reflexes had caught the brunette midflight and held her back.

Lyla could always depend on the level-headed engineer to carry out wisdom and restraint in any situation no matter how distressing. Aside from her incredulous aptitude for engineering, it was why Lyla made her Chief Engineer.

Morrigan's expression, however, was one of stone, unreadable and feigned with an unnatural aura of calm no shem should ever be capable of masking. She had held Bela close and gently urged the broken pirate away. Lyla relieved them both of duty for the next several days and suggested they return to their quarters but couldn't help but wonder…

Had Morrigan died inside? She had never seen the engineer in such a state. Did Lyla kill her too?

Lyla sniffled as a single tear finally broke free and cascaded a pale cheek. She was responsible for every crew member aboard, and in a matter of days she had lost Duncan, Alistair, Crystal, and now have perhaps destroyed two more. Even if the effects _were_ inadvertent.

So much death. How many more would there be? She had to end the cycle. She needed to stop the spiral before it dared reach for the ones she loved most, like _Leliana_. Her priorities kept circling around her wife. She had to be better. She had to protect her family. Merrill, Hawke, so many depended on her. The Griffon crew as well as Shephard's crew now.

The weight of command finally began to weigh heavily on the grief-stricken captain. She shifted on the log beneath her as she continued to stare straight ahead. She sat atop a high-raised hill overlooking the forest mimicking her homeworld. The sun peeked over the edge of the forest's treeline, promising the arrival of yet another day.

This was Lyla's favorite program. The closest she could come to regaining a sense of home and was pleased with every last detail. Every broken branch and winding path was just where she remembered.

A warm arm draped itself over Lyla's shoulders causing her to look up into a caring gaze reflecting the color of tree bark. It was her adoptive mother, Ashalle. In her haste, Lyla had charged straight to the holodeck in search of respite without a second thought and had forgotten to deactivate the program's characters.

"No matter how dark the night, morning always comes, da'len _(little one)_."

Warmth spread through Lyla, and she leaned against Ashalle's shoulder. Without requiring a word of explanation, the woman always knew just what the elf needed to hear in her time of need. Lyla closed her eyes and let out a careful breath as the screams of Morrigan and Bela from the med bay earlier continued to echo throughout her mind's ear.

The short hairs on her arms stood at attention, their shrieks reverberated through her soul with an eternal promise to haunt her for the remainder of her days. She would never forget. She _could_ never forget.

Usually, in her grief, Lyla would fight out the tension threatening to strangle her inside but when the piercing screams of Crystal's partners scorched her mind indefinitely, all Lyla could think about was what if things had been reversed. What if it had been Leliana in that biobed and woken up a darkspawn? All hope lost?

It had been a traumatic day and zapped Lyla's energy, strength, and concentration completely. There was still so much to do. Decisions to be made.

She needed to get in contact with the grey wardens, promote Shephard to second in command, and make the hard choice of how to deal with Crystal's state. If she turned the ensign over to the embassy, she'd surely be experimented on with little regard to comfort or well-being.

"Ahem. Lyla?"

Lyla straightened and glanced over her shoulder to see a crippled looking Hawke standing a few feet away. Her hair was dishevelled, odd ends sticking out in places and she gripped her side while hunched over. Overall, though, she looked okay which brought the elf great relief.

"Computer, delete character." In an instant, Ashalle shimmered and dissipated into nothingness. Lyla patted the log beside her for Hawke to sit. As Hawke hobbled over, Lyla noticed a small worn book in the brunette's free hand. "Are you alright lethallan ( _close friend_ )? Shouldn't you still be in sick bay?"

Hawke chuckled as she made herself comfortable. "I tried to raise you on the comm, but you weren't answering. I had to have the computer locate you."

Lyla forgot she had disabled communications when she came to the holodeck. She had desperately needed to be alone. "Sorry, lethallan. What's brought you here? Are you at least feeling better?"

"I'll be fine, Lyla. The walk has done me good anyway. Here, I brought you this." Hawke handed the elf the small, rugged journal. It was heavier than it looked and made of leather. Lyla handled it like a precious artifact. "Dr. Wynne said you asked for me. After hearing what happened to Crystal, I had a feeling you wanted this. I saw Duncan take it with him the day I showed him to his room. Luckily, he left it behind. I didn't read it thoroughly but saw a few pages mentioned the taint and ritual process. Maybe you'll find something helpful."

Lyla placed a hand on Hawke's shoulder and did her best to smile. "Thank you, Marian."

Hawke nodded before standing. "I'm going to go find Merrill now. I just wanted to give you that on the way. Let's have dinner soon, lethallan."

Lyla nodded and waited for the brunette to disappear from view before turning back to Duncan's journal. Her heart fluttered for some unknown reason as she gripped the edges of the book. With a long breath and silent prayer to the gods for answers, Lyla opened to the middle of the journal and gasped.


	29. Hidden Truths

Lyla dropped the book in disgust, it must have been lying. It must have. Secrets that she would never tell another being, something she could not tell anyone. It was too late for her, and possibly Crystal, but the others? They would never know, not unless it was too late.

Lyla tore the page from the book and ripped it to small pieces. Her soul was torn asunder with it, and she sobbed as the revelations of the last few days, and the revelations from the journal overtook her.

"Get up," a voice echoed throughout the forest. "Get up and act like the proud Dalish you are, da'len."

Marethari, her clan's keeper. Lyla recognised that voice immediately. "Computer, dele-"

"Not so fast please, da'len, you need to hear this," Marethari growled. "We are leaders, you and I. What happened to you was my responsibility, Lyla Mahariel, but did you see me break down? No! Because I am a leader and I make the hard choices and stay hard for those that need me. Get up, get strong, and stay strong for your people."

"Computer, delete character," Lyla growled. She hated how right Marethari was, and remembered the very same conversation they had had when Lyla left the clan. That was a long time ago but it still shaped her.

She opened the book at the front, hoping beyond hopes that Duncan would have at least labelled where everything was. Alas, he hadn't. She cursed her youth and the lack of reading education she had received as she slowly turned the pages, hoping for anything that could help.

It was fruitless.

By the time she slowly read the journal, Crystal would be dead, or worse.

She growled in frustration, a sound she was used to making and decided to take the book to the woman who had taught her to read, her own wife Leliana.

If there was anyone who could help them now it was her, and as Lyla shut down the holoprogram and left, she called ahead. "Lyla to Leliana, come in."

_I'm here for you, Lyla, what is it?_

"Love, I've a book you need to read for me." Lyla smiled as she heard her wife's voice.

_Oh yes, is it a romance perhaps? You know how I love those._

"I'm afraid not, my darling, its Duncan's journal. I can't read it fast enough to find anything. Meet me and Liara in the meeting room, please, my dear."

Next, she commed to Liara, hoping the scientist had more plans. "Dr T'soni, come in please,"

_Lyla!_ Liara's voice came through the comm in a gasp.

"Are you ok, Liara?" Lyla inquired with a sigh, this was all she needed.

_Oh perfectly fine! I was just not expecting you to call me, at least not now whilst I was…. Anyway, what can I do for you?_

Lyla could practically hear the blush Liara was wearing and laughed to herself. "Calm down, lethallan, I've found something that could help us. Can you meet Leliana and me in the meeting room ASAP?"

_Looks like our dinner is cut short._ Another voice came over the comm, very quiet and only Lyla's elven hearing allowed her to hear it. Shepard.

"Bring Shepard too, Li, she could offer a fresh perspective."

_Aye, Captain._

Lyla laughed as she heard the embarrassment in Liara's voice. It was cute, and Lyla was delighted that someone was treating Shepard well. Hopefully Shepard would treat Liara the same way.

**OoOoO**

Lyla sat on the table watching her wife skim the pages of the book. It was always astounding to her just how much faster Leliana was at reading. What would have taken Lyla the better part of a week took her human less than a day. It was scarily impressive.

They were still waiting for Liara and Shepard and Lyla was happy enough to just watch her wife until then. She lay down on the table, letting her legs hang off the side as she rested her head in front of Leliana.

"Do you know how hard it is to concentrate when I can see your gorgeous face?" Leliana smiled without looking up.

Lyla felt her whole face warm up, from the bottom of her chin to the tips of her long ears, she knew she was as red as can be, and she didn't care. Only Leliana could make her feel this way.

"Oh, shall I leave you to it then, vhenan," Lyla giggled, beginning to sit up.

Leliana moved faster than Lyla would have guessed, resting the book on Lyla's tummy as she winked at her wife. "Don't you dare, I need a table."

"Whatever you say, love," Lyla laughed out loud. "I love you."

"I know," Leliana stuck her tongue out. "You're distracting me, just lie there and look pretty, won't you?"

Her face felt on fire as she blushed once more, the butterflies in her stomach threatened to fly away but Lyla was happy, happier than she felt she deserved to be. But no one truly got what they deserved.

"I never knew the Tempest could blush!" Shepard laughed as she held the door open for Liara. "Good to know you have some weaknesses."

"She only has one," Leliana snorted as she continued reading, "me."

"Don't underestimate her though," Lyla winked towards Shepard. "Leliana is the scary one here."

"I don't doubt it, you're not at all scary!" Shepard sat down as she teased, sitting opposite Leliana at the other side of the rectangular table. Leliana was sitting on the corner of one of the longer sides, leaving the head of the table for Lyla, which was were the elf's legs were currently dangling.

She stood up and looked across at the four of them.

"We have three things to discuss, my friends," she began, "all of them important but first I would like to address Crystal. Liara, tell me you've figured something out?"

"We meld, then you touch Crystal. You said that was how you first got into her mind. I will meld with you both and see what she sees. I'm hoping, and hoping is a strong word, that we can save her from the hell she is in." Liara spoke softly, staring at the table.

"Agreed, it's all we can do," Lyla nodded. "Tonight we will do it. Prepare yourself and warn the security. Leliana, anything in the book yet?"

"I've found how to make more wardens, how to do it the way you were made. There are also passages describing how those wardens can sense the taint in the darkspawn. That sounds immensely useful, I suggest we start making more wardens," Leliana looked up from the book for the first time, staring to her wife's eyes, and jumping at the fear she saw in Lyla's emeralds.

"No!" Lyla growled. "Not yet. I am not risking anyone until we can be sure Crystal is ok. If I have to be the only tainted warden I will. I need you to read on the taint, Leliana, see if there is any cure, anything at all. I need it by tonight. You're dismissed, you too, Liara."

Leliana saluted, blew a kiss and left with the Doctor. Leaving Shepard and Lyla alone.

"I think we need to talk, Jane," Lyla groaned. "We need to inform Weisshaupt."

"Oh those old bastards won't listen!" Shepard spat. "We both know they'll bury their heads in the sand and ignore the threat. Anything to acknowledge we need help! Anything to avoid spending the money and troops they've collected."

"I know," Lyla dropped her voice to a whisper. "That's why we need to talk. We're telling them the truth and when they ignore us, we are going rogue. This is a true blight, a true threat to the whole universe."

Shepard sat back, resting her hands behind her head and smirked. "Goddamn, I need a cigar. That's the best thing you've ever said, my friend. I agree. We need to give the crew the option to leave though. We can mutiny but it is unfair to bring them down with us. Give them a chance to return to tradition. One thing though, if we are starting again, we need strong leadership, not two Captains."

"Aye, well we have to work with what we have," Lyla sighed. "One thing at a time, yes?"

"You misunderstand, Mahariel. This is your ship, my ship is gone. I'll take a demotion to Commander, you stay Captain. I'll be your first officer," Shepard stood as she spoke, saluting her new captain.

"Very well, but this is just a formality. I will run everything by you," Lyla promised. "But now we need to call headquarters."

"Aye, after we save Crystal though. One thing at a time. Any hints of rebellion from headquarters could leak back here. We can't risk mutiny." Shepard spoke quietly. "We also need to remove any and all monitoring devices from the ship. They had planted more than enough on the Normandy. I'll speak to Mordin, he took them out of my ship. I trust him."

"Aye, use Merrill too, she has a knack for seeing things others don't," Lyla smiled. "Dismissed, Shepard. Get to work."

"Aye, Captain."

Lyla watched the human leave and her confidence surged. They would defeat this blight, there was no room for error, but they would not make any.


	30. The Blame Game

Lyla made her way toward the turbolift with verve in her step. A small, undeserved flutter of excitement ballooned in her chest as the doors slid closed. "Deck three."

She took a sharp, exhilarated breath before shaking out her anxious nerves. When the doors hissed open to reveal the hall that was home to the nicer rooms of the ship, Lyla headed straight for Morrigan's room without falter.

The redhead smirked and shook her head as she passed each room. She had made herself familiar with every mere micrometer of her ship over the years. She knew just how much bigger in size the quarters on deck three were to her own.

Although she and Leliana didn't require much in the way of space, the elf often found it rather amusing the captain's quarters was similar in size to those of the lower ranking officers of the crew; including cleaners, cooks, scaffold scrubbers and sewage recyclers.

Only Lieutenant ranking officers got to live on this deck. Luckily for Isabela and Crystal, they're relationship with Morrigan had earned them a cushy living environment. In addition to a sonic shower, basic bedroom, and food replicator; the girls had access to a large standing shower, bathtub, spacious living area, a bed triple in size to the captain's, and a fully equipped kitchenette.

Lyla remembered hearing a rumour once that Crystal liked to cook for those closest to her and was in fact, a very talented chef, but the elven captain had yet to witness the deed herself.

With a sad sigh, Lyla thought of those dark abysmal orbs for eyes that filled Crystal's skull now. Hardening her mask, she silently vowed to make things right starting that night with the meld.

Within a few hours, and with Dr. T'soni's help, Lyla would connect with Crystal's mind and hopefully find a way to bring the ensign back.

That's why she stood outside Ensign Cousland's quarters now, to relay the good news to Isabela and Morrigan. To inform them of the plan and that there was still hope. Even if it was just a sliver of such, it was something.

Just before she was able to press the door chime, Lyla froze as she heard muffled voices float through the doors. Her unique hearing ability told her it was Morrigan and Isabela. Their voices rose in anger by the second; they argued with a rage so intense Lyla could feel their distress leaking through the air.

_Had we chosen the ritual like I said she'd still be here with us now! You killed her!_ It was Isabela's voice, shrill and distraught.

" _Please…Bela… I did not know. I did not mean to—"_ Morrigan's voice cracked. Lyla had never heard the engineer demonstrate such emotion in all the time she had known the woman.

After what sounded like an object crashing into a mountain of glass followed by a whimper and sharp screech of pain, Lyla forwent the doorbell and rushed inside without permission. Overriding the security lock with her captain's security code.

Too late did the doors swing open, too late did Lyla intervene to stop the desperate action that Isabela would never be able to take back.

The girls stood opposite ends of the living area before the door, Isabela leaned her head against the far wall facing away from the captain, head buried against her arm as she trembled between sobs. Morrigan's golden gaze caught Lyla's eye as soon as she entered the room.

The lieutenant held her nose in a clamped fist, blood gushing from beneath. Morrigan held up a hand in surrender toward Lyla with a slight shake of her wrist and pleading look on her face.

Lyla rushed over automatically and grabbed the Lieutenant's arm, gently pulling it away to assess the damage. Morrigan's nose darkened by the second, swollen and caked in the syrupy substance flowing out of it.

Her eye fell to the shattered glass encircling the engineer's feet, blood mixing with its contents now as Morrigan's nose dripped uncontrollably. Lyla's heart dropped as she recognized the object that had been thrown at the lieutenant.

Lying amongst the broken shards, was a destroyed model of a wooden ship. Wood was a rare commodity on this side of the galaxy, only commonly known to produce on the planet Earth. The only way to create it out there was to replicate the components. And to replicate something, came at the price of rations which was used as currency among the crew.

Lyla remembered the lieutenant approaching her for an advance in replicator rations some time ago, a special request to make the woman she loved a birthday gift. The engineer never asked for anything and was fully prepared to subject herself to the dissatisfaction of eating in the mess hall for three months instead of using the food replicators, so Lyla had obliged.

The elf had even been lucky enough to see the finished product. Morrigan had skillfully reconstructed a ship in a glass bottle. 'The Siren's Call' inscribed on its bow. For Isabela to destroy such a thoughtful gift spoke wonders to how she was feeling now.

"You're going to sickbay right now, Lieutenant," Lyla ordered without sparing a glance to Isabela. She just couldn't look at the pilot right then. She just couldn't understand no matter how angry you got with a spouse how you could harm them.

Morrigan shook her head. "Captain, please understand, Isabela is hurting. We both are. I cannot leave her now."

Lyla crossed her arms, anger evident as she shook her head and clenched her fists tight. The familiar rage of the tempest began to boil beneath the surface.

Without another word, Morrigan rushed to Isabela's side who spun around and wrapped the lieutenant in a close embrace, burying her face into Morrigan's neck and continuing her sobs.

Lyla stared at them a moment, trying desperately to understand how Morrigan could forgive the brunette so easily and hold the pilot in that protective hold while blood gushed down a pale face and dribbled past chapped lips.

Morrigan's gaze was a distant one, glossy and desolate as she continued to hold her lover and whisper something so softly into Isabela's ear even Lyla couldn't hear.

The captain shifted on her feet, uncertain how to interject herself onto their moment. After a brief eternity, she decided just to blurt out what she came to say. She _was_ the captain after all.

"You two get yourselves cleaned up before Crystal comes home. I'll be bringing her back tonight," Lyla said firmly taking pleasure in the shocked faces staring back at her. "I hope," she muttered under her breath.


	31. Dark Skies, Dark Dreams

“Embrace Eternity!”

Lyla felt herself drift into her own mind, it was the strangest sensation and one that she didn’t think she would ever be used to. How the Asari did this so often, she would never understand.

The world materialised before her, shimmering into view as she slowly turned around.

This was not her mind, not at all. This was Crystal’s.

And mind? Creators, that was putting it politely. This place they were standing in was nothing but a hellscape.

The last time they had shared dreams, and that had been hellish enough for a lifetime, to know that Crystal was seeing this horror forever was chilling. And a horror it truly was.

The world grew away from Lyla in burnt porous rock. It was so hot to the touch that Lyla could feel the heat through her armour. It was a good thing her mind was defensive and brought her battle-ready. Her eyes followed the landscape up, following a fire-spewing volcano as she looked up into the sky.

She shivered as she saw the deep-red palette spew more fire down onto the land. The sky was on fire and Lyla was scared. She was instantly glad she was alone and none could see.

_Lyla, are you in?_ Liara’s voice rang in her ears. This meld was strenuous enough on the Asari, and she couldn’t hold the meld together and help Lyla fight. They had agreed that she would pull Lyla out if she needed it, but that was a last resort.

“Aye, I am,” Lyla grunted into her comm badge. Liara had explained it was easier on the mind to visualise where a voice was coming from. Elves were naturally resistant to melds, apparently, and her mind would be fighting Liara’s the whole time. Anything that made the experience easier was welcome. “I’ll be in touch when I see her.”

This was where Lyla was at home. She was hunting her prey. Back home, she had been a hunter for her clan, stopping any and all threats from getting close or from escaping. Ruthless was the word for her.

She pulled her weapons out of their sheaths and growled. The Tempest was a monster, and Lyla enjoyed wearing the mask far too much. As Captain and a leader she was unable to be as brutal as she longed to be. Now though? Now she was alone and allowed to be who she was.

She bent down, reaching for the floor and taking some small rocks in her hand. She moved them around as she gathered her bearings. She left the weapons switched off for now, trusting her hearing more without the buzz of their technology.

She closed her eyes and listened.

The world was alive, more alive than she had anticipated. She had to commend Crystal’s creativity. She could hear dragons flying above, the swell of their breath before the fire erupting from their mouths. There were darkspawn howling at each other, slicing into each other. She could hear their weapons hitting each other, their disgusting flesh being cut.

She sighed as she pushed past it, ignoring the irrational hatred in her blood. Beyond that horror, she heard a feminine screech.

Crystal.

It had to be.

She took off at breakneck speed, racing towards the scream. Her fingers found the small switches on her weapons as she ran, and they ignited with power. Her axe shimmered in and out of the world as it vibrated faster than anyone could ever see, her sword erupted with a white beam, burning hotter than any fire Crystal’s mind could conjure.

She rounded a corner, sliding around the side of the volcano and a group of darkspawn met her. Her axe caught the closest one’s neck, and as she span her sword stabbed through the next. They fell as one and Lyla jumped their bodies, dancing around them as she attacked the survivors. They didn’t know what hit them. The best hunter was one that didn’t let her prey escape, and Lyla never let anything escape from her. The last darkspawn fell as Lyla caught her breath.

She hated them. Creators, she did. It was insane how much the hatred pulsated through her body, fuelling her actions and pushing her forward. Deep down, she adored the feeling.

She moved on, stepping over the carnage she had created out of those monsters. There was a large iron gate ahead and she leapt over it with ease, her armour provided her greater agility than ever her heightened elven abilities gave her. It was almost too easy.

The gate led to a courtyard with buildings on opposing sides, no doubt filled with more of the spawn. Ahead was a raised platform, and chained upon it, Crystal Cousland. Either side of her were the largest ogres she had ever seen. They both held whips and were taking turns to attack the poor woman. Lyla couldn’t look for more than a mere moment. The blood streaming down Crystal’s face was enough to turn a weaker woman’s stomach. Lyla stared into the Ensign’s eyes, searching for any hint of the fire she knew existed behind it, and after an impossibly long moment she saw kindling. That was enough.

“Halam sahlin!” _(This ends now)_ Lyla roared as banged her weapons against her chest. “Fight someone who can fight back, seth’lin. Ar tu na’lin emma mi!” _(Weak blood, I will see your blood on my blade)_

One of the ogres roared back at her and jumped down. The other grabbed a horn from its side and blew a horrendous sound.

More monsters streamed out from the barracks either side and Lyla’s feral grin made them falter.

This would be fun.

She span around daring any of them to attack. They had the numbers but she had her brute, stupid force. They might take her but she would take many with her, they knew that and none of them wanted to be the first death.

The ogre roared and picked up one of its own men, throwing it at her with a screech. She jumped over the body with a flourish and landed on one knee, holding her axe out to the side.

She through the axe at the nearest creature and laughed maniacally as it embedded in the monster’s skull. She whistled and the axe came flying back to her hand. Technology was wonderful.

They came as one then, a giant tsunami that threatened to overwhelm her, but a tempest wasn’t defeated by mere tsunamis.

She killed them as they reached her with deadly efficiency.

The ogre roared and stomped its way through the sea of monsters ahead, it stood on many of them, killing them without care. Lyla laughed as she attacked the creatures near her, the monster was doing her job for her. It reached her quickly and she jumped upon its giant hammer as he smashed the floor beside her. One more jump and she was on its shoulder in no time at all.

“I hope this hurts, alas’lin,” _(Dirty blooded)_ She screamed as she embedded her axe and sword in its neck. “Not as much as I wish it would.” She roared as she dived off his back onto a darkspawn, using her axe to brace the fall with more brutality than was perhaps needed.

She danced her way through the rest of the unending wave of monsters, hoping that if she got to Crystal she could free them both from this hell. Crystal was the key, she could see that now.

She jumped up to the raised platform, away from the deadly sea below. Only one ogre stood in her way.

It howled at her and she matched it with glee. This was where she was most alive, fighting for her clan and her life. Her crew might be different races and cultures but anyone under her care was clan, she was their Keeper and a keeper protects. They would pay for hurting Crystal and she would take that debt with blood.

“You think this is over, elf?” A booming voice echoed throughout the world, causing the darkspawn to cower in fear. “This is my realm, not yours. I WILL NOT LET HER GO!”

“You have no choice, alas’elgar,” _(Dirty spirit)_ she roared as she twirled behind the ogre, slashing the back of its legs as she did. It fell quickly to its knees and Lyla jumped on its back, burying her sword in its spine. She left it there as she stepped away.

“ **I WILL NOT BE IGNORED,** ” The voice roared, shaking the foundations of the buildings but Lyla didn’t respond.

She smashed her axe into the chains holding Crystal and caught the human as she fell free.

“Ar lasa mala revas,” _(you are free,)_ Lyla cooed as she stroked the woman’s hair.

She held her for a long moment before the world drifted away and they woke up.

**OoOoO**

Liara watched Crystal carefully as she lay in the middle of the cell. Her skin just moments ago had been cracked and grey. Covered in sores and deep rivers of pain. She hated to imagine the agony the woman would have been in. But now? Colour was slowly returning to the girl, and where the skin had been damaged it was slowly knitting itself back together before the doctor’s eyes. She would scarcely have believed it if she hadn’t seen it herself.

Already she had called the medical doctors here but it looked as though they might not be needed for anything more than a scan. Crystal looked more alive than she had since they entered Ferelden.

“Thank the Goddess.”


	32. Faded Flame

Heavy lids fluttered open to meet the most beautiful ceruleans staring down at her. Lyla smiled a goofy grin at the beautiful goddess as Leliana's warm palm continued to cup and stroke a pale cheek. The warmth of her lover's touch revitalized the elf and lured her back to life with unspoken promises of eternal contentment.

She could feel the soft toned muscles of Leliana's thighs gently flexing and shifting beneath her aching head. The elf tried and failed to sit up, the pain in her skull throbbing and searing in rebellion.

"Shhhh, ma vhenan (my heart). The meld has taken a toll on your mind. You need rest."

Lyla groaned at another wave of pain as she turned her head in Leliana's lap. She still lied on the floor of the brig where she and Liara had first initiated the meld. Across the room now, Lyla could see Dr. Wynne waving a medical scanner over an unmoving Crystal.

The elf's heart began to race as dread settled in her chest like a mass of stones. Did Crystal not make it back? Had Lyla failed her? Why wasn't she awake!?

Ignoring the agonizing weight and pounding in her head, Lyla rolled out of Leliana's cradling arms and onto hands and knees. She grit her teeth and crawled toward Crystal with every last burst of energy she could muster.

She only made it halfway across the space before she collapsed, one arm outstretched toward her fallen friend. Leliana's hands immediately fell to Lyla's shoulders and turned her onto her back, retaking her position of soother and cradling the elf in strong arms once more.

The commotion caused Wynne to look up from her work, after Lyla settled heavily into Leliana's grasp again, Wynne crossed the room and knelt beside Lyla.

"Tell me," Lyla plead, fearing the worst. "Tell me the truth. Is she gone?" Wynne's gaze turned worried, she shared a look with Leliana before turning back toward the captain. "Someone bloody well tell me what's going on, NOW!"

Wynne's expression didn't change which only fueled the growing dread inside further. "She's alive," the doctor breathed.

Okay, alive was good. Wasn't it? Wasn't it!?

OoOoO

Morrigan watched as Isabela paced back and forth impatiently. Occasionally, the brunette would grip the back of her head with laced fingers and let out a quick frustrated groan.

It had been hours since Lyla underwent the mind-meld with Dr. T'soni. Hours since Lyla had rushed into their apartment and told them of the news of there being one last plan, one last _hope_.

Just as Isabela passed Morrigan for the umpteenth time, she decided to shoot out a quick hand and pull the pilot into her. Isabela immediately hooked an arm around the back of Morrigan's neck and buried her face into the engineer's shoulder.

Morrigan released a long breath as she wrapped her arms around Isabela and held her close. She wished for nothing more than to ease her lover's pain, to ease her own pain. The hollowness inside her was agonizing. A hole that could never be filled. The only person who could heal them still laid unconscious on the other side of that door leading to the brig.

"It won't be long now, love," Morrigan whispered in Isabela's ear.

Liara had left the brig just over an hour ago, disoriented with a look of pure exhaustion on her face. She said the meld was concluded and she needed rest. She said Captain Lyla was expected to wake soon.

When questioned with the state of Crystal and whether or not the meld had been a success, she had shaken her head and said she didn't know. The officers would have to wait and see. Isabela squeezed Morrigan tighter, whimpering into the engineer's uniform as she did so.

The pilot had been so distraught that Morrigan had gotten hurt when she threw the glass ship at the lieutenant's face. She had apologized profusely the whole trip to sickbay and the entire time Dr. Chakwas mended Morrigan's nose back to full health.

Morrigan had shrugged off the apologies of course, saying Isabela was stressed and not thinking clearly. Neither of them were. They were broken. And without their third counterpart, would forever be incomplete.

Morrigan pressed soft lips to the top of the deep blue bandana the pilot always wore. Isabela pulled away to meet Morrigan's gaze before cupping the engineer's jawline and pulling her in for a full passionate clash of lips.

Morrigan's back crashed with the wall behind her as the pilot kissed back harder, firmer, hungrier. It had been so long since they'd last kissed. Too long, since they showed expression of their love. Hope conquered the overwhelming feeling of desolation in Morrigan's heart when the kiss ended.

Isabela gazed at her lover through hooded lids with a sad smile as she whispered, "I love you. No matter what, I will never not."

Just then, the door to the brig hissed open and out stepped Captain Lyla with Leliana at her side. The elf looked as exhausted as Dr. T'soni had earlier. The meld clearly came with consequences. Leliana held tightly to Lyla's arm, seemingly to keep her steady and upright.

Lyla was pale, her breathing uneven, and steps shaky. But she held her head high when she marched through the doorway. Undoubtedly the elf was being stubborn and would never allow her crew to think her weak. It amazed the engineer to no end.

When Lyla's eye landed on the officers, she opened her mouth to speak. And this was it, the moment they'd all been waiting for.

Morrigan unknowingly held her breath as she waited for words that never came. Instead, Lyla's mouth closed again as her gaze turned downward toward the carpeted hallway, sorrow falling over her.

"Captain?" It was Isabela who spoke first. "How is she? Is Crystal… back?"

"She's alive," Leliana answered. "Lyla, why don't you head home without me? I'll be along shortly."

Lyla shook her head and stood straighter. "No vhenan, you go. I'm the Captain. It should be me to tell them."

With a nod, Leliana reluctantly released the elf's arm and disappeared around the corner.

Bricks filled Morrigan's chest as she waited for Lyla's report on Crystal. What was wrong?

"Can we see her?" Morrigan asked.

All sense of hope fluttered and faded away completely when Lyla shook her head. "She isn't here."

"What!?" Morrigan and Isabela said in unison.

"I had her transported back to your quarters, ladies. I didn't feel she was ready to walk the halls just yet. She isn't… the same. Dr. Wynne is with her now."

Morrigan's brows drew together. "Captain? What do you mean? Is she alright, or isn't she?

Morrigan grew more frustrated by the second. She needed answers.

Lyla let out a long exhale before pushing her shoulders back and finally delivering the blow. "Ensign Cousland has shown signs of brain damage. Wynne can explain more when you return, but her scans have shown elevated stress levels and hypersensitive responses. We're not sure if she recognizes anyone or if she even knows where she is. She isn't out of the water just yet. It is my sincere hope she makes a full recovery, but prepare yourselves, the Crystal Cousland that we once knew, may be gone indefinitely."

OoOoO

Morrigan and Isabela wasted no time hurrying back to their quarters. It was the longest turbolift ride of Morrigan's life, feeling as though an eternity had passed before they finally reached home and found Crystal sitting on their padded sofa sitting with Dr. Wynne.

The brunette faced away from them, looking down at something in her lap. Wynne rose to her feet as the girls entered and quickly pulled them off to the side away from Crystal while whispering, "Easy ladies. You're going to need to take things slow with her."

Isabela looked like a wild animal about to pounce in an effort to protect her cub at all costs. Morrigan slipped her fingers between the pilot's and squeezed reassuringly. She took a deep breath as her heart began to race in anticipation.

They were so close, Crystal was home and sitting just a few feet away from them. It wouldn't be long until they could speak again and hopefully embrace. They just needed answers first.

"Can we see her?" Isabela asked impatiently.

Wynne held both hands up indicating for everyone to calm down and lower their voices. "Not just yet. We need to speak first. You have to understand Crystal has been through an intense trauma. She hasn't spoken yet or indicated that she knows any of us or where she is."

"The captain said you found signs of brain damage?" Morrigan asked.

Wynne nodded. "Yes. But it isn't clear how extensive or what it stems to just yet. She seems to have full motor function, it's just a matter of determining the cognitive impairment. It's possible the damage has extended to her memory centers or even speech function. Unfortunately, her stress levels rise dangerously high when I try to examine her."

"What do we do, Doctor? How do we approach her?" Isabela asked.

"Slowly and delicately. Crystal should be considered a trauma victim and treated as such. My advice is not to touch her. From what Lyla's told me, the realm in which she resided was a torturous and very stressful one. Let her come to you. No sudden movements. If her memory is indeed lacking, I thought it best she stays here with you two. Try to keep things as familiar as possible. But keep things calm. Hopefully, with rest, she'll start to improve."

"Thank you, Doctor."

Wynne nodded at Morrigan before crossing the room to the ensign and beckoning the other officers over. "Crystal?" she cooed. "There's a couple of people here to see you."

Crystal didn't look up as Isabela and Morrigan slowly approached the sofa. Crystal continued to stare at her lap, fumbling with something between her fingers. As they drew closer, Morrigan's heart skipped a beat as Crystal twirled and flipped the broken pieces of the miniature toy ship of the Siren's Call in her hands.

Morrigan was immediately grateful they had cleaned up the broken glass before they'd left for sickbay earlier. The engineer had kept the pieces of the ship and left them on the coffee table. Did Crystal remember? Was that why she stared so intently at the pieces? Or did she just find them interesting?

Wynne looked to the crewmembers before nodding and saying, "I'll leave her with you then. I'll check in periodically. If you need anything at all please raise me on the comm."

After Wynne disappeared through the sliding doors of their apartment, Isabela and Morrigan shared a nervous glance, both uncertain how to proceed. Crystal had yet to acknowledge they're presence.

They really didn't want to screw this up. They had been through so much the last few days. So close to losing the woman they loved. And now that she was finally home, they didn't want to come that close ever again.

Being the brave one, Morrigan released Isabela's sweaty palm and crossed to the couch before slowly sitting beside Crystal. She was sure to keep sufficient distance between them.

"Crystal?" Morrigan's voice was barely above a whisper. She spoke as gently as she could. Willing with her very soul that Crystal would raise her head and look at the lieutenant again. It had been so long since she'd seen those beautiful sapphires. She longed to reconnect with them.

As if reading her thoughts, Crystal looked up and granted Morrigan's wish but with one significant difference. Crystal's eyes no longer portrayed the color of vibrant oceans. Instead, the brunette sported two unfocused silvers with faded pupils.

"Crystal," Morrigan said again. "Do you know who I am?"

It shouldn't have come as a shock to the system or a knife to the gut when Crystal shook her head and looked away but that's what happened.

Then, tears stung the lieutenant's eyes all over again.


	33. Promises to Keep.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Apologies for the delay in this chapter

Lyla and Jane sat in silence in the conference room. The weight of the decision ahead was heavy and the atmosphere was thick with the tension between them. The appointment with Weisshaupt, the Warden Headquarters, was in less than ten minutes and the Captains were anxious to get it over with.

They both knew that the Wardens back home would never believe what they had seen, never believe that the taint can take over a person's body and turn one against ones friends. Crystal had been pulled back from the brink but she was changed and broken, something hopefully time would fix, but Lyla would not send more against the blight needlessly and without the full information.

When they had arrived in Ferelden, no one had expected the reports of a blight to be accurate, they never truly were, and over the centuries since the last true blight, all the secrets and knowledge had been lost. It was terrifying to realise that Lyla was perhaps one of the most well informed wardens there was, and she knew practically nothing.

Weisshaupt would call them back for questioning, send more innocent naïve wardens in their place, and both Lyla and Shepard refused to let that happen.

They had prepared for this meeting, and the inevitable fallout, as well as one could. The monitoring devices had all been removed, and both captains trusted the loyalty of their crews to not betray them to their leaders. That did not make what they were about to do any easier, this was treason and a breaking of the pacts that both women had sworn to uphold. They were turning their backs on the institution that saved and trained them both, and that was the most difficult thing either had had to ever do.

"God, I could use a whiskey right now," Shepard laughed as she lit her cigar. "Something to take the edge off this."

"Agreed, something strong and disgusting to focus me would be helpful," Lyla laughed as she reached under the table. "Fortunately I came prepared." She lifted the bottle of Dragon's Piss that they had shared in the medbay when Shepard had first awoken, and Shepard's grin exploded.

"Fucking hell, Mahariel, you are the best captain I've served with," she smirked as she sat forward. Two glasses sat in the middle of the table and Shepard took the bottle and poured them both a drink.

"To the future," she muttered as she held her drink up.

"And whatever it may bring," Lyla replied. They drank their drinks quickly and both groaned as it burnt their throats.

The comm unit sprung from the table and rang. It was time.

**OoOoO**

Leliana sat behind her desk in her new office, reading over more information than she had ever known existed in the federation. Information on the planets in Ferelden, the people, the histories, the alliances, and anything else she could have wanted. She had downloaded everything she could from the database, storing it in the computers of the Griffon, and with the help of the AI, EDI, she was combing through what she needed when her wife's voice rang overhead.

"Attention all crew," Lyla's voice was wobbly and sad, something Leliana rarely heard in the Captain's voice. "Gather in the docking bay ASAP."

The sound of boots marching and murmuring of the crowd rumbled through the thin walls of Leliana's office and she rose to join them, just as confused.

The sea of people that inhabited the Griffon rarely came together as one, there was always a skeleton crew left to man the stations and the engines, but right now? All but the emergency systems were running, EDI could manage that on her own. Everyone was gathering, it was a first for the Griffon since they had left Weisshaupt.

The docking bay was full of people when Leliana arrived and a small stage had been erected on the far wall, Captains Mahariel and Shepard stood upon it and Leliana made her way to the front of the crowd to get a good view of them.

"Welcome, my friends," Shepard waved them all in, her cigar dropping ash everywhere as she dangled it about. "Is everyone here?" she waited as a murmur of agreement washed over the crowd and then held a hand up to silence them. "I know you are all curious as to why we are gathered here and Captain Mahariel will explain in just a moment, however I need to inform the crews of both my old ship and my new ship that we are one. Normandy and Griffon are now one crew, one people, one big happy fucking family, and Mahariel here is your captain. I am standing down and finally back to the rank I deserve, Commander. I'll be second in command to Mahariel, any issues come to me and I'll tell you just how to fuck off." The crowd laughed as Shepard smirked, she bowed and made eye contact with the crowd before stepping back and allowing Lyla to take centre stage.

"Lethallanen _(friends)_ ," She began as her eye searched the crowd before finally finding Leliana's. "No, not friends, that isn't close enough. Family, brothers, sisters, siblings, I am here to inform you that Weisshaupt wants us to leave this system and return home. They want us to abandon the war and leave the innocent people here to die. They want to leave the monster that killed our sister ship to kill more."

The crowd grew wild and shouted disagreements towards the captain, Leliana smiled as she watched Lyla's eye widen with excitement.

"I SAY NO!" She roared and the crew roared with her. "WE WILL TEACH THAT BEAST WHAT HAPPENS WHEN YOU ANGER THE WARDENS, THE NORMANDY, AND THE TEMPEST! I will have my vengeance and I will save this system, this galaxy, this universe from its grasp. Today, I start a new federation, a strong federation, a federation designed to protect those who cannot protect themselves, and to fiercely defend our family. Today, I break free from the weak-willed leaders of Weisshaupt. Today, I am no longer their warden. TODAY, I AM FREE!" she screamed and the crowd went silent.

"This is treason and mutiny, you must understand, but this is for the greater good. I know there will be some in the crowd who do not wish to commit these crimes, and do not wish to face their punishment. This is understandable and both Commander Shepard and I agree that it is not shameful. Those of you who do not wish to join us on this crusade of freedom and vengeance, there are ships here which can take you home to Weisshaupt. Please, my siblings, do not be ashamed to say your piece and leave now."

The crowd grew silent as the implication of what was to come dawned upon them. What felt like hours passed and finally Leliana had had enough, she raised her voice and stared at her love in the eye.

"Captain, if that's all, can we return to work? There is a lot of information we can get from the Warden database before they cut us off." The crowd behind her cheered in agreement and Leliana teared up as a gorgeous warm smile hit the lips of her wife.

"Of course," Lyla grinned. "You are all dismissed."

The future was uncertain and what it would hold was both perilous and full of fortune. But that is all in the future, now? Now they were free.

Tomorrow was the war but tomorrow was a long way away.

END OF PART 1

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> And there it is! The end of book 1!! Release date of Book 2 is to be confirmed, keep an eye on nattywrighty.tumblr.com for an announcement!


	34. Nothing's Over

_Crystal… Crystal…_

What was left of Crystal Cousland stared blankly out the window of her apartment while two women argued in hushed whispers behind her. Did they think she couldn't hear them? Did they really believe Crystal didn't realize she was broken? Her spirit destroyed and soul having been devoured?

_Crystal… Crystal…_

Crystal shut her eyes and inhaled deeply as that monstrous rasp continued to breathe her name in that mocking tone. That same demonic whisper to have haunted her for what felt an eternity now.

Crossing her arms, she hugged herself tightly and leaned against the windowpane. The coolness of the glass against her forehead soothed the ache inside.

_We're not done yet, dear Crystal. Not even close…_

The former ensign swallowed hard and resumed her glossy staring contest with the universe outside. No matter how hard she tried, she could not block out the voice. At every turn, the archdemon remained with her, in her mind and by her side.

The beast had followed her back to the realm in which she had once lived. A reality where Crystal Cousland had once thrived under the leadership of an honorable elven captain and had built a network of friends and colleagues who respected her.

She had even been lucky enough to form a relationship with not one but two beautiful and brilliant women. Morrigan and Isabela.

Those were the strangers arguing and stressing in the background now as they tried desperately to figure out how to get back the Crystal they once knew. Their search was a waste of time. Their efforts futile.

She was just an empty shell now, ensnared by the claws of a demon no one else could sense or see.

"Crystal?"

Crystal flinched and jerked when a gentle hand came to rest ever so lightly on her right shoulder. The brunette spun around to find the one named Morrigan looking at her worriedly. Crystal rubbed at the limb and continued to inch away like the woman was poison.

She couldn't help it. It was still incredibly difficult to be touched by another. Violent, vibrant images of her time among the darkspawn in that horrific realm would flash in her mind, and she'd relive the atrocities all over again.

Dark skeletal heads and abhorrent grins of monsters who sought nothing more than to torture and paint themselves in the blood of their victims. Again and again, the sharpest of claws and teeth would rip through weak, sensitive flesh like cheese to a grater. The act continuous, slow, and excruciating.

She couldn't un-see the things one should never see. Or un-feel the things one should never experience. What happened to her was a crime beyond measure and there were no making things right again. No way back to her former self or life. No respite. Why couldn't anyone understand that?

"Crystal?" Morrigan repeated softly.

Faded silvers carefully flickered to golden suns. She recognized Morrigan from scrambled memories but could not remember who she _was_. Both Morrigan and Isabela felt as everyone else did to Crystal, _like strangers_.

"I'm sorry," Morrigan said gently. "I did not mean to frighten you."

 _It's you who should be frightened_ , Crystal thought sadly. _You're staring at a monster and don't even know it._

"I just wanted to tell you Isabela has left for her duty shift. 'Tis just you and I for the day."

Crystal turned back to the window for the umpteenth time, her only sense of safety lied with the darkness beyond the reinforced glass casing.

The only comfort she seemed able to experience now came from staring into the endless depths of space and stars and night and nothing. A vacant pit of emptiness. Like her.

_The time for self-loathing has come to an end, child. The time for plotting and weaving the path ahead is here. Together, we shall shift and shape the future in our favor. Heed your first task, human. Kill for me. Kill the Warden._


End file.
